The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: thundley4 on May 15, 2010, 12:44:37 PM

Title: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: thundley4 on May 15, 2010, 12:44:37 PM
Quote
RC   (1000+ posts)           Fri May-14-10 11:09 PM
Original message
Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
   
If they think can stick a tube in the leaky pipe and fill a tanker...

Why can't they insert a "balloon" into the pipe and inflate it? If the pipe is too leaky, cut the pipe off before any leaks, then insert the "balloon". If nothing else, it will buy time for a more permanent fix.

Anyone else have a better idea, let's hear 'em?

Using nuclear explosives runs the risk of blowing the top off the oil dome and really making a mess. To say nothing about the leak being only 30 miles off shore. Tidal wave anyone?
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x8339141

The following picture has better ideas than the DUmp.

(http://cdn.holytaco.com/www/sites/default/files/images/2009/12/oil-spill.jpg)
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: LC EFA on May 15, 2010, 06:03:10 PM
I was thinking that we could get bunches of 100 DUmmies and bind them together with wire like a raft, then jam a few dozen of these rafts into the bore hole.

Might not stop the oil leak but it sure would be good value entertainment.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 15, 2010, 06:38:47 PM
Stuff Obama's ego down the pipe and tell him how super, awesomely wonderful he is.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: jinxmchue on May 15, 2010, 11:15:10 PM
I'm for the Sham-Wow solution.   :lmao:
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Chris_ on May 15, 2010, 11:55:57 PM
The giant tampon seems more appropriate.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: sofa king on May 16, 2010, 12:10:47 AM
i think we should stuff the cu member "soleil" into that opening.

soleil is so full of shit,  i think that all of that shit would probably contain this spill and probably every other spill ever know to mankind forever.

that is how full of shit soleil is...

*kiss*  soleil!



Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: diesel driver on May 16, 2010, 01:44:12 AM
I was thinking perhaps start 100-1000 MORE drilling rigs so they can relieve all that pressure that is causing the oil to leak out of the pipe to begin with....   
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: The Village Idiot on May 16, 2010, 01:46:08 AM
I was thinking perhaps start 100-1000 MORE drilling rigs so they can relieve all that pressure that is causing the oil to leak out of the pipe to begin with....   

Sounds very plausible to me. We should test the theory first though, we need chicken wire and a brick.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: diesel driver on May 16, 2010, 01:50:56 AM
Sounds very plausible to me. We should test the theory first though, we need chicken wire and a brick.

I don't know about testing.  Maybe we should forgo the testing and "Just Do It!"  Time is of the essence, life on the earth as we know it is in jeopardy....

Besides, it's hard to start a fire underwater....
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: sofa king on May 16, 2010, 02:15:47 AM
hummm...

i've been noodling this for a while....

i think, and i may be wrong, but i think, bobo the hobo is our answer here.

who stops all conversation on du?  bobo the hobo.

who expands to fill all of the voids in dummyland?  stopping all post?  bobo the hobo...



what if we were to inject bobo the hobo, physically inject bobo the hobo into the gaping maw that is the oil spill...

the oil spill would retract, because who could confront an actual "homeless" person...   especially one of bobo's  persona... 

"did you know bobo the hobo was homeless"?"

i know?

it would be over....



Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 16, 2010, 05:48:03 AM
Stuff Obama's ego down the pipe and tell him how super, awesomely wonderful he is.

That might do it.  Though, I like sofa king's suggestion about Bobbo the Hobo.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: jinxmchue on May 16, 2010, 01:28:10 PM
Have any of the Wiccan, mother earth-worshiping nitwits chimed in yet?  Maybe they can contain the oil with their magic spells.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Tucker on May 16, 2010, 03:56:36 PM
Sounds very plausible to me. We should test the theory first though, we need chicken wire and a brick.

Haven't you heard. A garden hose will do the trick.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Duchess on May 16, 2010, 06:22:06 PM
I was wondering if any of th
Have any of the Wiccan, mother earth-worshiping nitwits chimed in yet?  Maybe they can contain the oil with their magic spells.

I was wondering if any of them had mentioned the all-powerful healing white light yet, or the more prosaic but still useful pictures of hands, possibly in the "stop" gesture, accompanied by visualisations of the oil flow stopping, of course. It won't work without the visualisations.

Or maybe, chicken wire.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Wineslob on May 17, 2010, 02:39:00 PM
I think Mikey Moore is just the right size..........
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: diesel driver on May 17, 2010, 05:32:22 PM
I think Mikey Moore is just the right size..........

Only problem is you'd have to bring him up every 15 minutes to feed his fat a$$....
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 17, 2010, 07:46:46 PM
Only problem is you'd have to bring him up every 15 minutes to feed his fat a$$....

Not with concrete shoes weighing in at 20 tons . . . each . . .
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on May 18, 2010, 08:37:42 AM
Quote
Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
A giant wine cork and a shitload of duct tape? :-)
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Wineslob on May 18, 2010, 09:42:55 AM
Only problem is you'd have to bring him up every 15 minutes to feed his fat a$$....

