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Current Events => The DUmpster => The DUmping Ground => Topic started by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 08:05:56 AM

Title: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02 Stinky The Clown
Post by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 08:05:56 AM
Well, well.

He made it.....almost.

Stinky The Clown ran way far ahead of primitives #20-03, but alas the TOP DUmmie of 2010 ran way far ahead of the sparkling husband primitive.

But second place isn't so bad, as we in Nebraska used to remind Oklahoma, those glory years when Nebraska thumped Oklahoma; it's near the top, and it's ahead of everybody else but the one in first place.

Nope.  Second place isn't so bad; it's ahead of, like, about 182 other places.

The sparkling husband primitive is 64-65 years old, and lives with his wife in a sort-of rundown residential neighborhood of Baltimore.  Not a bad neighborhood by any means, but houses and places grow old too.  And besides, a modest neighborhood is a good "cover" for wealth; it discourages the impression in other people that one has money.

The sparkling household has a full-time "Hazel"-type maid to take care of running the house.

The sparkling couple have two, perhaps three, children, adults.

The sparkling husband primitive served in the U.S. Navy 1965-1967, in South Carolina, protecting America from invasion from the Canary Islands, and so despite his character flaws, one must be grateful to the sparkling husband primitive for his service; one imagines life in America today, under the steel jack-boot of the Canarians, wouldn't be as good as it presently is.

The sparkling husband primitive likes dogs.

The sparkling husband primitive owns a home-based business, the nature of which is ambiguous, but it's easy to connect the dots.

.the sparkling husband primitive is of Italianate derivation.
.the sparkling husband primitive was born and raised in Bridgeport, Connecticut.
.Bridgeport at the time was (and perhaps still is) a mob-run city.
.the tentacles of mobs stretch far outside one's home base, what with subsidiaries and alliances.
.the sparkling husband primitive, after leaving the Navy, moved to Baltimore, Maryland.
.Baltimore at the time was run by the mob boss Thomas d'Alessandro, allied with the mob in Bridgeport.
.during the 1960s, the d'Alessandro operations expanded to San Francisco, California.
.Bela Pelosi is the daughter of the late mob boss Thomas d'Alessandro.
.the sparkling husband primitive has nothing but kind words for the ex-Speaker of the House.
.the sparkling husband primitive frequently travels to San Francisco, to consult with associates with names such as Moe, Izzy, Sal, Manny, Lido, Giudo, Lucky, Silvestro, Carlo, Whiney Louie, and possibly even Bela's husband.

The dots all go in a single straight line.

That's only speculation, but if anyone can think of anything better, about what the sparkling husband primitive's home-based business is, please illuminate us.

The sparkling husband primitive is under the thumb of the sparkling husband primitive's wife; it's obvious who wears the pants, makes the decisions, in that Terrapinical household.

The sparkling husband primitive's wife, concerned for the odoriferous well-being of the bathrooms on the first and second floors of their home, makes the sparkling husband primitive use the bathroom in the basement, in which is also the cat litter-box.

The sparkling husband primitive takes up quite a chunk in the archives of the DUmpster, so here are only a few of his gems of 2010:

the sparkling husband primitive is shunned by other primitives:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,41215.0

the sparkling husband primitive looks for meaningful difference:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,42977.0

the sparkling husband primitive thinks of George Bush:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,44814.0

the sparkling husband primitive vows to stay a liberal:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46054.0

the sparkling husband primitive gets personal about Bela Pelosi:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46489.0

the sparkling husband primitive on balance:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46854.0

the sparkling husband primitive questions tax cuts:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46857.0

the sparkling husband primitive is our friend:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46980.0

the sparkling husband primitive a packrat, hoarder:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,46993.0

the sparkling husband primitive wants a little help:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,47130.0

the sparkling husband primitive teaches us history:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,47276.0

the sparkling husband primitive bashes Craig'sList:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,48265.0

the sparkling husband primitive leaving on a jet plane:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,48442.0

the sparkling husband primitive going to tune out:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,50634.0

the sparkling husband primitive tuned out:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,50797.0

the sparkling husband primitive questions Bela Pelosi's airplane:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,50798.0

the sparkling husband primitive has problems with dogs and hawks:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,50811.0

the sparkling husband primitive really sorry for Alan Grayson:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,50843.0

the sparkling husband primitive gives us a picture of small business:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,52375.0

the sparkling husband primitive can't make a point:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,52458.0
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Chris_ on December 30, 2010, 08:07:51 AM
Great, now he'll be bragging about it all year.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 08:11:01 AM
Great, now he'll be bragging about it all year.

