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Current Events => Politics => Topic started by: dutch508 on March 04, 2009, 05:54:04 PM

Title: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: dutch508 on March 04, 2009, 05:54:04 PM
anncoulter.com

OLBERMANN'S PLASTIC IVY
March 4, 2009

Fortunately, we have Keith Olbermann to point out that Rush Limbaugh did not accurately quote the preamble to the Constitution in his CPAC speech last weekend. I'm not sure what scam Olbermann imagined Rush was trying to put over on the American people by saying conservatives believed in the "preamble to the Constitution" and then quoting words from the Declaration of Independence -- but Olbermann put an end to that cruel deception!

These small-time opportunities to show off by correcting someone else's teeny-tiny mistakes are the lifeblood of Olbermann's MSNBC show, "Countdown." Olbermann is no more capable of not correcting Rep. Charlie Rangel when he said "inferred," but meant "implied," than an obsessive compulsive could pass a sink without washing his hands.

There is utterly no purpose to these lame "gotchas," except that Olbermann is so desperately insecure that he is willing to waste valuable airtime in order to convince other status-conscious idiots that he is, like, scary-smart.

Olbermann relentlessly attacked low-level Bush administration employee Monica Goodling for not going to a name-dropping college, saying -- approximately 1 million times -- that she got her law degree "by sending 100 box tops to Religious Lunatic University."

I would venture to say that the students at Goodling's law school at Regent University are far more impressive than those at the Cornell agriculture school -- the land-grant, non-Ivy League school Keith attended.

I wouldn't mention it, except that Olbermann savages anyone who didn't go to an impressive college. As it happens, he didn't go to an impressive college, either.

If you've ever watched any three nights of his show, you know that Olbermann went to Cornell. But he always forgets to mention that he went to the school that offers classes in milking and bovine management.

Indeed, Keith is constantly lying about his nonexistent "Ivy League" education, boasting to Playboy magazine, for example: "My Ivy League education taught me how to cut corners, skim books and take an idea and write 15 pages on it, and also how to work all day at the Cornell radio station and never actually go to class."

Except Keith didn't go to the Ivy League Cornell; he went to the Old MacDonald Cornell.

The real Cornell, the School of Arts and Sciences (average SAT: 1,325; acceptance rate: 1 in 6 applicants), is the only Ivy League school at Cornell and the only one that grants a Bachelor of Arts degree.

Keith went to an affiliated state college at Cornell, the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences (average SAT: about that of pulling guards at the University of South Carolina; acceptance rate: 1 of every 1.01 applicants).

Olbermann's incessant lying about having an "Ivy League education" when he went to the non-Ivy League ag school at Cornell would be like a graduate of the Yale locksmithing school boasting about being a "Yale man."

Among the graduates of the Ivy League Cornell are Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Thomas Pynchon, Paul Wolfowitz, E.B. White, Sanford I. Weill, Floyd Abrams, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Ginsburg, Janet Reno, Henry Heimlich and Harold Bloom.

Graduates of the ag school include David LeNeveu of the Anaheim Ducks, Mitch Carefoot of the Phoenix RoadRunners, Darren Eliot, former professional hockey player, and Joe Nieuwendyk, multiple Stanley Cup winner.

One begins to understand why Harvard students threw a chicken on the ice during Cornell's famous rout of Harvard at a 1973 hockey game.

If you actually want to pursue a career related to agriculture, there is no better school than the Cornell ag school. I have nothing but admiration for the farmers and aspiring veterinarians at the ag school. They didn't go there just to have "Cornell" on their resumes.

In addition to the farmers, there are some smart kids who go to the ag school -- as there are at all state universities. But most people who majored in "communications" at an ag school don't act like Marshall Scholars or go around mocking graduates of Regent University Law School.

The sort of insecurity that would force you to always say "trebled" instead of "tripled" could only come from a communications major with massive status anxiety, like Keith. Without even looking it up, I am confident that Harvard, Yale and Princeton do not offer degrees in "communications." I know there is no "communications" major at the Ivy League Cornell.

