The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on February 03, 2009, 10:38:27 AM

Title: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: franksolich on February 03, 2009, 10:38:27 AM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=353x2451

No primitives at this bonfire yet.

Quote
Lerkfish  (1000+ posts)        Tue Feb-03-09 11:29 AM
Original message
 
simple trick to make cheap paper plates hold as much as expensive plates instead of buying more expensive "thicker" paper plates, you can get the same structural integrity by performing a simple trick with the cheapest paper plates you can buy.

I invented this trick myself (though others might have independently come up with it) at a picnic when the paper plates kept wimping out while trying to hold them with one hand and dish in food with the other. INvariably, the plate would "fail" and flop down, dumping the contents.

here's the simple trick:

BEFORE using the cheap paper plate, set it on a hard surface.

1. fold in a portion of the outer edge so that side of the plate sticks up (about a fifth or sixth of the total diameter)

2. continue around the plate, folding up portions as you go around.

3. in the end you should have:

a rough pentagon or hexagon flat bottom, and wedges of the edges sticking straight up in the air.

Now, hold the plate. It will now hold more weight, and further is more structurally sound so will not flop over. you have less square inches in two dimensions, but you have sides that hold food in so you can heap higher.

I dunno; maybe I'm stupid or something, but I'm not quite grasping this.

franksolich, when confronted with a cheap paper plate, slips a pot lid or a glass cookware lid or one of those straw-woven things or an old shingle underneath it.

It's a Hell of a lot easier than what the fishy primitive is suggesting here.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Karin on February 03, 2009, 10:45:31 AM
I read through that, and then put my head down and quietly laughed for a spell.  Do you have any idea how long it probably took to type that out?  I keep having this mental picture of this doofus having a big pile of beans & weenies fall in his lap, with a bewildered expression on his face. 
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: USA4ME on February 03, 2009, 10:51:01 AM
Wow, what a genius.  :gay:

While he's over there folding a paper plate for 5 minutes, I'm grabbing two plates for extra thickness and heading off to load up.

.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on February 03, 2009, 11:55:37 AM
The straw-woven plate holders, to which Frank refers, were our preferred solution back in cave days when Oooola and I lacked a dishwasher and used cheap paper plates for our mastodon hash.  Far stronger than the stupid folding drill and you don't have to screw around pretending to do origami before actually eating.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Chris on February 03, 2009, 11:58:05 AM
Wow, what a genius.  :gay:

While he's over there folding a paper plate for 5 minutes, I'm grabbing two plates for extra thickness and heading off to load up.

Do you think they make things out to be difficult so people will think they're smart for "handling" the situation?
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Ree on February 03, 2009, 12:24:17 PM
But that little foldin trick won't do a damned thing about stuff soakin thru.... :mental:
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Chris_ on February 03, 2009, 12:38:17 PM
This method also works to shore up 9/11 Rabbit Hutch Experiments... :rotf:
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: JohnnyReb on February 03, 2009, 12:40:02 PM
Just like a free loading DUmmie....always trying to think up ways to get more for nothing.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: delilahmused on February 03, 2009, 12:57:04 PM
It must be part of the socialist mindset to find the most complicated "solution" to a problem. The easiest solution would be just to buy better quality paper plates. Then next easiest would be to find something rigid to put underneath them. But no, this DUmmie has figured out a way to shore up its plate with a method that's not only ridiculously convoluted but ensures everyone will have less on their plate. Sometimes I wonder if the left doesn't sit around channeling Rube Goldberg while smoking crack.

Cindie
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: BlueStateSaint on February 03, 2009, 01:23:24 PM
The straw-woven plate holders, to which Frank refers, were our preferred solution back in cave days when Oooola and I lacked a dishwasher and used cheap paper plates for our mastodon hash.  Far stronger than the stupid folding drill and you don't have to screw around pretending to do origami before actually eating.

 :lmao: :rotf: :lmao: :rotf: :lmao: :rotf:

H5, DAT!
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Miss Mia on February 03, 2009, 02:29:29 PM
Just spend the extra money and get Chinet.  :)
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: debk on February 03, 2009, 02:45:06 PM
Go to the Dollar Tree and get the plastic ones (like Solo) where it's a dollar for 12 or so plates. Beats the heck out of a mess on the carpet or furniture.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: PatriotGame on February 03, 2009, 02:50:25 PM
But that little foldin trick won't do a damned thing about stuff soakin thru.... :mental:

The real test of his superior paper plate engineering prowess is how well the plates would hold up against a wire cage, a rock, and burning kerosene.
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: Karin on February 03, 2009, 03:24:03 PM
What if he did this on a date?
Title: Re: cheapskate fishy primitive tries to use cheap paper plates
Post by: thundley4 on February 03, 2009, 03:59:21 PM
What if he did this on a date?

I think the DUmmie was talking about some sort of potluck dinner. Are you suggesting that he may have been looking for love at a family reunion?  :rotf: