campaign thread for the Top DUmmies of 2013

[franksolich]

This is for the DUmmy of the year. I'm only voting on what went down in 2013.

It might be worth exploring a DUmmy of the decade (DOTD), covering 2003 to 2013.

Here we got the old contradiction--should a primitive be named DUmmie of the year for his steady consistent unexhaustible output of amusement and entertainment over the whole year (or much of it).....or should a primitive be named DUmmie of the year because he did something, even if only one single thing, that was so stupid it blew the mind away?

Obviously, I'm going with the former this year, although in past years sometimes I went for the latter.

I went with the cousin as the Top DUmmie this year because the brain-damaged primitive's a shoo-in for the Steven Dawes award anyway, in addition to surely what will be #02 Top DUmmie of 2013, so he's not carrying away peanuts for awards.

[franksolich]

Only seven more hours to go before polls close.

Please get those votes, or changes in votes already cast, now, folks!

You may submit them to Mr. Wiggum (Ralph Wiggum) via private message, or at ralphwiggumcave@outlook.com

[Ralph Wiggum]

Don't we need some voter ID or "voter-verified" ballots? (In honor of Andy Stephenson) 

[Chris_]

Don't we need some voter ID or "voter-verified" ballots? (In honor of Andy Stephenson) 

Where's my paper trail?

[EagleKeeper]

Well, I of course don't know any more about how voting went than anybody else does, other than the guy who's counting them, but I'm suspecting that with the Top DUmmies of 2013, the torch has been passed onto a new generation of primitives.  

When one looks at the ballot, there were, really, very few candidates from the ancien regime--the Bostonian Drunkard, the CalPig primitive, the Taverner primitive, the mike_c primitive, the sparkling old dude, and a very few others--who were among the first generation of Top DUmmies.

And probably none of these old fogies are going to get elected to anything.

This is apparently the year that marks out with the old, in with the new.

I just submitted my final tally and it does, indeed, reflect what you are speaking to.

The old pros from dover are falling by the wayside at an alarming rate but I have confidence that the new guard will be able to take up the slack.

[Ralph Wiggum]

I just submitted my final tally and it does, indeed, reflect what you are speaking to.

The old pros from dover are falling by the wayside at an alarming rate but I have confidence that the new guard will be able to take up the slack.

Yep, they will always pass the torch of stupidity onto a new generation.

[Mr Mannn]

Don't we need some voter ID or "voter-verified" ballots? (In honor of Andy Stephenson) 

We're could be only $10 dollars away from proving DainBramaged stole the election that rightfully belonged to nadin.

[BlueStateSaint]

Here's my slate:

Top 5

#1.  DainBramaged

#2.  Lady Freedom Returns

#3.  Locut0s

#4.  BainsBane

#5.  Omaha Steve . . . just because.

The rest of the Top 10:

Nadin

TheMastersNemesis

WillPitt

MrScorpio

steveleser

Other awards:

Willie:  undergroundpanther

Steve:  DainBramaged

Rob:  Locut0s

Nadin:  (Who else?) Nadin

Group:  Anti-gun idiots

Anyone I left out?

[franksolich]

Here's my slate:

Anyone I left out?

Yeah.  Skippy.

[franksolich]

We're could be only $10 dollars away from proving DainBramaged stole the election that rightfully belonged to nadin.

Good one, sir; excellent!

[BlueStateSaint]

Yeah.  Skippy.

Next year, Coach . . . next year.

[BattleHymn]

Yeah.  Skippy.

 

[Carl]

I make a motion that we have an honorary coaches award...it will be at Franks desecration for the primitive of his choice.
It will kind of be like a best of the rest for those DUmbasses that got so close but were yet so far away. 

[franksolich]

I make a motion that we have an honorary coaches award...it will be at Franks desecration for the primitive of his choice.
It will kind of be like a best of the rest for those DUmbasses that got so close but were yet so far away. 

IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou.

I wonder why I never thought of it myself.

Okay, there will be a special franksolich award, too.

No voting on it, because the only eligible voter's.....franksolich.

[EagleKeeper]

IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou.

I wonder why I never thought of it myself.

Okay, there will be a special franksolich award, too.

No voting on it, because the only eligible voter's.....franksolich.

I can't wait for the write up on this one.

I think it should be the last award handed out so that you have plenty of time to make it sweet.

[Bad Dog]

I make a motion that we have an honorary coaches award...it will be at Franks desecration for the primitive of his choice.
It will kind of be like a best of the rest for those DUmbasses that got so close but were yet so far away. 

I saw what you did there.

[franksolich]

I can't wait for the write up on this one.

I think it should be the last award handed out so that you have plenty of time to make it sweet.

As you know, the awards are handed out between the afternoon of Christmas Eve and the early afternoon of New Year's Eve.  The top DUmmies are awarded in ascending order, from the bottom half of the top twenty up to Top DUmmie of the year.  The special awards are interspersed, depending upon which primitive won.

The franksolich award will go to a primitive who didn't win anything.

When I know the results of the voting from Mr. Wiggum (I gave him until Saturday, December 21, to get them to me), then I'll know where on the schedule to place the special awards, and that schedule will be posted.  It's the Christmas season, and many don't hang around here--this way, interested parties'll know when they should come and check it out, so they don't have to sit around twiddling their thumbs waiting and wondering.

[BattleHymn]

I can't wait for the write up on this one.

I think it should be the last award handed out so that you have plenty of time to make it sweet.

Frank puts so much hard work into writing up awards for everybody we pick, whether they are his choice or not.  He wouldn't even have to write it up every year, just only when the mood strikes him.

[Ralph Wiggum]

Frank puts so much hard work into writing up awards for everybody we pick, whether they are his choice or not.  He wouldn't even have to write it up every year, just only when the mood strikes him.

It is a labor of love.  I used to do it, and after reading through all the drivel to put it together, I almost felt like I needed to drink a bottle of whiskey to cleanse myself.

[franksolich]

It is a labor of love.

Yeah, that it most certainly is.

[Purple Sage]

Just submitted my votes.  I didn't nominate gNads for anything.  Reason?  The thought of her gives me a migraine AND I thinks she's DUmmy enough to take the awards as a compliment.  It won't happen, but I'd like to see her completely iggied this year.  Unlike most Dummies, I don't find her funny, but purely annoying; thus no vote from me for anything.

Since I had a gaping hole where gNads belonged in DOTY, I threw the coach a bone and stuck Skippy in there.  

There was also another gaping hole in the DOTY candidates.  I made a Grand Prize Winner slot at the top and put Vesta111 in it.  She would have been in my top spot if she had been allowed.  

The others were all the usual clowns.  

DainBramaged as Top DUmmy.  After all, he is who brought me here.
Amber at number 2 as she also provided great entertainment to me this year.
cali at number three.  Great balls of fire, that S/H/it has been prolific stupid.
Loconuts for obvious reasons came in fourth.
gopiscrap came in fifth.  I've often thought he might be a mole, but I still voted for him.  If you're here, my hat is off to you.

The other five in no particular order were CaliforniaPeggy, Laelth, cbayer, Pretzel_Warrior, and the Skippy.

The Willie:  cali

The Steve:  DainBramaged aka Doug Bulna, Douglas Bulna, Douglas C. Bulna of Gearhard Chevrolet fame.  (Can I post the jizz pic please?)

The Rob:  Fat Che's Little Brother (I struggled with this one and read back over past posts.  This guy is Funnie.

The Nadin:  BainsBane  (Since I refused to vote for gNads for anything.  She comes closest.)

The Group:  the 0bamacare lemmings  (Hard decision here.  I couldn't decide between them and the gun nuts.  They are equally vile.  I finally used the clock method and the Ocares won.)

[BattleHymn]

It is a labor of love.  I used to do it, and after reading through all the drivel to put it together, I almost felt like I needed to drink a bottle of whiskey to cleanse myself.

Yes, I appreciate very much what both of you do to put together these awards together each year.  I'm sure I'm not the only one.  Neither of you get paid anything to do this each year, and it takes time out of both of your lives. 

[BlueStateSaint]

It is a labor of love.  I used to do it, and after reading through all the drivel to put it together, I almost felt like I needed to drink a bottle of whiskey to cleanse myself.

I'd think that one would want to use Drano.

[franksolich]

By the way, I had to think, because Carl threw such a novel, unexpected idea in here.

When I say "the franksolich award will go to a primitive who didn't win anything," remember, a primitive who places in the bottom half of the top twenty, Top DUmmies #11-20, isn't really considered as having won anything, because those ten primitives have to share one award.

In other words, the franksolich award (not its final name, by the way) will go to a primitive who (a) wasn't selected a Top Ten DUmmie or (b) didn't win any of the special awards.

[Ralph Wiggum]

By the way, I had to think, because Carl threw such a novel, unexpected idea in here.

When I say "the franksolich award will go to a primitive who didn't win anything," remember, a primitive who places in the bottom half of the top twenty, Top DUmmies #11-20, isn't really considered as having won anything, because those ten primitives have to share one award.

In other words, the franksolich award (not its final name, by the way) will go to a primitive who (a) wasn't selected a Top Ten DUmmie or (b) didn't win any of the special awards.

Kind like the "biggest loser" award?