The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: Carl on January 18, 2009, 05:25:46 PM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x4853923
Generic Other (1000+ posts) Sun Jan-18-09 12:15 PM
Original message
A good old fashion banshee's curse to send off our national nightmare (please add your own)
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I curse Bush to a life of catcalls and jeers. Ducked shoes. Egged limos. People spitting on him. Let him run from the American people like Brittney Spears runs from paparazzi.
May his investments all lose money. His roof leak. His gated community shun him. His dog turn on him. His car breakdown. His bills pile up. His speaking engagements get canceled. His book get pulped for lack of sales. His legal bills mount. His socks never match. His shoes pinch. Let him get gout. Inflamed hemorrhoids. Butt boils.
Let him have nightmares. Night sweats. Let the dead return to haunt his every waking moment. Let him wash the blood off his hands like an OCD fiend.
Let him feel the anger, the pain, the ugliness he caused return to him tenfold.
Let the banshees of hell chase his heels until the day he dies
What a charming bunch. :whatever:
Yet they call us "hateful". :lmao:
Avabea (738 posts) Sun Jan-18-09 12:20 PM
Response to Original message
1. Druids Curse for *
May the bleeding piles assail him
and corns adorn his feet
May crabs as big as roaches climb his balls and eat
When the whole world turns against him
and he's a total wreck
May he fall through his own asshole
and break his ****ing neck.
Martin Eden (1000+ posts) Sun Jan-18-09 12:24 PM
Response to Original message
6. My poem to Bush
I’d tell you to go **** yourself
But that is much too kind
Because if you could perform that feat
You’d take pleasure in your behind
I’d like to say eat shit and die
But you deserve much more
You should suffer all the grief and pain
Of your misbegotten war
Though I can never make you feel
Or think, or understand
I’ll take solace when you hear your name
Cursed throughout the land
From inside a lonely prison cell
Dark and bare and cold
Where every day you pay for your crimes
Till you’re sick, heartbroken, and old
And when you finally leave the earth
You ****ed over oh so well
If there is a God and afterlife
You’re going straight to hell.
Aristus (1000+ posts) Sun Jan-18-09 12:43 PM
Response to Original message
15. I curse him to The Pain!
Edited on Sun Jan-18-09 01:05 PM by Aristus
To The Pain means;
He shall have his feet cut off at the ankles
Then his hands below the wrists
Then his tongue
Then his left eye followed by his right eye
And then his nose.
But not his ears...
His ears, he keeps, and I'll tell you why:
So that every scream of every child
Who recoils at his hideousness
So that every cry of every babe
Every mother who screams:
"Dear God! What is that thing?"
Will echo in his perfect ears.
That is what To The Pain means:
It means I leave him in anguish
Wallowing in freakish misery...
Forever...
Shiver (1000+ posts) Sun Jan-18-09 01:13 PM
Response to Reply #24
30. The Turkey Curse is the counter to the Curse of Greyface
and is wielded by Discordians purely for their own protection. And sometimes for fun. And at boring dinner parties.
But as amusing as it may be, it is VERY POWERFUL and it WORKS. As everyone knows, Greyface and his followers require an aneristic environment to function; the Turkey Curse introduces eristic vibrations that completely and totally destroy the foundation and surroundings of an aneristic environment, throwing it completely off-kilter. Those, like the Resident, that are firmly under the thrall of Greyface will find themselves unable to function or react (or dodge a shoe). If the user is strong enough, the target brains may even short-circuit, allowing mustaches to be drawn on their faces while they reboot. With permanent ink.
Like I said, though... I don't know which direction to face, and I've never tried it over a distance before...
:mental: :mental: :mental: :mental: :mental:
Carni (1000+ posts) Sun Jan-18-09 12:55 PM
Response to Original message
25. My curse for him- irrelevance/ insignificance
May you fade into oblivion you odious, insignificant, foul little man.
I doubt that the President has much to worry over but you at least described yourselves.
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x4853923
:mental: :mental: :mental: :mental: :mental:
Yeah, that part is more or less from the Illuminatus! trilogy and related writings. Eris = goddess of discord, leading to 'erisian' being the discordant social guerrillas (i.e. smelly useless hippies and dropout slackers) while anerisian is the opposite, the forces of order. Stupid as Hell but it gives a bunch of dope-smoking losers the illusion they are actually a part of an important force in the world.
Wonder if one of the Pagans will pipe up to tell them that curses can return threefold to the ill-wisher?
:-)
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Yeah, that part is more or less from the Illuminatus! trilogy and related writings. Eris = goddess of discord, leading to 'erisian' being the discordant social guerrillas (i.e. smelly useless hippies and dropout slackers) while anerisian is the opposite, the forces of order. Stupid as Hell but it gives a bunch of dope-smoking losers the illusion they are actually a part of an important force in the world.
Wonder if one of the Pagans will pipe up to tell them that curses can return threefold to the ill-wisher?
:-)
They often do, don't they? God has this "weird" sense of humor like that. :innocent: