"A Friends Confrontation at a Family Gathering About Supporting Romney."

[Ballygrl]

I sent you a PM Kyle explaining it more.

Now here's a brilliant post by a member of Democratic Underground who got fed-up with all the bouncys lying about confronting people at the grocery store, IIRC this was done around the time that bouncys were being posted almost daily about confronting people at the grocery store and confronting senior citizens at McDonalds. A lot of the responses from fellow DU'ers were hysterical, they knew it was satire and they loved it:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1329640

Dreamer Tatum Donating Member (1000+ posts)  Journal Click to send private message to this author Click to view this author's profile Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your Ignore list    Sun Jun-19-11 07:18 PM
Original message
My grocery store smackdown.
   
So, I needed a couple of breakfast items, and I live in the reddest part of the reddest city in the reddest state
in the United States. I mean, it's nothing but McMansions, giant trucks, an late-model German sedans where I live,
all with vile bumperstickers, Truck Nutz, and everything you'd expect from a culture that values gain over everything
and everyone else. I would move, of course, but then they would win, and I have to stay here. I have to stay to stick
it to them.

Myself, I drive a paid-off 2005 Prius, and I used to get intimidated in traffic all the time. That was until it dawned
on me that all the truck drivers were compensating for incredibly small penises. When one of them cuts
me off in traffic, which is to say, ALL the time, I just hold up my thumb and forefinger about a quarter inch
apart so they can see it in their rear-view mirrors. I can't tell you the number of trucks that pull over
immediately when I do that. They know exactly what I'm referring to, and it shames them every time.

Anyway, I need some tofu and wheat germ for my usual breakfast, so I walk into the store at about seven AM. It's
packed full of people headed to work. Ordinarily, I'd feel sorry for them, but the volume or giant trucks and
German cars in the lot just made me feel glad that I work from home as a consultant to businesses that generate
green, sustainable energy from composted hemp and edamame husks. While I walked to the cooler where the tofu
is kept, I noticed a long line of angry-looking people at the donut counter. They were mostly fat and baggy-faced,
almost demanding that their donuts be boxed immediately so they could get on the road and cut off other people
while they waited for Rush Limbaugh to come on. I chuckled and thought, 'enjoy your donuts, along with the diabetes
and colon cancer, you freeptards. You don't even want single-payer, you idiots.'

The checkout line was long. Even though there are always a lot of people in that store, they never have enough
checkstands open. This is probably because the store manager wants to save payroll so he gets a bigger bonus,
because I know he sees all the expensive cars in his lot and it kills him. I'll never forget the time I overheard
him tell a stocker that he needed to clock out before he hit overtime, but that didn't mean he could go home,
because the beer cooler needed to be stocked before the football game the next day. Then he told the kid, "And
if I hear that union bullshit from you one more time, you're fired."

Anyway, I'm standing behind this behemoth guy with a giant tattoo on his bicep that I can't make out. He's
a typical suburban rethuglican: tall and fat, with enormous love handles. As he turned slightly, I was not
surprised to see that his tattoo was of a giant Ayn Rand. Seriously: an Ayn Rand tattoo. There is a RW tattoo
parlor here that advertises them on hate radio, and it's the latest thing in rethug fashion. Behind me, meanwhile,
is a guy in a knockoff Zegna suit and fake Chanel sunglasses (I know knockoffs when I see them, even though I
pretty much make all of my own clothes from hemp. When you make your own stuff, you can spot fakes easily.)
I noticed also that the guy in front of me has his keys on a belt clip, and of course there is a giant clump
of padlock keys next to a Ford key. He also has a keychain fob that I can make out as a long quote from Milton
Friedman, which I'm sure this dickhead thinks is just the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Anyway, the guy in front of us trying to pay is an immigrant worker from Mexico. I know this because some mornings
I sit outside the store with him as he waits for some of the assholes in giant trucks to offer him a day's
labor. My Spanish is just a little shaky, but I can understand it pretty well from the downloads I get of
Caracas news stations. His name is Isidro, and he's even given me a nickname: Ben Dayho. I don't know if there's
a sidekick from Mexican folk tales named Ben Dayho, or what, but I like it, and he lights up whenever I walk up
to him and say, "Hola, Isidro! Es mi, Ben Dayho!" Seems to make his day, which is the least I can do.

Isidro is buying an agua fresca, which is a fruit drink, and an apple. Or at least he's trying to buy it, because
there is some confusion at the register. The whole thing usually costs a dollar even, and Isidro is trying to
give a crumpled bill to the cashier. But I can see from the register screen (which has a picture-in-picture
of Fox News playing, naturally) that the price is now $1.10, and evidently Isidro doesn't understand. The cashier,
who this whole time has been winking at the guy with the Ayn Rand tattoo, keeps yelling, "NO! MAS!" And I see
Isidro turning beet red, not knowing what to do, surrounded by all these evil people leering at him. The irony
is that besides me, Isidro has the most healthful purchase...everyone else has what I call Freeper Chow: donuts,
sugared sodas, even beer.

