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Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: GOBUCKS on August 27, 2009, 09:31:24 PM

Title: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: GOBUCKS on August 27, 2009, 09:31:24 PM
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LLStarks  (265 posts)      Thu Aug-27-09 09:36 PM
Original message
Is Kennedy actually in that casket at the library? It's really short...
I only ask this because I've seen other flag-draped coffins lying in state and they've all appeared much longer than Kennedy's. I don't remember him being that short of a guy.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x6407250
The guy in the coffin is Ken Lay.

Quote
gmoney  (1000+ posts)        Thu Aug-27-09 09:39 PM
1. well, he was a pretty wide guy...
might have to be a little wider coffin, so it would look shorter maybe...
No offense, I'm sure I'll need one someday.

Also, the ones you see in some photos may look elongated due to wide angle lenses.

It's a really, really wide coffin.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/eliot/foot-wide-hot-dog-26q
 
DUmmy nadinbrzezinski, a distant relative of Joe Bfstplk (D-Dogpatch), is the most
arrogant DUmmy in the DUmp, and among the most obnoxious. Very arrogant for
a Polish wetback D&D mistress:
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nadinbrzezinski  (1000+ posts)        Thu Aug-27-09 09:42 PM
2. That is the reason, the lens
I feel sorry for the honor guard. yes it sucks... it is an honor, but it sucks to a point. 

I agree with her that it sucks. It made me sick to see the military honor guard carrying
that drunken shithead's coffin, after he spent his worthless life doing all he could to damage
the U.S. military and the country they protect.

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cliffordu  (1000+ posts)        Thu Aug-27-09 09:57 PM
8. I love questions germaine to the discussion about Ted.
This piece of shit 'question' might scrape off the shoe in an hour or two, or when the Pizza arrives.
Or after that piece of shit is buried.
 
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Judi Lynn  (1000+ posts)      Thu Aug-27-09 09:58 PM
9. At some point you might reconsider sharing everything that comes to your "mind." 
There are some ideas simply not interesting enough, nor intelligent enough.

If DUmmies observed that rule, the DUmp would cease to exist.
 
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MercutioATC  (1000+ posts)        Thu Aug-27-09 10:00 PM
10. They sawed his legs off! Funeral home scandal!!
   
 
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undeterred  (1000+ posts)        Thu Aug-27-09 10:00 PM
11. Don't you know what they do in order to
Oh, never mind. 
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: ColonialMarine0431 on August 27, 2009, 09:45:22 PM
Exclusive TMZ photo of Blutto being hoisted to the mortuary for embalment.

(http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y53/ColonialMarine/Kennedy/ted_Kennedy.jpg)
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: franksolich on August 27, 2009, 09:53:06 PM
By the way, Associated Press dispatches the morning of the Event, reported that two hearses--not one, not two but one another sort of vehicle, but two--pulled up to the Kennedy compound when the body was taken away.

Why two?  For one corpse?

What gives here?
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: ColonialMarine0431 on August 27, 2009, 09:58:23 PM
The second one was for his ego and all the bullsh*t he spewed out for all those years.

Just a guess....
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: jukin on August 27, 2009, 09:58:33 PM
Insert own joke here.
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: The Village Idiot on August 28, 2009, 12:04:32 AM
Do they make caskets that big? I thought they would bury him in a porta potty or his private plane or something
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: GOBUCKS on August 28, 2009, 12:08:06 AM
Do they make caskets that big? I thought they would bury him in a porta potty or his private plane or something
How about an Oldsmobile sedan?
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: The Village Idiot on August 28, 2009, 01:07:04 AM
How about an Oldsmobile sedan?

might work if you cut out the backseat backs so his fat knees and feet could go into the trunk
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: diesel driver on August 28, 2009, 01:07:51 AM
How about an Oldsmobile sedan?

That's what I was thinking, or at least, use one for his headstone....
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: JohnnyReb on August 28, 2009, 03:57:47 AM
Insert own joke here.

Believe I will....mods might move it tho because it's a little dirty.

A man, much like vast Teddy died. He was having sex with one of his many "other women" when he died. When they got him to the funeral home and were preparing him for burial, his rather large male member was standing straight up. They couldn't get it down no way they tried...and therefore they couldn't close the casket. So they finally called his wife to ask what she thought should be done. Her response was, "Cut it off and stick it up his ass, that's the only hole in town it hasn't been in."
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: Ree on August 28, 2009, 08:02:35 AM
Believe I will....mods might move it tho because it's a little dirty.

A man, much like vast Teddy died. He was having sex with one of his many "other women" when he died. When they got him to the funeral home and were preparing him for burial, his rather large male member was standing straight up. They couldn't get it down no way they tried...and therefore they couldn't close the casket. So they finally called his wife to ask what she thought should be done. Her response was, "Cut it off and stick it up his ass, that's the only hole in town it hasn't been in."
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
Title: Re: DUmmies Discuss Cramming Fat Ted In A Casket
Post by: lastparker on August 28, 2009, 08:45:33 AM
From the suject line on, this is one of the funniest threads evah.