stupid tricks the primitives try to pull

[franksolich]

stupid tricks the primitives try to pull.  Since there’s been so many new members here on conservativecave the past year who might, or might not, be aware of the frauds and deceits done by the primitives on Skins’s island, and since we’re ginning up for the presidential debates, the election, Thanksgiving and the War Against Christmas…..to be followed by nominations and voting for the top primitives of 2012, now’s a good time for a review.

Posting articles as if they’re the primitive’s personal experience.  This is a constant deception, and even long-time observers of the primitives can be pulled into it, where a primitive makes an original topic post seem as if the primitive wrote it.

Good examples of this would be the Die alte Sau's recent campfire enthusiastic about abortion, or the rich bitch the kpete primitive’s post about an altered campaign yard-sign.

Of course, the first tip-off should’ve been that they were too well-written to have been created by either primitive, neither of whom is known for being literarily talented.

Skins is fussy about being sure the primitives include links for their original topics, and that’s usually the best thing to look for when examining a primitive campfire for the first time, if one’s in doubt.

If there’s a link, it’s not the primitive’s personal experience and story; if there’s not a link, it might be the primitive’s personal experience and story, but don’t take that for granted.  The primitives after all are notorious for plagiarism.  The quality of the grammar and spelling is a good guide in such cases; if it’s poor, it’s pretty obvious it’s the primitive’s original work.

Giving misleading primitive titles to news stories.  The classic case of this was discovered by our colleague Carl a few years ago, where a primitive had posted an original article, but titled it “Pat Buchanan says slavery the best thing that happened to blacks.”

Carl clicked the link, finding the original story, which was entitled “Pat Buchanan says America the best thing that happened to blacks.”

Generally it’s not recommended that one click on links given by primitives, unless one’s an expert in discerning if a link has a virus.  I’m not, so I don’t.  If the primitive headline is preposterous, I just reasonably assume the primitive altered the title of the article where it first appeared.

I’m not aware of any recent cases, but back when Fat Che, the “BenBurch” primitive, was hanging around on Skins’s island, he posted links that somehow betrayed to him valuable information about a primitive.  Fat Che of course was notorious for trying to gather information on his fellow primitives, for purposes of blackmail.

Taking advantage of the tier system.  Comments at campfires on Skins’s island are not displayed chronologically, in numerical order.  Skins and Elad, in their infinite wisdom of primitivity, when first setting up Skins’s island, knew that the “quote” function, such as that used on conservativecave, was too sophisticated for the primitives to understand and use.

And so the primitives respond to comments directly, and as they might be responding to a comment further down the thread, or further up the thread, the chronological display gets out of order, comment 1, comment 117 (responding to comment 1), comment 2, comment 6 (responding to comment 2), comment 3, comment 27 (responding to comment 3), and so on.

Since the natural inclination is to read things from the top down, this mixture of chronology allows primitives to deceive the casual reader, who supposes a comment by a certain primitive closer to the top of the thread was made earlier than a comment by the same primitive near the end of the thread.

If one takes the time and trouble to “assort” primitive comments in chronological order, one finds some pretty impressive lies and whoppers from the same primitive.  But that takes a lot of time and trouble, re-assorting a thread into chronological order; it’s just easier to quite reasonably assume whatever’s being said is a lie, no matter where the comment appears.

The use of sock-puppets.  Skins “forbids” the use of multiple accounts on his real-estate, but then and again, he doesn’t.  It depends upon who’s doing the sock-puppetry; some primitives can get away with it, others can’t.

Poor stupid Beth during the Scamdal seven years ago used teams of sock-puppets to make it appear as if her scam was bringing in the bucks, and to inspire yet more donations.  Unfortunately for poor stupid Beth, even though the screen-names varied considerably, the vocabulary and usage were oddly similar, and so her sock-puppets were easy to detect.

Actually, the primitives aren’t as good at this thing as they think they are.

Kicking their own campfires.  Sometimes primitives get all bent out of shape because they’ve posted something they think is important, but apparently the other primitives don’t, and so the thread slowly slips down to the bottom of the front page, and then into one of the back pages, out of sight.

Every time a comment is made on a thread, no matter how old the thread is, it gets bumped right back up to the top.  This is a characteristic also seen on conservativecave, but usually decent and civilized people add something of substance to that thread, to bump it back to the top.

The primitives on the other hand, just lazily write “kick” or “k&r” (acronym for “kick and return”), thus bumping that thread back to the top without any new information or insight.

Pretending expertise in certain areas.  This is a characteristic most usually found in the small forums on Skins’s island, such as those dealing with ripping off the social security disability system.

I swear, attorneys specializing in social security cases can toss out all their law-books, and merely use the “disability” forum on Skins’s island as their source of legal information and insight; primitives seem to know an awful lot more about this, than even the attorneys do.

And wherever among the smaller forums campfires about medical malpractice can be found, another area of ostensible expertise especially among the hypochondrial primitives.

But given how the primitives lie, one doesn’t really know if that advice is any good or not.

The use of foreign words and phrases.  The primitives do this so as to show off, and franksolich years ago took up the habit himself, so as to show off to the primitives that he’s better, and more natural, at this than they are.  It’s silly, but whatever.

The cooking and baking primitives are remarkably notorious for this, preferring to use “sophisticated” French and Italian words, rather than plain simple English. 

It’s comical, reading their comments on the supper threads, where dear old sweet Lu inquires what the primitives are preparing.  They throw out phrases such as veau et nouilles en casserole, poulet au Riz l’Italienne, pouding au poulet a la mode de Sud, pommes de terre a la ciboulette, agneau et celeri a la Grecque and so on.

When in fact the primitives are just yanking day-old leftovers out of the refrigerator for supper.

However, it was even worse a few years ago, in the election reform forum, during the spat between the malicious cartoon character the “Kelvin Mace” primitive, and a prominent election-reform activist.  He didn’t like her because he’d tried to cheat her on a book deal, and she wouldn’t let him cheat her.

The primitives were always wanting to sue her, and threw out all sorts of arcane legal phrases as if Julius Caesar himself had taught them their Latin.  When in fact the litigant-hopeful primitives had no idea what they were talking about.  But it made them look “learned”…..at least to the other primitives.

- - - - - - - - - -

The cardinal rule remains: when looking at what the primitives say, it’s all lies in some way, shape, or form.

And in the near-12-year history of Skins's island, there's never been one primitive more trustworthy than the other primitives.

[Wineslob]

You just described the Oblate Spheroid.

[dixierose]

Thanks for the insight, frank.

[98ZJUSMC]

Pretty good overview, Coach.  That place is the optimum test tube environment for the study of dissonant behavior.  The ease with which they lie to themselves, much less someone else, is mind-numbing.

Proving Mark Levins' statement, every day.

[franksolich]

You just described the Oblate Spheroid.

There's a new one too, but it might not be a primitive attempt to deceive.

It might just be an honest coincidence.

The other day when I was on Skins's island, as I was scrolling down a big campfire there, I noticed there's a primitive named "Tavernier," but I didn't bother checking it out.

So be aware--there's the Taverner primitive, whom we all know, and this Tavernier primitive whom we don't know.

[Ogre]

You just described the Oblate Spheroid.

Yup, suffice it to say, Nads makes use of everyone of the tricks Frank listed.

Oh crap, I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth when I realized I used Nads and tricks in the same sentence.

[Cruise]

Thank you for the write-up, franksolich.

In particular, I would never have thought to look at the comments in chronological order. 

The bouncies are my favorite.  Sad and pathetic.