"Communications" is a major, along with "recreation science," most commonly associated with linemen at USC. But at least the linemen can throw a football, which Keith cannot because his mother decided he was not physically robust enough to play outdoors as a child.

It may seem cruel to reveal the true college of someone who already wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat worried that he's a fraud. But I believe that by pointing out that Olbermann actually is a fraud, I am liberating him.

You may not realize it now, Keith, but you will look back on this day and say, "That was the best thing that ever happened to me!"

Finally, you can stop pretending that you went to the hard-to-get-into Cornell.

Now you won't have to quickly change the subject whenever people idly remark that they didn't know it was possible to major in "communications" at an Ivy League school.

No longer will you have to aggressively bring up Cornell when it has nothing to do with the conversation.

Relax, Keith. Now you can let people like you for you.

COPYRIGHT 2009 ANN COULTER
DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE
1130 Walnut, Kansas City, MO 64106
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: franksolich on March 04, 2009, 06:01:13 PM
Damn, she's good.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Hawkgirl on March 04, 2009, 06:08:08 PM
 :lmao:

Ann, I'd like to buy you a drink...  :cheersmate:

(http://i43.tinypic.com/14aewk0.jpg)
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Lord Undies on March 04, 2009, 06:14:12 PM
To summarize Ann's piece for those who lurk and cannot bring themselves to read Ann's words:

Keith Olbermannnnn is just another phony, lying, creepy liberal who spends as much energy as possible to get as many people as possible to believe a lie.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: ReardenSteel on March 04, 2009, 06:19:36 PM
Wow. She is always so much fun.

Way to go Ann!  :cheersmate:
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wretched Excess on March 04, 2009, 06:26:43 PM
it's a lie!!  olbermann doesn't have a nutsack. :whatever: :-)
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: rich_t on March 04, 2009, 06:30:12 PM
it's a lie!!  olbermann doesn't have a nutsack. :whatever: :-)

Are you sure?

What's that floppy thing just below his nose?
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Eupher on March 04, 2009, 06:32:54 PM
it's a lie!!  olbermann doesn't have a nutsack. :whatever: :-)

Hmmm. Maybe he was gelded like some a' them horses he knows all about.  :whatever:

I find it amazing that Ann can actually watch Olberturd without throwing up. On the other hand, maybe she does......
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: DixieBelle on March 04, 2009, 06:34:11 PM
Go Ann! :-) Keef is a tool.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: rich_t on March 04, 2009, 06:35:02 PM
Hmmm. Maybe he was gelded like some a' them horses he knows all about.  :whatever:

I find it amazing that Ann can actually watch Olberturd without throwing up. On the other hand, maybe she does......

She is rather slender.  So it's a possibility.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Hawkgirl on March 04, 2009, 07:47:57 PM
I remember Ben Affleck imitating Olbermann on SNL awhile back...it was hilarous.  The chump is a legend in his own mind...
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Zathras on March 04, 2009, 08:02:52 PM
Are you sure?

What's that floppy thing just below his nose?

Obama's nut sack.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Rebel on March 04, 2009, 08:03:39 PM
I was with her until this:

Quote
Keith went to an affiliated state college at Cornell, the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences (average SAT: about that of pulling guards at the University of South Carolina; acceptance rate: 1 of every 1.01 applicants).

I hate the Gamebirds, but don't down my southern brethren (Unless I read her wrong). Also, I think if I were pursuing a degree in agriculture I'd rather have a degree from the Mississippi State University, another school I cannot stand, than Cornell. Cornell is in, what, New York? Yeah, I'm sticking with the school that's actually in farming country.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Sam Adams on March 05, 2009, 01:22:22 AM
Whoa. This is gret stuff, if true. Can we verify which Cornell KO actually attended? Anybody?
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: 5412 on March 05, 2009, 06:33:30 AM
Good Morning,

I just fired off an email demanding that Olbermann be canned, what the heck!  If this was a conservative host this would be front page news and an uproar would be heard around the world.

regards,
5412
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Tess on March 05, 2009, 07:28:20 AM
I was with her until this:

I hate the Gamebirds, but don't down my southern brethren (Unless I read her wrong). Also, I think if I were pursuing a degree in agriculture I'd rather have a degree from the Mississippi State University, another school I cannot stand, than Cornell. Cornell is in, what, New York? Yeah, I'm sticking with the school that's actually in farming country.

In the latter part of her article she does tout the goods of Cornell AG.  She is showing, in her sarcasm and sharp wit, that Keith is doing what just about every liberal likes to do.  They like to show others up with all their "knoll-ledge" and talk about how much better they are for doing something someone else hasn't done.  And, in his case he has been lying about the implication that the school he went to was Ivy League.  All the while making fun of a republican who didn't go to an Ivy League.  The disgusting thing is, HE is the one that is ashamed of what school he went to.  Ann is clearly pointing that out.

I can see your frustration but what she is doing is poking fun and "outing" keith more than slamming the school.  For her it isn't about the school, it is about Keith's attempted deception about where he went to school.  I applaud her for that.  I am so sick and tired of bloated liberal media correspondents acting like they are above everyone else just because they are sitting in front of a camera.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wretched Excess on March 05, 2009, 08:21:59 AM
olbermann does like to pick on tiny details that he doesn't even usually understand.  after Sarah Palin's convention speech in which she mentioned that her son's national guard unit was deploying to iraq on a certain date, olbermann rather breathlessly pointed out that her comment "violated OPSEC, operational security", he helpfully explained :whatever:, and hinted rather ominously that there would be trouble.

when his national guard unit left for iraq, it was a public event.  there was a ceremony with parents, reporters, photographers, and the general public.  and when it left the states for iraq had little to do with when and where they actually hit the ground in iraq.

it was ignorant comment borne out of a desire to smear Sarah Palin, and all he managed to accomplish was to look like an ass.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: TheSarge on March 05, 2009, 08:30:29 AM
Quote
There is utterly no purpose to these lame "gotchas," except that Olbermann is so desperately insecure that he is willing to waste valuable airtime in order to convince other status-conscious idiots that he is, like, scary-smart.

Scary yes.

(http://jour3098.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/keith_olbermann.jpg)


Smart?  Not so much.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: TheSarge on March 05, 2009, 08:39:36 AM
olbermann does like to pick on tiny details that he doesn't even usually understand.  after Sarah Palin's convention speech in which she mentioned that her son's national guard unit was deploying to iraq on a certain date, olbermann rather breathlessly pointed out that her comment "violated OPSEC, operational security", he helpfully explained :whatever:, and hinted rather ominously that there would be trouble.

when his national guard unit left for iraq, it was a public event.  there was a ceremony with parents, reporters, photographers, and the general public.  and when it left the states for iraq had little to do with when and where they actually hit the ground in iraq.

it was ignorant comment borne out of a desire to smear Sarah Palin, and all he managed to accomplish was to look like an ass.

Not to mention the fact that once the date has been announced by DoD on their website in the form of a news release...there's no OPSEC issue.

Overbite should leave the complicated stuff like that to the experts.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wretched Excess on March 05, 2009, 08:46:11 AM
Not to mention the fact that once the date has been announced by DoD on their website in the form of a news release...there's no OPSEC issue.

Overbite should leave the complicated stuff like that to the experts.

exactly.  it was public information.  people shouldn't comment on things that they not only don't understand, but view with disdain.  liberals like keith olbermann view the military with disdain.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: NHSparky on March 05, 2009, 10:35:37 AM
I particularly loved his coverage of the discharge leak on USS Houston last year.  Made it sound like a full-blown Bush-lied, kids died coverup.