I figured you wouldn't be happy, sir, but who are we, to go against the common wisdom of the people?
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: BlueStateSaint on December 30, 2010, 08:15:03 AM
Guess that this takes the fun out of figuring out who is #1 . . .  ::) :whatever: :tongue:
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Ballygrl on December 30, 2010, 08:15:14 AM
Noooooooooo! can't say anything else right now! :banghead:
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 08:17:24 AM
Guess that this takes the fun out of figuring out who is #1 . . .  ::) :whatever: :tongue:

Well now, wait.

The TOP DUmmie of 2010 was a surprise to franksolich, so probably others will be surprised too.

That is, unless this is one of those instances where franksolich's the last one to know.....
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Chris_ on December 30, 2010, 08:23:48 AM
Noooooooooo! can't say anything else right now! :banghead:

Are your nominees not doing well? :rofl:

I haven't been keeping track and I have no clue who #1 could possibly be.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Karin on December 30, 2010, 08:53:04 AM
He wasn't on my list.  Boo to the voters.  Stinky would pepper his posts with F bombs and spilled cocktails and think they were "edgy."   I never found him terribly interesting, nor as outrageous as he perhaps thinks he is. 
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Ballygrl on December 30, 2010, 08:54:27 AM
Are your nominees not doing well? :rofl:

I haven't been keeping track and I have no clue who #1 could possibly be.

LOL, it's not that, I'm just ticked because he's been campaigning for months now and I purposely didn't nominate him because he wanted to win so bad.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Chris_ on December 30, 2010, 08:57:03 AM
Same here.  Didn't nominate him and didn't vote for the little ass bandit.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: MoshMasterD on December 30, 2010, 09:44:01 AM
Why is it no one can remember him faking a heart attack several years ago?  hence rhe name ol' Fred Sanford.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: NHSparky on December 30, 2010, 09:54:40 AM
He wasn't on my list.  Boo to the voters.  Stinky would pepper his posts with F bombs and spilled cocktails and think they were "edgy."   I never found him terribly interesting, nor as outrageous as he perhaps thinks he is. 

IOW, he's trying to plagiarize Hunter S. Thompson's mannerisms, while the Pittstain merely tries to plagiarize his writing (along with everyone else's work.)
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 09:55:15 AM
Why is it no one can remember him faking a heart attack several years ago?  hence rhe name ol' Fred Sanford.

You know, sir, thank you for reminding me of that.

I remembered when it happened, but then sort of forgot all about it.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: DefiantSix on December 30, 2010, 10:34:57 AM
(http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php?action=dlattach;attach=2393;type=avatar)

I'm just curious how in the hell Frank got a picture of Sparkly's chest...  :naughty:
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: thundley4 on December 30, 2010, 10:41:44 AM
(http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php?action=dlattach;attach=2393;type=avatar)

I'm just curious how in the hell Frank got a picture of Sparkly's chest...  :naughty:

No way in hell is that sparkly.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: DefiantSix on December 30, 2010, 10:44:57 AM
No way in hell is that sparkly.

Can you think of anybody else stupid enough to claim Stinky the Clown as their own? :confused:
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: blitzkrieg_17 on December 30, 2010, 11:09:05 AM
Same here.  Didn't nominate him and didn't vote for the little ass bandit.

I did. But my votes were cast in no particular order.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: GOBUCKS on December 30, 2010, 11:20:53 AM
My guess: The Kansas public school system takes two consecutive Top DUmmy awards. I hope I'm wrong, because Proud2BDUmb Anne would be insufferable.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Ballygrl on December 30, 2010, 11:21:58 AM
:lmao: at frank's avatar!
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on December 30, 2010, 11:25:24 AM
My guess: The Kansas public school system takes two consecutive Top DUmmy awards. I hope I'm wrong, because Proud2BDUmb Anne would be insufferable.

