The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on October 15, 2017, 06:51:54 PM

Title: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: franksolich on October 15, 2017, 06:51:54 PM
https://www.democraticunderground.com/10029712523

Oh my.

This is the primitive down in South Carolina who's a little old lady supporting at least one old and ill cat that costs donors to gofundme a bundle to keep ill; she also once had a fund-raiser because she was short money for mechanical work on her car.....at about the same time she bragged about donating money to the last opponent of Mitch McConnell in Kentucky--Kentucky is not South Carolina, in case one doesn't know--some woman whose name I've long forgotten.

Anyway.

Quote
Are_grits_groceries (16,845 posts)     Sun Oct 15, 2017, 03:48 AM

I did a good deed and then wanted to burn everything I was wearing.

I met a neighbor when I was leaving to run errands. He asked me if I smelled the garbage in the upstairs apartment across from my building. I looked and saw some white trash bags on the patio. I told him no but I might be upwind.

He lived in the apartment below and as we walked toward his building, I got a whiff. A shithouse mouse would gag. From what I could gather, he had tried to talk to her but she never answered the door. Sooooooooo, I volunteered to try to help and get the bags moved. He stayed around to carry them and for backup.

I’m sure those who know me here think I asked her if she knew her patio could knock a buzzard off a shitwagon. Well, Mama raised me better so I turned on my pleasant, Southern button. I knocked and she finally came to the door. She had seen me watching the birds on my patio so I guess she thought I was ok. Ha!

I went full Southern and told her I had just noticed those trash bags. I wondered if she needed a little bit of help getting them thrown away because I just knew she wanted to sit out there. She was overjoyed. She was from NY and disabled her daughter did live down here but had moved back and her DIL only came every now and then. That’s what it sounded like.

So out to the patio we went. One bag was not quite full but the other bag was bursting at the seams. (Pause for dramatic music). We tried to put it in another bag. Bad idea. It tore about 8 inches. That was enough for little white larvae to fall out. Oh joy. I immediately went into teacher mode. In teacher mode, I never react openly to anything. I just deal with it .

I went to my apartment and got a bigger bag. I also grabbed some hand sanitizer. Bathing in that crossed my mind. I got back in time to see a bigger tear and more critters. We loaded the bag into the bigger one and I suggested she get some bleach. I really wanted to suggest renting a flamethrower or using napalm.

So I left with her garbage and whatever families were living in it. By now, I was itching all over. The man took the bags and threw them away. We both used the sanitizer. I told him I had given her my phone number and suggested she call me if the trash needed nuking. Hopefully, I won’t regret that.

I postponed my errands while I took a shower in scalding water. My clothes went right into the wash and I looked for the ‘surface of the sun’ temperature setting. I don’t know if my shoes were supposed to be washed but they went round too. Moonpie and Tater informed me that they almost voted me out of the apartment. They were suitably horrified.

Thus endeth another adventure. I am glad I helped although I could have done with no fauna. I think of Tennessee Williams and ‘the kindness of strangers.’ I’m no spring chicken and that could be me. I will check on her. I am also trying to think of someone to help and keep her on their radar.

My sweet Southern switch has been turned off. I am now back to my usual cranky and surly. I feel so much better. I am still trying to get over the itchy feeling.

After which the primitives get all mushy over her.
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: SVPete on October 15, 2017, 06:59:26 PM
Good grief, what a garrulous something-or-other! That story should have been 2-4 sentence long. For a retired teacher her grammar is a bit spotty.

The story reminds me of a saying a room mate of long long ago used: "______ would gag a maggot at 50 paces."
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: I_B_Perky on October 15, 2017, 07:32:16 PM
Quote
Are_grits_groceries (16,845 posts)     Sun Oct 15, 2017, 03:48 AM

I did a good deed and then wanted to burn everything I was wearing.

Whoop-dee-doo.  Only thing I am interested in is this:  If in fact you do burn everything you are wearing... please do it while you are wearing it.  Until that happens just STFU.
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: USA4ME on October 15, 2017, 07:57:03 PM
Quote from:
Are_grits_groceries

That was enough for little white larvae to fall out... I got back in time to see a bigger tear and more critters.

Here in the South, we just call them Democrats.

.
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: FunkyZero on October 15, 2017, 08:52:36 PM
https://www.democraticunderground.com/10029712523

Oh my.

This is the primitive down in South Carolina who's a little old lady supporting at least one old and ill cat that costs donors to gofundme a bundle to keep ill; she also once had a fund-raiser because she was short money for mechanical work on her car.....at about the same time she bragged about donating money to the last opponent of Mitch McConnell in Kentucky--Kentucky is not South Carolina, in case one doesn't know--some woman whose name I've long forgotten.

Anyway.

After which the primitives get all mushy over her.

I was reading that expecting the ending to be something like "then I found out she voted for Trump!!"
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: Bad Dog on October 16, 2017, 12:17:28 AM
I want to know why the woman from NY disabled her daughter?
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on October 16, 2017, 05:46:02 AM
I want to know why the woman from NY disabled her daughter?

Meh, New Yorkers, go figure.
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: 67 Rover on October 16, 2017, 06:30:53 AM
Meh, New Yorkers, go figure.

 :lol:  H5
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: Old n Grumpy on October 16, 2017, 08:35:46 AM
I want to know why the woman from NY disabled her daughter?

She found out her daughter voted for Trump. :thatsright:
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: BlueStateSaint on October 16, 2017, 11:06:34 AM
She found out her daughter voted for Trump. :thatsright:

That would not surprise me. :whistling:
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: BadCat on October 16, 2017, 11:29:07 AM
Quote
That was enough for little white larvae to fall out. Oh joy.

DUmmy dinner for a week.
Title: Re: primitive helps another primitive
Post by: FiddyBeowulf on October 16, 2017, 12:00:25 PM
Quote
That was enough for little white larvae to fall out. Oh joy.

DUmmy dinner for a week.
Still better than kale.