The fact was a valve leaked by and the total amount of radioactivity involved was less than that found in a 50-pound bag of fertilizer, but don't try to tell that to Olbertard.

Oh, and did I mention he sucked donkey balls when he was on ESPN?
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wretched Excess on March 05, 2009, 10:51:03 AM
I particularly loved his coverage of the discharge leak on USS Houston last year.  Made it sound like a full-blown Bush-lied, kids died coverup.

The fact was a valve leaked by and the total amount of radioactivity involved was less than that found in a 50-pound bag of fertilizer, but don't try to tell that to Olbertard.

Oh, and did I mention he sucked donkey balls when he was on ESPN?

I thought he was great on sportscenter, but that was before I realized he was a nutjob.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: NHSparky on March 05, 2009, 11:12:05 AM
I thought he was great on sportscenter, but that was before I realized he was a nutjob.

The only thing that made him remotely listenable was Dan Patrick.  Together, they were tolerable.  Separated, neither one is worth a rat's rip.

Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wineslob on March 05, 2009, 11:43:09 AM
(http://i88.photobucket.com/albums/k179/Apogeespeaker/kick2.gif)










OWNED ........................jackass  :bird:
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: jinxmchue on March 05, 2009, 01:02:00 PM
I don't know if I agree with so many people attacking Olbermann.  I mean, it's wrong to attack retards, right?
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Crazy Horse on March 05, 2009, 01:25:44 PM
I don't know if I agree with so many people attacking Olbermann.  I mean, it's wrong to attack retards, right?

Only if you're the retard
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: docstew on March 05, 2009, 06:55:30 PM
I don't know if I agree with so many people attacking Olbermann.  I mean, it's wrong to attack retards, right?

we're not attacking him because he's a retard, we're attacking him cause he's a sniveling little shit who happens to be retarded... there's a difference
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Rebel on March 05, 2009, 07:03:18 PM
we're not attacking him because he's a retard, we're attacking him cause he's a sniveling little shit who happens to be retarded... there's a difference

I think jinx posted that in jest. At least, from knowing him for about 3 years, it appeared to be in jest.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Wretched Excess on March 05, 2009, 07:05:33 PM
I think jinx posted that in jest. At least, from knowing him for about 3 years, it appeared to be in jest.

 I thought even calling him a retard was in jest :???: . . . . life is so complicated. :-)
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: jinxmchue on March 05, 2009, 08:22:30 PM
I thought even calling him a retard was in jest :???: . . . . life is so complicated. :-)

The people I work with are developmentally disabled and a hell of a lot smarter than Queef Slobbermann.  He's just plain old retarded.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Chris_ on March 06, 2009, 09:46:36 AM
Whoa. This is gret stuff, if true. Can we verify which Cornell KO actually attended? Anybody?

Wikipedia shows KO as graduating from Cornell with a degree in communications. After a brief search the only place that I can find that offers a degree in communications is a statutory college that is apparently known as The New York State College of Agriculture and Life Sciences at Cornell University.

Oberman's Cornell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornell_University_College_of_Agriculture_and_Life_Sciences)
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Sam Adams on March 06, 2009, 10:04:15 AM
Wikipedia shows KO as graduating from Cornell with a degree in communications. After a brief search the only place that I can find that offers a degree in communications is a statutory college that is apparently known as The New York State College of Agriculture and Life Sciences at Cornell University.

Oberman's Cornell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornell_University_College_of_Agriculture_and_Life_Sciences)


That is good enough for me. I am sure KO will correct the record, loudly, if Coulter is wrong. Media Matters or Daily Kos will jump in, too.
Title: Re: Ann kicks Keith in the knut sack...
Post by: Baruch Menachem on March 07, 2009, 07:58:57 PM
That is good enough for me. I am sure KO will correct the record, loudly, if Coulter is wrong. Media Matters or Daily Kos will jump in, too.


don't forget the </ :sarcasm: > tag.  All HTML code has to have end tags.