The Conservative Cave

Current Events => General Discussion => Topic started by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 05, 2011, 12:07:48 PM

Title: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 05, 2011, 12:07:48 PM
Dear Muslim friend,

I'm taking a moment to write to you in the aftermath of a serious turn of events which I'm certain you've heard of by now; namely, the death of Usama bin Laden.

As you may also be aware the American polity is involved in a deep internal debate as to whether or not it would be appropriate to release photos taken that fateful night of Mr. Bin Laden after his life had been lossed.

There are abiding concerns that you, our Muslim friend, will be upset, inflamed, enraged or any one of a number of negative dispositions.

YOUR FEELINGS IN THIS MATTER ARE IMPORTANT TO US

If you find yourself deeply offended, saddened or otherwise upset by recent events please take a moment to register your thoughts with us by filling out the simple form below:


Name:  ___________ al _____________ bin ______________

Any aliases by which you are known: __________________________ , ________________________ , ____________________ (please use back of page if more space is needed)

Addresss: ____________________________________________________________

Current GPS coordinates: _____________________________

Place of employment: _____________________________

Work schedule: _________________________________________

Where do you bank (please include off-shore accounts)?: ______________________________________________

Please help us prioritize our responses by gauging your degree of outrage (circle one): 1 - slapping my head     2 - slapping my wife    3 - burning something    4 - Killing a Jew

When would be a good time to meet with you?:  _________________

Would you be willing to bring friends who share your concerns?:  ____ Y ____ N   If "Yes" how many will be joinging you?: __________   


Thank-you for helping us to reach out to you and allowing us to demonstrate how important we regard your feelings.
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 05, 2011, 12:32:26 PM
Dear Muslim friend,

I'm taking a moment to write to you in the aftermath of a serious turn of events which I'm certain you've heard of by now; namely, the death of Usama bin Laden.

As you may also be aware the American polity is involved in a deep internal debate as to whether or not it would be appropriate to release photos taken that fateful night of Mr. Bin Laden after his life had been lossed.

There are abiding concerns that you, our Muslim friend, will be upset, inflamed, enraged or any one of a number of negative dispositions.

YOUR FEELINGS IN THIS MATTER ARE IMPORTANT TO US

If you find yourself deeply offended, saddened or otherwise upset by recent events please take a moment to register your thoughts with us by filling out the simple form below:


Name:  _Willie____ al ____Dun____ bin _****edup_____________

Any aliases by which you are known: __Markeesious____Jackson__________ , ________________________ , ____________________ (please use back of page if more space is needed)

Addresss: __BoBo's Buick_____________________________

Current GPS coordinates: _____I'm an ignorant raghead.__

Place of employment: __Welfare, unemployment and SSDI___________________________

Work schedule: _None________________________________________

Where do you bank (please include off-shore accounts)?: ______________________________________________

Please help us prioritize our responses by gauging your degree of outrage (circle one): 1 - slapping my head     2 - slapping my wife    3 - burning something    4 - Killing a Jew

When would be a good time to meet with you?:  __While soberWould you be willing to bring friends who share your concerns?:  __X__ Y ____ N   If "Yes" how many will be joinging you?: ___a gang__
Thank-you for helping us to reach out to you and allowing us to demonstrate how important we regard your feelings.
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 05, 2011, 10:46:03 PM
New and improved version:

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v630/MrSnuggleBunny/Dear-Muslim-friend-600.jpg)
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: Thor on May 06, 2011, 06:28:05 AM
 :lmao: :lmao:
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: Ptarmigan on May 06, 2011, 11:56:34 AM
I wonder if there is a form for anyone to be one of the 72 Virgins that bin Laden always pushes to Jihadists. I can vouch for many potential 72 virgins.  :fuelfire: :-)
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: DefiantSix on May 06, 2011, 12:03:22 PM
I wonder if there is a form for anyone to be one of the 72 Virgins that bin Laden always pushes PUSHED.  :-)

Past tense, Lagophobe.  FIFY. :II:
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 06, 2011, 07:44:43 PM
I wonder if there is a form for anyone to be one of the 72 Virgins that bin Laden always pushes to Jihadists. I can vouch for many potential 72 virgins.  :fuelfire: :-)

Virgin like balloon, one prick, all gone.
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: Eupher on May 06, 2011, 07:56:42 PM
 :rotf:

Well done, Snugs!
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: vesta111 on May 08, 2011, 09:17:48 AM
Virgin like balloon, one prick, all gone.

OH NO, not if you live in Asia.

One of the biggest money making surgery's in Japan today is reconstructive surgery on woman the month before Marriage. India with arranged marriages the practice is catching on, as in the middle east.

This is one of the wonders of the world, how come so many 35 year old virgins come to America as virgins and marry country bumpkins that swear their wife was a virgin .

For men there is only one first time, for woman with some money and a good doctor, there can be many first times.

 
Title: Re: SGT Snuggle Bunny's Muslim Outreach
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 08, 2011, 09:56:46 AM
OH NO, not if you live in Asia.

One of the biggest money making surgery's in Japan today is reconstructive surgery on woman the month before Marriage. India with arranged marriages the practice is catching on, as in the middle east.

This is one of the wonders of the world, how come so many 35 year old virgins come to America as virgins and marry country bumpkins that swear their wife was a virgin .

For men there is only one first time, for woman with some money and a good doctor, there can be many first times.

 

...or they  ccould use the usual lie and save some money. "I've only had 3 lovers in my entire life. My husband was my first, then there was my lover and now you."