That wouldn't say much for the state of Kansas, if it's the case.

However, remember that the Die alte Sau is from Kansas, lives in Kansas.....but teaches in Missouri.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Tucker on December 30, 2010, 01:07:03 PM
That wouldn't say much for the state of Kansas, if it's the case.

However, remember that the Die alte Sau is from Kansas, lives in Kansas.....but teaches in Missouri.

But the trophy might reside in Kansas. With a little luck, a house will fall on her.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Tucker on December 30, 2010, 01:19:17 PM
Just a thought.

I don't think that we should overlook "Name removed".
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Randy on December 30, 2010, 03:07:03 PM
Why is it no one can remember him faking a heart attack several years ago?  hence rhe name ol' Fred Sanford.

I remember it. He was supposed to do something about something and went missing for a few days. Crawled back with the story of heart attacks and rough days. Didn't cramp his style a bit, nor his posting frequency which ran up the ole BS flag. If I remember correctly we decided what he really had was gas.  :-)
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: USA4ME on December 30, 2010, 04:35:40 PM
Ah, crud.  That means Anne is probably top primitive.

We really gotta start finding some new meat on the island to observe.  The same old group is becoming stale.  I think in 2011 I'm going to just look for out-of-the-mainstream primitives for a change of pace.

.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: MoshMasterD on December 31, 2010, 03:55:03 AM
I remember it. He was supposed to do something about something and went missing for a few days. Crawled back with the story of heart attacks and rough days. Didn't cramp his style a bit, nor his posting frequency which ran up the ole BS flag. If I remember correctly we decided what he really had was gas.  :-)



The old (if he is) ****'s a fraud.  I remember many were feeling sorry for him, except me .  I called shinanaghans on that.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on December 31, 2010, 05:56:57 AM
The old (if he is) ****'s a fraud.  I remember many were feeling sorry for him, except me .  I called shenanigans on that.

Well, the sparkling husband primitive is no spring chicken, but one has to remember he has "friends," business associates of his.

I'm always really careful to not step over boundaries on him, saying only nice things about the sparkling husband primitive, because I don't want to see Slash-face Sal or Leg-breaker Luigi coming to the Sandhills of Nebraska, looking for me.

The sparkling husband primitive is a Tragedy one oftentimes finds on Skins's island.

The sparkling husband primitive was born to be, fated to be, destined to be, something else, but no, the sparkling husband primitive didn't want to be that, and so chose to be something else.

If one follows one's God-given natural inclinations--the healthy ones--one cannot help but to thrive, flourish, and prosper.  But if one goes against those natural inclinations, choosing instead to be base and selfish, one's life ends up being a screwed-up mess.

Just as with Chief S itting Bull, the bird-smacking stoned red-faced primitive who, if he'd accepted that he was destined to work in a textile factory in New Hampshire, would be sitting pretty now, what with a six-figure 401K plan and a generous pension, instead of being the loser he is.

The sparkling husband primitive was in the U.S. Navy 1965-1967, and then for some silly reason got out.

I dunno why he left; the sparkling husband primitive was created for the U.S. Navy, and the U.S. Navy was created for the sparkling husband primitive.  If he'd stuck it out, I have no doubt he'd be a fleet commander by now.

One shouldn't go against one's natural talents, and try to become something one can never be.

It always ends badly.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02 Stinky The Clown
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 01, 2011, 12:55:33 AM
DUmmy Husb2Sparkly just isn't a good writer. Compared to TiTtyboy, or even Pam, he's hardly literate - he's simply vulgar and DUmb. Unlike DUmbasses, decent and civilized people very rarely equate vulgarity with cleverness.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02 Stinky The Clown
Post by: franksolich on January 01, 2011, 06:15:50 AM
DUmmy Husb2Sparkly just isn't a good writer. Compared to TiTtyboy, or even Pam, he's hardly literate - he's simply vulgar and DUmb. Unlike DUmbasses, decent and civilized people very rarely equate vulgarity with cleverness.

Well, isn't vulgarity prevalent among the mob?

I mean, these guys are hardly aesthetes or dilettantes.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Ballygrl on January 01, 2011, 08:41:24 AM
I'm always really careful to not step over boundaries on him, saying only nice things about the sparkling husband primitive, because I don't want to see Slash-face Sal or Leg-breaker Luigi coming to the Sandhills of Nebraska, looking for me.

Just an FYI frank, speaking as someone from Brooklyn and is part Italian and as someone who has some "interesting" Italian relatives, I assure you that if "Slash-face Sal" and "Leg-breaker Luigi" exist they would tend to love America and would never associate with people like regressives who tend to have "hate America views".
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on January 01, 2011, 08:44:39 AM
Just an FYI frank, speaking as someone from Brooklyn and is part Italian and as someone who has some "interesting" Italian relatives, I assure you that if "Slash-face Sal" and "Leg-breaker Luigi" exist they would tend to love America and would never associate with people like regressives who tend to have "hate America views".

I assure you madam, franksolich has no anti-Italian prejudices.

Wonderful people, people of Italian derivation.

Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Ballygrl on January 01, 2011, 08:48:33 AM
I assure you madam, franksolich has no anti-Italian prejudices.

Wonderful people, people of Italian derivation.

Oh I know LOL, my point was that the odds of Stinky having friends known as Slash-face Sal and Leg-breaker Luigi would be pretty much slim to none. I don't know of 1 Italian who would sit by and listen to rants of regressives when it comes to America, they would never be friends with people who are apologists for terrorists etc. and they would never accept people who support Assange.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: franksolich on January 01, 2011, 08:53:31 AM
Oh I know LOL, my point was that the odds of Stinky having friends known as Slash-face Sal and Leg-breaker Luigi would be pretty much slim to none. I don't know of 1 Italian who would sit by and listen to rants of regressives when it comes to America, they would never be friends with people who are apologists for terrorists etc. and they would never accept people who support Assange.

I know what you mean.

For example, while mob boss Meyer Lansky (but who was of Judaic derivation, not Italian) was not a nice guy, there was never any doubt he loved America for reasons other than just milking America.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: Tucker on January 01, 2011, 09:50:03 AM
I know what you mean.

For example, while mob boss Meyer Lansky (but who was of Judaic derivation, not Italian) was not a nice guy, there was never any doubt he loved America for reasons other than just milking America.

Charles "Lucky" Luciano was Sicilian. The Mafia's aid in assisting America During WW ll is well documented. The Mafia hated Mussolini with a passion. I think it was because Mussolini was a Fascist and wanted to take control of the Cosa Nostra which would hinder their criminal enterprises in America.
Title: Re: Top DUmmies of 2010: #02
Post by: MoshMasterD on January 01, 2011, 04:00:29 PM
Well, the sparkling husband primitive is no spring chicken, but one has to remember he has "friends," business associates of his.

I'm always really careful to not step over boundaries on him, saying only nice things about the sparkling husband primitive, because I don't want to see Slash-face Sal or Leg-breaker Luigi coming to the Sandhills of Nebraska, looking for me.

The sparkling husband primitive is a Tragedy one oftentimes finds on Skins's island.

The sparkling husband primitive was born to be, fated to be, destined to be, something else, but no, the sparkling husband primitive didn't want to be that, and so chose to be something else.

If one follows one's God-given natural inclinations--the healthy ones--one cannot help but to thrive, flourish, and prosper.  But if one goes against those natural inclinations, choosing instead to be base and selfish, one's life ends up being a screwed-up mess.

Just as with Chief S itting Bull, the bird-smacking stoned red-faced primitive who, if he'd accepted that he was destined to work in a textile factory in New Hampshire, would be sitting pretty now, what with a six-figure 401K plan and a generous pension, instead of being the loser he is.

The sparkling husband primitive was in the U.S. Navy 1965-1967, and then for some silly reason got out.

I dunno why he left; the sparkling husband primitive was created for the U.S. Navy, and the U.S. Navy was created for the sparkling husband primitive.  If he'd stuck it out, I have no doubt he'd be a fleet commander by now.

One shouldn't go against one's natural talents, and try to become something one can never be.

It always ends badly.

Oh please Mr. Mobster, don't send your goons after me!!!   :rotf: