The Conservative Cave

The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: bijou on April 29, 2010, 12:50:42 PM

Title: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: bijou on April 29, 2010, 12:50:42 PM
Quote
An inmate in a state prison was hospitalized and needed emergency surgery to remove a hot-sauce bottle he apparently had used as a sex device.

Taxpayers will end up paying the prisoner's medical bills, expected to run into the thousands of dollars.

The Ohio Department of Rehabilitation and Correction won't release the name of the inmate, citing federal regulations regarding the privacy of medical records.

However, a report by the State Highway Patrol, which initially investigated the incident as a rape case, said an inmate at the Noble Correctional Facility in Caldwell was taken to Marietta General Hospital on Sunday evening after saying he had been sexually assaulted in the shower by another prisoner.

The injured inmate later acknowledged that he had not been assaulted, but on his own had inserted the hot-sauce bottle anally, sources said. ...
link (http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/local_news/stories/2010/04/28/surgeons-extricate-hot-sauce-bottle-from-state-inmate.html?sid=101)
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on April 29, 2010, 04:16:52 PM
Doc Flamer's Liquid Lava Sauce, now in convenient suppository form!  Why wait 12 hours for a case of the burning shits?

 :lmao:
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: rich_t on April 29, 2010, 04:21:46 PM
I suppose he thought he was pretty hot shit eh?
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: Hawkgirl on April 29, 2010, 05:29:36 PM
 :-)
(http://i39.tinypic.com/5jw4km.jpg)
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: thundley4 on April 29, 2010, 06:20:24 PM
:-)
(http://i39.tinypic.com/5jw4km.jpg)


That looks more like a coke bottle.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on April 29, 2010, 06:28:46 PM
That looks more like a coke bottle.
Mrs. Butterworth could not be reached for comment.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: Hawkgirl on April 29, 2010, 06:38:02 PM
That looks more like a coke bottle.

it is
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: vesta111 on April 29, 2010, 07:12:54 PM
it is

There is a site that shows what had been removed from men's colons some where on line.  I cannot help you find it, it is up to you.

Some how I came across it following links and it is a Hoot.  Problem is these men for some Gods knows reason chose some very dangerous stuff to stuff up there.

Carrots are no problem as are most vegetables.

Hammers, screwdrivers and cans of hair spray can be a problem.

Worse problem seems to be a light bulb of any kind.  If the screw in end is inserted first then extracting the bulb may need major surgery. :popcorn:  :evillaugh:
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: littlelamb on April 30, 2010, 12:20:24 AM
Reminds me of a commercial I heard on the way home where this granny was talking about Franks Hot Sauce and how she puts that Shit on Everything guess he took that as a hint for his cell mate :evillaugh:
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: Lacarnut on April 30, 2010, 12:29:29 AM
It should be extracted without any anesthesia or pain medication. Next time, he will think about what his @sshole is made for.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: Mike220 on April 30, 2010, 09:20:05 AM
It should be extracted without any anesthesia or pain medication. Next time, he will think about what his @sshole is made for.

His cellie...
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 30, 2010, 10:01:39 AM
His cellie...

Careful . . . someone might translate that as "his cello" and you'd have a whole new picture.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: asdf2231 on April 30, 2010, 10:09:48 AM
it is

So when did you have that x-ray taken?    :whistling:
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: The Village Idiot on April 30, 2010, 12:35:42 PM
How about an eel??

 this guy died.

http://dailycaller.com/2010/04/30/man-dies-after-having-eel-inserting-in-rectum-during-a-prank-gone-awry/
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: bijou on April 30, 2010, 01:21:19 PM
How about an eel??

 this guy died.

http://dailycaller.com/2010/04/30/man-dies-after-having-eel-inserting-in-rectum-during-a-prank-gone-awry/
Ewww. Good job he was very drunk and insensible when it happened.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: Wineslob on April 30, 2010, 04:21:34 PM
In-Mate Hot Sauce?
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: crockspot on May 03, 2010, 06:19:28 PM
How about an eel??

 this guy died.

http://dailycaller.com/2010/04/30/man-dies-after-having-eel-inserting-in-rectum-during-a-prank-gone-awry/

There is also the famous case of the guy who died after allowing a horse to have his way with his anus... I won't post a link, but it is pretty easy to find.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: The Village Idiot on May 03, 2010, 06:44:41 PM
There is also the famous case of the guy who died after allowing a horse to have his way with his anus... I won't post a link, but it is pretty easy to find.

dude. They have websites for that. I used gallons of mind bleach after encountering those.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 03, 2010, 06:49:15 PM
There is also the famous case of the guy who died after allowing a horse to have his way with his anus...

Let me guess . . . He was challenging Olbermann for "The Biggest Asshole" . . . and thought it meant it literally.
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: NHSparky on May 03, 2010, 07:12:31 PM
Goodness, Gracious, GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!!!!
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 04, 2010, 10:40:22 AM
Goodness, Gracious, GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!!!!

That's the front end, Sparky . . .
Title: Re: Surgeons extricate hot-sauce bottle from state inmate
Post by: bijou on May 04, 2010, 11:02:56 AM
Goodness, Gracious, GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!!!!
Great Bowels of Fire, surely?