The Conservative Cave
The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: mamacags on July 11, 2009, 04:41:30 PM
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My daughter who just turned 11 seems to think that I should be required to feed her 3 hot meals a day all summer long. She is not starving by any means. She knows how to work a can opener, microwave, toaster, and spoon. She knows where all of the sandwich supplies are. Am I a bad mom to think that she can make herself a sandwich for lunch or a bowl of cereal for breakfast? I cook supper every day and make sure it is a good and balanced meal.
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I vote "crack the whip". Make your own lunch, lazy kids! It's not like they don't have the time.
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We had four kids. Do what I did one summer. Clean out the fridge. Buy a head of lettuce, a pack of weiners, a bunch of carrots, and a thing of buns. Then put a post-it on the door that says, "See You In September".
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My daughter who just turned 11 seems to think that I should be required to feed her 3 hot meals a day all summer long. She is not starving by any means. She knows how to work a can opener, microwave, toaster, and spoon. She knows where all of the sandwich supplies are. Am I a bad mom to think that she can make herself a sandwich for lunch or a bowl of cereal for breakfast? I cook supper every day and make sure it is a good and balanced meal.
Have you asked her to help prepare whatever meal it is at the time? Maybe she wants some extra time with you.
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When my kids took the attitude that I owed them ___________(clean clothes, clean dishes, meals, etc.), they immediately received a lesson in "How to run the __________" and were then responsible for doing so a certain number of times, or times per week, or for themselves forever. They were normally in the 12 to 13 year age range when they talked themselves into 100% responsibility for their clothing, and closer to 10 or 11 when they became responsible for anything from their own meals on occasion to a full supper for the family. :-)
Just for comparison, when I was 10 and my brother 8, my grandmother died and my mother took my 6 year old brother and went to the funeral...in Austria...for more than a week. My dad was working 80 hours per week at that time, so my brother and I took care of the house, the basic farm chores, 35 dogs and 2 litters of puppies...and we managed to feed everything including ourselves. I have no sympathy for fully capable kids... :-) :-)
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When my kids took the attitude that I owed them ___________(clean clothes, clean dishes, meals, etc.), they immediately received a lesson in "How to run the __________" and were then responsible for doing so a certain number of times, or times per week, or for themselves forever. They were normally in the 12 to 13 year age range when they talked themselves into 100% responsibility for their clothing, and closer to 10 or 11 when they became responsible for anything from their own meals on occasion to a full supper for the family. :-)
Just for comparison, when I was 10 and my brother 8, my grandmother died and my mother took my 6 year old brother and went to the funeral...in Austria...for more than a week. My dad was working 80 hours per week at that time, so my brother and I took care of the house, the basic farm chores, 35 dogs and 2 litters of puppies...and we managed to feed everything including ourselves. I have no sympathy for fully capable kids... :-) :-)
Isn't that something else? I was sent up to the local Giant store about 3/4 of a mile away by 11, a couple times a week, to get things my mother needed to cook with. I also remember her getting complications from ulcers when I was around 10 and my brother was 4 and my dad would leave us alone for several hours while he visited her or worked here and there. I remember thinking I was the sh*t when I made peanut butter sandwiches and apple slices for my brother and I for lunch! I've let my daughter make her breakfast and sometimes lunch for about the last school year now. She almost exclusively makes her breakfast before school(when it is in session) and when she asks now I usually will make it since I figure she just wants some extra parent care/love in the form of me making the food that am since she only asks here and there at this point.
My 9 year old autistic son is even starting to understand how to work things like the toaster and the microwave. I figure he's on track to be fairly proficient at the same. Only problem is because he is so focused he forgets things like putting away the milk, bread, etc and concentrates ONLY on the food he's making.
So the answer is no, bar any handicap that keeps the child from using their arms or processing the idea of safety issues, 11 is not too young to make themselves breakfast and lunch. It's a good time too to include them in cooking on the stovetop to get used to that for later imo.
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Don't feel bad. My 17 year old brother in law still throws a fit when his mom won't make him food. ::)
Oh... and I had to select a real answer in the poll. You forgot the Jooooooooosss!!!!!! option.
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Flawed poll. Any time there's a Ron Paul option, there must be a "Jooooooos" option as well.
ETA: Dammit, djones! Beat me to it by a millisecond.
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:evillaugh:
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Don't feel bad. My 17 year old brother in law still throws a fit when his mom won't make him food. ::)
Oh... and I had to select a real answer in the poll. You forgot the Jooooooooosss!!!!!! option.
Have you heard ACC complain about her step-family when it comes to food? Funniest damn thing ever.
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Shoot. She ought be bringing YOU a sandwich once in awhile. Prepare her for marriage. :evillaugh:
Seriously, when I was 11, I had to not only make my own breakfast and lunch, I had to help start dinner PLUS wash my own clothes.
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:evillaugh:
10 or 11 I was walking to the store for stuff.
I remember the parental units, ha, used to give us a dollar for some reason... we had free lunch... and we would go to a Jewel T store after school and buy a box of brownies and a ton of 10 cent no-name canned root beer. Then we walked across a busy street and recycled the cans at the CanBank and went back to Jewel T and bought some more cheap no-name root beer.
Most of got fat, btw =o)
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What are these "Hot meals" of which you speak, strange one?
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What are these "Hot meals" of which you speak, strange one?
MRE heaters. I think. Or maybe you old-timers can just light off some C4. Unfortunately, both are atmospheric contaminants on submarines.
Cold canned ravioli and bug juice, ya bastards! Ah, the memories.
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My youngest daughter just turned 12. I will come from work and she will be putting dinner on the table. Her specialty is pasta with HOMEMADE pasta gravy that SHE spent the day cooking.
Point is, the 11 year old can fend for herself just fine.
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MRE heaters. I think. Or maybe you old-timers can just light off some C4. Unfortunately, both are atmospheric contaminants on submarines.
Cold canned ravioli and bug juice, ya bastards! Ah, the memories.
What kind of kids are we raising today.?
I hear the old " but their just kids, let them enjoy 12-15 years of no responcilibities as they will have a good 60 years of adulthood."----BS.
This idea goes way back in time to the very wealthy who had little problem raising kids as there was a Nanny there for the kids to supervise and train them.
The intire reason for childhood is to prepare children to handle life as an adult. Any 18 month child can be taught to put a toy away before bed time. Start with just one and as they age it will become a habit.
Any child over 3 years old will learn to carry their dirty clothing to a basket in the laundry room. this will become a habit.
If you do this for these children ,they learn you are their survent ,and find ways to controll you.
What a hard time we had teaching 4 year olds to tie their shoes, today there is velcro and the kids miss out on manual dextriety. Much easier on the kids and parents to forgo that choir until the kids are 32 years old.
A 5 year old should know how to pour milk over a bowl of cereal. open a jar pf peanut butter and spread it on bread.
At the age of 8 years old, kids that go into Scouting learn to sew a button on their shirt, badges on uniforms, and repair a rip in their jeans.
Childhood is preparing for survival in the world of adults, giving them the tools to survive once they hit 18.
At 11 years of age any male or female should have been educated in fire prevention, what to do if the house catches fire. When to call 911 and when not to.
So you walk into your kids bedroom and it is a disaster, not the kids fault, they expect their servents--parents --to releave them from all responcibility as they were never been taught different.
Childhood is all about learning to function in the world they are going into.
So called lowly anamils teach their babys to hunt, fish and survive for the time they must leave the den.
Are we humans delebertly trying to make our children unable to face life without us ???
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Kids should absolutely learn to do for themselves every now and then.
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Yes, an 11 can prepare their own meals. But, I'm 24, and I get bored if I eat cereal and sandwiches every day, and sometimes if nothing else is available, I just won't eat until I can get something else. Maybe find some more complicated recipes that she can make for herself, teach her how to use left overs in a salad, how to use the waffle iron, how to cook eggs, etc. so that she can eat something different when she feels like it. She's old enough to learn how to really cook if she doesn't know how already.
Also, eating alone can be boring too. Maybe have her help cook for a family breakfast, or family lunch, from time to time.
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My daughter who just turned 11 seems to think that I should be required to feed her 3 hot meals a day all summer long. She is not starving by any means. She knows how to work a can opener, microwave, toaster, and spoon. She knows where all of the sandwich supplies are. Am I a bad mom to think that she can make herself a sandwich for lunch or a bowl of cereal for breakfast? I cook supper every day and make sure it is a good and balanced meal.
My 9 and 11 year old boys do their own laundry! So you can guess how I voted! :evillaugh: :-)