I excuse myself and attempt to give Isidro the extra dime so we can all get going, but before I can, the massive
truck-driving asshole in front of me says, "Whoa, son. See this tattoo? She says we shouldn't be helping each
other. This meskin guy is on his own. And he should be - he looks illegal as hell to me, anyway." The cashier
winked at the guy again, and my blood started a fast boil. The guy behind me pretty much put the icing on the cake
when he said, "You guys are holding up the line. Do you know how much money I make? If you can't afford whatever
it is you're trying to buy, just put it down and be satisfied with whatever you stuffed into your pants anyway.
I work at Goldman Sachs. Won't be long before we own this store, but for now, hurry the **** up. My bonus is on the
line, and that Benz out there ain't free. But you'll never know that." He jingled his keys as though he was making
his point even more.

I cleared my throat with a loud AHEM and said, "Let me tell you something. Your savior may be Ayn Rand, but
I doubt you're capable of reading page one of that republican wet dream rag, and that's saying something,
because it would take a thousand Rands to equal one Gabriel Garcia Marquez on his WORST day. (I used Marquez
because I thought Isidro might recognize the name, him being Mexican and all, and I wanted to be sure that
I picked a Nobel Prize winner. My other choice was Gunther Grass, but that might have been too symbolic for
the freeper and the cashier.) And as for not helping, well, that attitude is what got us where we are now as
a country, not to mention thieves like you (I said that as I turned on my heel and pointed to the guy behind me.).
As for you ' - I pointed at the cashier - 'you should be looking out for guys like him. Since you aren't unionized,
thanks to your manager here, you're one missing dollar short of sitting on that same sidewalk outside. That's
how things are these days. And none of this is sustainable. We're losing rainforest. The seas are rising. Ice
caps are melting. Bank of America is foreclosing on people who haven't been born yet. Education has been slashed
to the degree that students use gum wrappers for textbooks. Our infrastructure is crumbling. There hasn't been
a decent movie since V is for Vendetta. And I. Blame. You."

I flipped a dime to Isidro, who caught it in midair and slammed it down on the counter. I dropped the tofu and
wheat germ on the floor, kicking off my latest boycott. I looked at the store manager and said, "Don't worry -
you'll have your pick of monster trucks soon, because assholes like everyone in this line will be selling
theirs soon to make a single house payment. Except Mr. Goldman here: oil is falling, and so will he be, from
a tall building, because of his losses."

A slow, faint clapping rose from the back of the line, which gathered into a crescendo of raucous applause. As
I walked out, I saw the men on either side of me bow their heads, and the giant freeper clasped his hand over his
Ayn Rand tattoo in shame. The Goldman guy had dialed his cell and was clearly describing me to someone on the other
line; it would probably get rough later. Not that I'm not accustomed to cracking some Blackwater skulls. As I walked
out, Isidro looked up at me with bright, shining eyes and simply said, "Gracias. Gracias, Ben Dayho. Muy Ben Dayho."
I have never been so proud as to be given a nickname by a new friend.

I'm writing all of this as I'm waiting for the news truck to show up. As I calmly walked out of the store
with my tofu and wheat germ, a woman in sweats ran up from behind me, begging me to wait. When I turned and
saw her face, without makeup, I assumed that she was just a victim of domestic violence, ie, the wife of
one of the rethugs I'd just left agape in the store. It wouldn't be the first time I helped the battered wife
of a truck-driving needledick rethug see a better way in life. It turns out, though, that she was a local news
anchor who was just buying some milk. I didn't recognize her because I got rid of my television years ago.
She gave me her card and told me she'd witnessed the entire thing, and she wanted to run a story on me one
night this week. I told her, "Look, Mindy, there are a million other people in this town that deserve a
news story more than me. But I'll do it, if for no other reason than to let people in this town know that the
tide is turning." She took her card back from me, turned it over, and wrote a phone number on the back. She
said it was her personal cell number, and I should call her sometime. I told her I'd consider it, but only
if she dyed her hair a different shade of Fox Anchor Blonde. She winked and said she suddenly realized she
needed to go back into the store for something she forgot.

I swear this happened.

[Ballygrl]

Now Kyle, here's a bouncy from DU:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1327727

TwixVoy Donating Member (1000+ posts)

Played the "personal responsibility card" at the grocery store today
   
Edited on Sun Jun-19-11 11:48 AM by TwixVoy
I have to admit - the personal responsibility card is great fun.

