The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: fatboy on December 25, 2017, 08:48:07 AM
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A heart warming DUmmy Christmas joke...
Sat Dec 23, 2017, 07:06 PM
Roland99 (39,531 posts)
Ayn Rand, Rand Paul and Paul Ryan walk into a bar...
The bartender serves them tainted alcohol because there are no regulations.
They all die.
:whistling: :whistling: :whistling: :whistling:
https://www.democraticunderground.com/100210019941
A few select responses...
Response to marble falls (Reply #22)
Sun Dec 24, 2017, 11:47 AM
Star Member alfredo (56,705 posts)
48. A commune in Detroit put Boones Farm to good use.
They named their commune the Boones Farm commune, christened the house with a bottle of Boones farm and a bag of weed.
I award one :stoner:
Response to Roland99 (Original post)
Sat Dec 23, 2017, 07:18 PM
TEB (1,901 posts)
3. Hope they invite Gop members of congress as well
I have no problem feeding the boog.
Response to Roland99 (Original post)
Sat Dec 23, 2017, 07:25 PM
TheCowsCameHome (35,050 posts)
4. *sniff* Happy endings always make me misty *sniff*
What a wonderful end to the story.
:loser: :loser: :loser: :loser:
Three DUmmies walk into a county walfare office and demand some EBT cards. They are told that they just gave the last of the alloted supply to refugees from Syria, Lebanon and Mexico. The DUmmies hold their breath until their faces turn blue. Then they visit the local Baptist food bank where they are given bags of free food including a fresh 20 pound turkey. On the way home they are perplexed trying to decide how to cook the turkey as they usually eat at McDonalds.
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A liberal walked into the local welfare office, marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi, I'm tired of handouts, I want a job."
The man behind the counter replied, "Your timing is amazing. We've just got a listing from a very wealthy man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his beautiful nympho daughter. You'll have to drive around in a big white Mercedes, but the suits, shirts, and ties are provided. Because of the long hours of this job, meals will also be provided and you will also be required to escort the young lady on her overseas holidays. The salary package is $200,000 a year."
The liberal said, "Ah c'mon, you're making this up!"
The man behind the counter said, "Well, you started it!"
.
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People being poisoned because of government regulations:
The Chemist's War
The little-told story of how the U.S. government poisoned alcohol during Prohibition with deadly consequences.
http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/medical_examiner/2010/02/the_chemists_war.html
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Three DUmmies walk into a county walfare office and demand some EBT cards. They are told that they just gave the last of the alloted supply to refugees from Syria, Lebanon and Mexico. The DUmmies hold their breath until their faces turn blue. Then they visit the local Baptist food bank where they are given bags of free food including a fresh 20 pound turkey. On the way home they are perplexed trying to decide how to cook the turkey as they usually eat at McDonalds.
You forget the following parts:
1. At the Baptist food bank, the DUmmies then openly insult the churchgoers giving them the food (Including calling them "Racists" and "Nazis"), and loudly insult Christianity as a whole.
2. On the way home, they lament the fascistic practice of killing animals for meat, and decide to give the turkey a "Decent burial."
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Merry Christmas to you, too, "Roland99". Thanks for the reminder of where not to look for classy people.
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You forget the following parts:
1. At the Baptist food bank, the DUmmies then openly insult the churchgoers giving them the food (Including calling them "Racists" and "Nazis"), and loudly insult Christianity as a whole.
2. On the way home, they lament the fascistic practice of killing animals for meat, and decide to give the turkey a "Decent burial."
O M G. :lmao: :lmao: :hi5:
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3 DU members walk into a bar.
They are offered a bar bet that they can't win an argument against a woman who's been dead for 35 years.
They lose.