The Conservative Cave
The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: BattleHymn on November 16, 2010, 05:32:41 PM
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I need an idea for a prank to retaliate for a prank that was pulled on my wife and her parents by her sister and boyfriend last year at Thanksgiving.
They thought it was funny to make everybody think they were going to have a baby together, and that one was already on the way.
I'm fishing for ideas here. Anyone has a particularly dastardly idea, throw it on me! :cheersmate:
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Call and say you'll be late to dinner, because you were arrested for drunk driving.
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I always show up late anyways. That might be just the ticket! :lmao:
I like the emotional stress factor. Nice.
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You could always set it up that your wife has discovered that she's a lesbian and you're going to get a sex change operation. If they're not Liberals, they'll freak out.....
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You could always set it up that your wife has discovered that she's a lesbian and you're going to get a sex change operation. If they're not Liberals, they'll freak out.....
They're flaming, FLAMING libtards.
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They're flaming, FLAMING libtards.
If they thik it's a great idea, then ask for a loan for the operation, and take a nice vacation.
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Do either one of you have any critical physical defects that they would know about ?? IF not, then you could always tell them that both of y'all have joined the Army and have asked to be assigned to Afghanistan and that y'all will leave for basic training right after the holidays. If you have children, you could play it up by asking them to be their guardians for the duration.... :fuelfire:
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Do either one of you have any critical physical defects that they would know about ?? IF not, then you could always tell them that both of y'all have joined the Army and have asked to be assigned to Afghanistan and that y'all will leave for basic training right after the holidays. If you have children, you could play it up by asking them to be their guardians for the duration.... :fuelfire:
...and legally change my name to Ronald Reagan. :rotf:
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...and legally change my name to Ronald Reagan. :rotf:
I like this one. Though, the sex change one is good, too, because even though they're flaming libtards as you describe them, flaming libtards generally want other people's families to conform to their way of thinking.
'Course, you could stick with the Army enlistment/name change, but also tell them that your wife is changing hers to Elizabeth . . . Cheney . . .
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Call and say you'll be late to dinner, because you were arrested for drunk driving.
I like this! :naughty:
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Tell them you're out-of-state and that you've been detained by Homeland Security for refusing to be anally fisted by the TSA.
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I think you need to incorporate the Tea Party into it. I am going to give this some thought.
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They're flaming, FLAMING libtards.
Tell them you're bringing the bird this year courtesy of a hunting trip you went on with Dick Cheney and Uncle Ted! :-)
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You could say you made the short list of candidates in being considered for a focus group that studies the effects of long-term liberalism on Americans.
One of your proposals that has also made the short list is to study your own family.
That'll make 'em uncomfortable as hell.
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Call ahead and tell them you have something you need to show them and you'll show them when you get there. Show up dressed like a woman. Have your wife do you a good job on makeup and dressing you up. Tell them "I'm coming out. It's such a load off my mind after all these years." .....but forego the thong underwear and wear some granny panties...please.... :-)
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Call ahead and tell them you have something you need to show them and you'll show them when you get there. Show up dressed like a woman. Have your wife do you a good job on makeup and dressing you up. Tell them "I'm coming out. It's such a load off my mind after all these years." .....but forego the thong underwear and wear some granny panties...please.... :-)
Crotchless, though. You wanna give your boys some room to breathe. :-)
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Don't forget the garters and thigh highs if you do the woman thing
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Crotchless, though. You wanna give your boys some room to breathe. :-)
:cheersmate: :lmao:
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This prank thing is so much fun, last year for Xmas one of you gave me the idea to put money in a box and pour cement over it to make a brick the gifted had to break into.
This year, not for Thanksgiving but Xmas I need another idea that will drive them nuts.
I don't pull pranks at Thanksgivings as it is one of the few American Hollidays we have and we are there to remember all we as a nation have gone through to become who and what we are.
I just thank heavens that Ben Franklin did not get his way by making the turkey our national bird.
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I need an idea for a prank to retaliate for a prank that was pulled on my wife and her parents by her sister and boyfriend last year at Thanksgiving.
They thought it was funny to make everybody think they were going to have a baby together, and that one was already on the way.
I'm fishing for ideas here. Anyone has a particularly dastardly idea, throw it on me! :cheersmate:
Back in the day - when I worked for Bechtel at the nuke power plant in Richland, WA, a coworker (good beer drinking buddy) made posters of my head on the body of a "world renowned" accordion player that was playing in the area. He posted them EVERYWHERE in the 20 offices I worked in!
I had coworkers walking up to my desk saying, "I didn't know you played the accordion. I'll be there to watch your concert!
That dirty bastard! I can barely play a Jews Harp let alone an accordion.
Every town has one of those free small advert newspapers where you can cheaply advertise the private sale of your car, cat, used underwear, mother-in-law, and used stereo gear. In the Tri-Cities, WA where I lived, it was the Thrifty Nickle.
I bought an ad for an "All natural herbal colon-rectal cleansing service. We offer 8 different flavors including Jasmine, Basil, Sage, and many more. All natural, removes poisons from your body leaving you refreshed and empowered. All performed in the privacy of your home or in our discrete facility."
I added his name using his true first name of Mike but phonetically spelled his last name so as to change it. I added his home phone number as well.
The paper is released on Thursdays, that evening I gathered up about 25 copies of it, found the advert, circled it in red then took them to work with me the next day. I opened the paper to the circled advert page and dropped them throughout the break room and on tables and work areas throughout the office. He actually received about 10 calls at home inquiring about his "services".
It took him about two days to figure out who did this to him (ME!) and he never pranked me again yet I will say I love the guy and he is a great friend.
Early the next week the top-dog site manager for Bechtel, a vice president, shows up at my desk and in earshot of the 30 cubes in the office says, "that was the best joke/prank I have ever seen! DO NOT DO THAT AGAIN! As we do not want to make the wrong impression with our customer.
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:rofl: Good one.
Worst I ever took part in was disassembling somebody's desk and hiding the entire thing in the closet. Those Facilities guys are freaks. :rotf:
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I used to go to the pre-expended bin, grab a couple of low value capacitors, charge them up with a megger, and then go around the hangar, holding the capacitor by the body and would say, "Here, catch". Almost always, someone would grab it. Of course, I had the leads carefully located so that when a person caught it, they couldn't help but hit the leads, discharging the capacitor in their hand. :evillaugh:
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I used to go to the pre-expended bin, grab a couple of low value capacitors, charge them up with a megger, and then go around the hangar, holding the capacitor by the body and would say, "Here, catch". Almost always, someone would grab it. Of course, I had the leads carefully located so that when a person caught it, they couldn't help but hit the leads, discharging the capacitor in their hand. :evillaugh:
Har de freakin har--that was funny during the second week of "A" school, maybe.
Of course, nowadays that'd be enough to get your ass canned or time off at the very least.
Although it's always a hoot to go up to someone who has left their computer unlocked and put a whole bunch of "safe for work" but tasteless websites into their browser favorites, like the Obama campaign, gay magazines, the local anti-nuke groups, etc...
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Har de freakin har--that was funny during the second week of "A" school, maybe.
Of course, nowadays that'd be enough to get your ass canned or time off at the very least.
Although it's always a hoot to go up to someone who has left their computer unlocked and put a whole bunch of "safe for work" but tasteless websites into their browser favorites, like the Obama campaign, gay magazines, the local anti-nuke groups, etc...
I like the idea of doing a screencap of a persons desktop, then setting that picture as the backgound, and finally hide their desktop icons. The screencap makes it look like the icons are still there, but they won't work as shortcuts.
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Har de freakin har--that was funny during the second week of "A" school, maybe.
Of course, nowadays that'd be enough to get your ass canned or time off at the very least.
Although it's always a hoot to go up to someone who has left their computer unlocked and put a whole bunch of "safe for work" but tasteless websites into their browser favorites, like the Obama campaign, gay magazines, the local anti-nuke groups, etc...
We didn't have access to parts like that during A School. Yeah, I suppose that people wouldn't take it as very funny nowadays....... We didn't have desktop computers for most of my career. I think it was 85 before they really started using them and even then, there was no internet access. Although I use to tinker with my Division Chief's laptop, writing funny command line stuff that made it look like it was going to format the drive or silly stuff like that.
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Har de freakin har--that was funny during the second week of "A" school, maybe.
Of course, nowadays that'd be enough to get your ass canned or time off at the very least.
Although it's always a hoot to go up to someone who has left their computer unlocked and put a whole bunch of "safe for work" but tasteless websites into their browser favorites, like the Obama campaign, gay magazines, the local anti-nuke groups, etc...
In my electronics engineering school at Idaho State University, one of our lab projects was to build a D.C. power supply. We were handed a sheet of specs - typically 120V A.C. input and 12-15V D.C. output with an A.C. ripple of less than 'X'mV P-P as measured with a scope, and, a small bag of a few parts: Step-down transformer, ELECTROLYTIC (polarized capacitor), four diodes for the full-wave rectifier, and Zener diode for regulation. We had to choose out own parts from a parts bin for a pi filter.
A chick in my class - 35 years old, three times divorced, four kids, on a 100% free tuition, books and supplies, three bedroom off campus apartment, food, and spending cash ride courtesy the federal and state government WHICH she continually bragged about.
SHE WAS HELEN THOMAS BUTT UGLY TOO! I hated her guts, not because she was ugly, because she was downright MEAN with a poisonous attitude to boot. Everyone hated her - she was just sour.
LAB TIME!!!
She works on her power supply project through lunch for two days, bread-boarding, drawing schematics, recording her calculations as required, then announcing to the entire two 30 student classes in the lab that SHE was finished and ready to power-up her project.
Everyone gathers around - she powers-up the A.C. - the POLARIZED capacitor which was about 4" long and 1" in diameter, was connected BACKWARDS!!
As she hovers over hey 'project' with voltmeter probes in hand...
KA-BOOM!
She looks up, a cloud of smoke obscures her head, her long, greasy kinky blond hair FILLED with waxy capacitor dielectric paper confetti! I should have known something was up when the teacher, as pre-powered required, checked her connections, schematics, and calculations, then stepped back about 10', and said, "go ahead, fire it up!"
Holy shit! The ensuing laughter from EVERYONE was epic! She stormed out of the lab and didn't return for two days. We thought she dropped out.
Needless to say, her new name, coined be me of "Ka-Boom-Boom" stuck for the remaining semester!
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These are some great ideas! :cheersmate: I am going to use the capacitor one on my brother in law this Christmas. However, the wife, knowing her primitive family members better than any of us would dare to want to know, has hatched the best idea so far, and it only came to her tonight.
Around seven or eight months ago, through a mutual friend, we befriended and helped out a guy close to my age that was having a very hard time in life financially. He is one of the nicest people you would ever care to run into on the face of the earth. He has no family or friends (other than our mutual friend) in this area that he would wish to visit (a very long and sad story) for Thanksgiving, so we invited him to come and hang out with my side of the family for our typical all-day Thanksgiving bash.
We had to fit the wife's family in somewhere, and since she is about as enthused as I am about visiting them, we put them in at the beginning of the day to get the whole ordeal over with (as usual). After visiting her family, we were going pick up my friend, and go out to my parents. This is where the wife's plan come in:
Her family, being indistinguishable from the type of proto-human primitives you see parusing the DUmp on a daily basis, are also tolerant-in-spirit only types, which is to say that they are very, very tolerant of all types of shapes, sizes, and colors of their fellow man, so long as they are white caucasian. Most importantly, blacks and hispanics need not apply (in that order).
Now, all the wife suggested was that we call ahead to her parents, and make a tiny change to the order of things for the day; which is to say, pick up our friend first, instead of going to her family first. Her family has heard about our friend, and knows enough about him to be reasonably comfortable with having him over for dinner. The one tiny detail we never thought to mention to them before is that my friend is as black as a big old lump of coal.
Being the laid back type that my friend is, he is chomping at the bit to go. He plans on walking right up to the racist-in-charge (the wife's stepfather), and shaking his hand and introducing himself.
What will I do in the meantime? Try not to piss my pants waiting for Thanksgiving to arrive.
I will also take a camera with, to get some Thanksgiving photos, while I consider getting one framed to give to him in full view of the rest of his racist family during Christmas, and watch him squirm around his family when he sees that my friend is there, smiling, right along side of him.
This year's holidays are going to be great. :-)
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
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You'll need some higher voltage DC source other than a car battery...... A megohm meter works right well. (aka: megger)
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You people are amateurs:
SPARTANBURG COUNTY, S.C. -- In what was apparently a phone prank that has taken place in other parts of the country, a motel guest said someone called his room and told him to smash the things inside in order to free a "midget" trapped next door.
http://www.wxii12.com/news/25906753/detail.html