Who said anything about that?     :evillaugh:
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Cathman on May 31, 2010, 02:17:30 AM
Use the weight of a long rod hanging in the well to seal a plug at the top of the blowout preventer.  Cut the pipe at the top of the blowout preventer and insert a long rod with a plug at the top of it.  The rod is long enough to supply the forces needed to seal the well.  A rod at 1/3rd the diameter of the well (should be small enough to insert into the gushing hole) would have to hang down a mile to generate a 2000 psi seal at the blowout preventer.  If the rod could be ½ the diameter of the well, it would only have to hang about ½ a mile down to generate 2000 psi.  It’s pretty simple to try.  They are cutting the top off the preventer anyway.  It’s low risk too, and I’m sure the materials are readily available.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: miskie on May 31, 2010, 06:59:41 AM
I was thinking along a similar line  - drop a large heavy rod in the well, however, every couple hundred yards, weld a thicker rod to the end until it eventually plugs the hole. Gravity should be able to overcome the PSI issue down there. Once its plugged, get a rig to pound the rod further in.








edit- replaced 'pipe' with 'rod'
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: acesking50 on June 11, 2010, 07:30:23 AM
If BP starts pulling the pipe out of the ocean floor, it seems to me that one of two things will happen.  First, the hole that will occur by extracting the pipe will collapse and reseal the oil.  Second, the pipe can be raised to a shallower level where repairs can be more easily completed.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Wineslob on June 11, 2010, 10:47:54 AM
If BP starts pulling the pipe out of the ocean floor, it seems to me that one of two things will happen.  First, the hole that will occur by extracting the pipe will collapse and reseal the oil.  Second, the pipe can be raised to a shallower level where repairs can be more easily completed.

It don't work that way.
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 05:05:58 PM
Before I even read this, I know this is going to be hilarious!!!!
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: moko on June 11, 2010, 06:24:28 PM
Stuff it full of wedding cake and it will quite putting out almost immediately
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: Chris_ on June 11, 2010, 06:39:20 PM
:rofl:

I'm stealing that. :-)
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 07:04:16 PM
The giant tampon seems more appropriate.

As long as the tampons are made of "sham wow!"............hehe
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 07:10:52 PM
If BP starts pulling the pipe out of the ocean floor, it seems to me that one of two things will happen.  First, the hole that will occur by extracting the pipe will collapse and reseal the oil.  Second, the pipe can be raised to a shallower level where repairs can be more easily completed.

Don't tell me, you're a DUmpster Diver, ain't ya?

Not to worry, if you do that, the pressure causing the leak in the first place will just disappear! Idiot!
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 11, 2010, 07:15:17 PM
Stuff it full of wedding cake and it will quite putting out almost immediately

Or, alternately, put a wedding ring on it and it'll stop putting out in a month.

I had a friend of mine, who is a Dem-leaning transportation lobbyist in Albany, tell me that one today.  He said that he was probably not going to tell that one to his wife. :hammer:
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 07:30:40 PM
Or, alternately, put a wedding ring on it and it'll stop putting out in a month.

I had a friend of mine, who is a Dem-leaning transportation lobbyist in Albany, tell me that one today.  He said that he was probably not going to tell that one to his wife. :hammer:

"Toots" told me she married me so she wouldn't have to give blow jobs any more!

You can take that for what it's worth, but I have to tell ya, they sure slowed down to a crawl!

And if she ever reads this, they will be non-existent!
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 11, 2010, 07:36:11 PM
"Toots" told me she married me so she wouldn't have to give blow jobs any more!

You can take that for what it's worth, but I have to tell ya, they sure slowed down to a crawl!

And if she ever reads this, they will be non-existent!

 :bolt: :bolt: :bolt:
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 07:44:00 PM
:bolt: :bolt: :bolt:

I'm pretty safe, she's gone to her sister's to help her move this weekend! nervous laugh
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: PatriotGame on June 11, 2010, 09:07:26 PM
I'm for the Sham-Wow solution.   :lmao:

Like this?

"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"

WOW!!

[youtube=425,350]LV6puTS14Ho[/youtube]


...or this:

[youtube=425,350]vm03Dgu_yXA[/youtube]

...or better yet this:

[youtube=425,350]nMMxIAn_76g[/youtube]
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: PatriotGame on June 11, 2010, 09:30:14 PM
Stuff it full of wedding cake and it will quite putting out almost immediately
White cake or dark chocolate cake?
It makes a difference ya know...
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 09:37:23 PM
Quote
Ignore
   
   
Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
« Reply #32 on: Today at 06:07:26 pm »
   
Reply with quoteQuote
Quote from: jinxmchue on May 15, 2010, 08:15:10 pm
I'm for the Sham-Wow solution.   

Like this?

"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"


"this is for the house
the car
the boat
the RV"

WOW!!




...or this:



...or better yet this:

wonder why they took the embed off, heh!
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: PatriotGame on June 11, 2010, 10:20:37 PM

"Toots" told me she married me so she wouldn't have to give blow jobs any more!

You can take that for what it's worth, but I have to tell ya, they sure slowed down to a crawl!


Maybe she has an aversion to miniature replicas...or...nano technology... :bolt:  :tongue: :-) :tongue:
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 11, 2010, 11:56:27 PM
Maybe she has an aversion to miniature replicas...or...nano technology... :bolt:  :tongue: :-) :tongue:

Funny!!!!!!!!! Actually, she always told me it was to big to eat!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: PatriotGame on June 12, 2010, 12:35:31 AM
Funny!!!!!!!!! Actually, she always told me it was to big to eat!!!!!!!!!!
I COULD say I can FULLY imagine, via a mental image, what you are implying but no fracking way in this forum.
What semi-rational man would ever do so?
Title: Re: Post your ideas for stopping the Gulf oil leak.
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 12, 2010, 12:58:14 PM
I COULD say I can FULLY imagine, via a mental image, what you are implying but no fracking way in this forum.
What semi-rational man would ever do so?

I hope none! The gals on the other hand..........( pun intended )