The Conservative Cave

The Bar => Comedy Central => Topic started by: Golem on November 08, 2009, 06:18:45 PM

Title: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Golem on November 08, 2009, 06:18:45 PM
President Barack Hussein Obama announced that he wanted to invite Islamic terrorist Nidal Malik Hasan, who murdered 13 people and wounded 31 others, to a beer summit at the White House with himself and Sgt. Kimberly Munley, the heroine who stopped the shooting, so that Hasan and Munley could “work out their differences.” Obama declared, “Although I do not condone Mr. Hasan’s attack, I do believe that his behavior can be excused due to American imperialism and anti-Islamic bigotry. I also believe that Ms. Munley acted stupidly in shooting Mr. Hasan instead of trying to talk to him and understand his oppression. Both parties did wrong in this incident, and it is my sincere belief that Hasan and Munley are moral equals. However, it is my hope that out of this tragedy can come a teachable moment for America, one where all parties can walk away with a positive lesson learned from this incident, and I believe that my beer summit can do just that.”

A date for the summit has not yet been set, as Munley and Hasan are both still in hospital recovering from their wounds. There is also no word yet on which beer will be served at the summit, although experts are predicting that it will be a non-alcoholic beer, in accordance with the Islamic prohibition on drinking alcohol. In addition, experts are saying that no pictures of the three together will be taken, as Hasan objects to having his picture taken with women.



(The author wishes to remain anonymous.)
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Chris_ on November 08, 2009, 06:24:27 PM
Consider this stolen, Golem. :II:  I got some moonbat associates who's heads just might ass'plode when I show this to 'em.

Thanks, sir.
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Gratiot on November 08, 2009, 06:39:41 PM
 :rotf:
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Ptarmigan on November 08, 2009, 11:09:23 PM
Too funny!  :lmao:
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Mike220 on November 08, 2009, 11:25:22 PM
That's funny, but sad that we have precedent to base it off of.

Never thought we'd have such a tool for a President.  :beer:
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: NHSparky on November 09, 2009, 08:38:46 AM
It'd be a hell of a lot funnier if it weren't so freakin true.
Title: Re: Obama Announces Beer Summit For Terrorist, Heroine
Post by: Eupher on November 09, 2009, 03:47:32 PM
I smell a caramelizing Onion....