The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: GOBUCKS on March 26, 2010, 09:23:06 PM

Title: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: GOBUCKS on March 26, 2010, 09:23:06 PM
America is still the land of opportunity. There are literally millions of great jobs and career opportunities, even in tough economic times like today. So, did you ever wonder why DUmmies are consistently, always, absolute losers? You'd think that sometimes, even if just by accident, a DUmmy wouldn't be able to avoid falling into a great situation. Kind of like Jesse James marrying Sandra Bullock. But it never happens, just as DUmmy TwixVoy can't  hold a job as a Target clerk, can't hold a job as a trainee cable installer, can't do without dope long enough to pass a urine test for a job at the air  port, DUmmies always, and I mean always, screw up. Of course, most don't want jobs, but the few who do always come to grief. It's unheard of for a DUmmy to have a successful career. Case in point is DUmmy LeftyFingerPop, who claims to have scored an interview with one of the great American companies:
Quote
LeftyFingerPop  (1000+ posts)      Fri Mar-26-10 08:29 PM
Original message
I think that I just ****ed up my interview with Procter & Gamble...*******IT!!
I traveled over 1000 miles to interview for a senior Marketing Director position.

I'll admit, I was a little nervous.

His FIRST question...define "irony".

Jesus Christ! Think about being asked that question on the spur of the moment!

My response was "I can't define it, but I know it when I see it".

He kind of chuckled and said "very good".

Then he said "OK, come up with a marketing plan for our Febreze air freshener.

I froze. I was like a deer in the headlights.

Finally, after about 45 seconds, I blurted out "Well, your company should make marijuana scented Febreze and the target demographic could be college kids who live in dorm rooms so they could spray it around the room whenever they happen to be not smoking pot".

The guy just stared at me, so I gave him my standard response in these situations..."What's the ****ing problem"?
 
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x9308823
As a longtime investor in P&G, it causes me some concern that the company could be so misguided as to consider a DUmbass for a management job.


To make DUmmy LFP feel better, DUmmy HFPS, one of the most despicable of the entire troop of DUmpmonkeys, makes up a bouncy lie:
Quote
HiFructosePronSyrup  (1000+ posts)      Fri Mar-26-10 08:36 PM
Response to Original message
Beats the time the cop ask me if I knew how fast I was going and I told him "doing your mom."
 
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: Chris on March 26, 2010, 09:39:10 PM
Quote
Finally, after about 45 seconds, I blurted out "Well, your company should make marijuana scented Febreze and the target demographic could be college kids who live in dorm rooms so they could spray it around the room whenever they happen to be not smoking pot".

The guy just stared at me, so I gave him my standard response in these situations..."What's the ****ing problem"?

You traveled 1,000 to prove to a complete stranger what a dumbass you are?  Congratulations.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: NHSparky on March 26, 2010, 09:40:34 PM
Moreover, P&G likely paid for the plane ticket and hotel.

Gawd, what an ass.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: Carl on March 26, 2010, 09:42:10 PM
OMG...I really did LOL reading that.

I mean beyond belief stupidity that there really isn`t a good definition for. :rotf:
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: BEG on March 26, 2010, 10:14:02 PM
Why on earth would someone even admit to saying that?  I don't believe it happened.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: miskie on March 26, 2010, 10:15:03 PM
this has to be some lame attempt at a joke...

Its Sitcom lame.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: USA4ME on March 26, 2010, 10:25:08 PM
Quote from:
LeftyFingerPop 

I think ...

Not really.

.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on March 27, 2010, 05:30:49 AM
Senior Anything Director strikes me as the kind of job you would have a reasonable idea of what to expect before ever walking into an interview because one cannot climb the ranks to get to within striking distance of such a spot without first spending years watching others.

He either lied, inflating his resume, to get the interview and was shown to be a fraud or he is so amazingly incompetent it never struck him that a Fortune 500 company might want to know how a senior marketing director might choose to position their products.

P&G dodged a serious bullet this week. Good on 'em.

 :cheersmate:

Imma go buy me an air freshener.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: Texacon on March 27, 2010, 08:28:19 AM
LFP is trying to be funny or ..... something.  There is no way (not even a DUmmy) would say that in an interview.  LFP is just trying to get its name over here so it can be famous.

And

Quote
HiFructosePronSyrup  (1000+ posts)      Fri Mar-26-10 08:36 PM
Response to Original message
Beats the time the cop ask me if I knew how fast I was going and I told him "doing your mom."

WTF does that even mean??   :mental:

KC
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: NHSparky on March 27, 2010, 09:15:11 AM
Drunk posting--it never ends well.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: GOBUCKS on March 27, 2010, 10:56:22 AM
LFP is trying to be funny or ..... something.  There is no way (not even a DUmmy) would say that in an interview. 
Don't be too sure of that. I know a couple of people who once entered a meeting room where an interviewee was waiting, and found the interviewee spending the time by, uh, pleasuring himself.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: Texacon on March 27, 2010, 11:40:06 AM
Don't be too sure of that. I know a couple of people who once entered a meeting room where an interviewee was waiting, and found the interviewee spending the time by, uh, pleasuring himself.

 :rotf:

I was interviewing a bunch of people one day.  They were short 5 minute interviews to weed out a bunch of applicants then I would make my call backs for the longer more intense interview.  I walked out into the lobby to call my next vict ... applicant and he was NECKING with his GIRLFRIEND who was also an applicant.  I don't mean little pecks, I'm talking tongue down her throat, almost on top of her in her chair ...

I asked them both to leave.

KC
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: The Village Idiot on March 27, 2010, 11:45:44 AM
2 way mirror (or a hidden camera), just watch them sit alone for 5 minutes.

You can probably get rid of a lot of bad applicants that way.
Title: Re: DUmmy LeftyFingerPop Demostrates How A Born Loser Loses
Post by: Ree on March 27, 2010, 02:10:45 PM
2 way mirror (or a hidden camera), just watch them sit alone for 5 minutes.

You can probably get rid of a lot of bad applicants that way.
Now I'll be thinkin about that on my next interview....