Most ground level republicans are uneducated, poor, and generally have made bad choices in life based on hateful personalities. They really love to blame others, and come across as if they have done everything right in life compared to everyone else. I have found that in 99% of the cases once you actually start to know a little personal information about these people the exact opposite is true. Almost always their life is a self made train wreck.

This morning I had a very interesting encounter with a republican in line at the grocery store.

So I'm standing in a line of about 4 people. The cashier and person being checked out were speaking in spanish to each other. Here's the thing - I always shop at this store and have spoken to this cashier several times before. She's a really nice person that is just working part time while going through school.

This bitter looking 50 year old white person was standing in front of me and CLEARLY said in earshot of the cashier "you need to learn to speak english. you're in america.". I think to myself this is going to be interesting. So I quietly tell her "yea I know what you mean the whole country is turning mexican. I can't even go anywhere without seeing everything in spanish it's ridiculous". All of a sudden she's completely open to me. After all we must think alike.

So I got to talking to her and asked why she felt that way. "It's because of these mexicans that I can't pay my bills. If it wasn't for them I know I would be making more money because they are taking all of our jobs like this cashier." Ok heard that one before.

So I setup my personal responsibility card. I don't say anything at all that could provoke her. I just keep casually agreeing with everything she says. I get to casually asking some questions. Turns out she hates the president and her education consists of "some bible college classes", and she's been working a customer service job at Kmart for the past 10+ years. (I've found most republicans I play this card with fall in to the same category. Hate everyone different than them, low educational attainment, low paying job, etc.)

So I ask her what she meant when she said she can't pay her bills. Turns out she had her $30K car repossessed, got in on the mortgage disaster with a NINJA loan and an interest payment only mortgage so she just lost her house, makes $10/hour, and generally made bad choices in life. Of course this was all worded to suggest none of this was her doing.

So by this point it is my turn to get checked out so I tell her "well nice talking to you I've got to get checked out now".

So while the young cashier is checking me out I say to her "Hey good to see you again. How's school coming along?" She tells me it's going along great and I ask her what her major was again. She replies "I'm getting my bachelors in nursing. I'm actually finishing at the end of the summer semester and I'm hopefully going to have a job at the hospital after that."

The racist fu** I was talking to was standing right behind me in line and could hear everything.

So I say to the cashier "Wow that's awesome. You're going to have a great job and get places in life. I know it takes a lot of hard work and intelligence to get in to nursing. You're probably going to be making six figures in no time. You know just a minute ago I was talking to some idiot loser who couldn't even make it through bible college, never had the initiative to get out of working retail, made bad choices in life and had her car that she couldn't afford repossessed and her house that she took out an interest only loan for foreclosed on, and was pissed there wasn't any jobs available at this store for her. Since you're on your way out though I bet she'd be happy to know this job is about to be available"

So I turn to the racist fu** and say to her "Hey good news. I just found out this job you wanted is about to be open. It looks like you can move on up from Kmart now." She was speechless. I then grabbed my receipt and walked out. The look on her face was priceless.

Today is looking to be a great day.

[Freeper]

Now Kyle, here's a bouncy from DU:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1327727

That one is a bouncy, but it's not an official bouncy because he was making fun of the other DUmmies for their bouncies. 

[98ZJUSMC]

how right the person wearing the Birkenstocks is   

ROFL
 
ROFL
 
ROFL
 
ROFL
 
ROFL
 


It really just writes itself.....

[Ballygrl]

That one is a bouncy, but it's not an official bouncy because he was making fun of the other DUmmies for their bouncies. 

[Chris_]

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bouncy+tale

 

[I_B_Perky]

I plan on sticking around for a while. It gets more interesting everyday.

Well Kyle... I'm sure somewhere around this site is the original "bouncy". Bouncys predated this site. A little history. The original bouncy was posted by some dummy, I think she lived in Texas, and her DU name was Bouncy Ball. I think she was a school teacher. All I really remember about it was a cop jumped out the bushes. She had all these stories about how Bush was toast, etc, in the 2004 election. They all started with "So..." and ended up with the evil fundie getting put in their place and all the people in whatever venue it was standing up and clapping.

Then the rest of the dummies joined in and the "Bouncy" was born. Kinda like an emmy or an obie.

Frank can tell you more.

Edited to add: I found the bouncy tales!!!

[Kyle Ricky]

Those bouncies are great. They had me laughing 

Thanks for posting those Ballygrl
Thanks for the link to the urban dictionary, Chris_. It was priceless 
Thanks for the link to the bouncy tales, I_B_Perky. I will be checking them out.

Hi5 to all you.

[Chris_]

Those bouncies are great. They had me laughing 

Thanks for posting those Ballygrl
Thanks for the link to the urban dictionary, Chris_. It was priceless 
Thanks for the link to the bouncy tales, I_B_Perky. I will be checking them out.

Hi5 to all you.

dandi is a member here and wrote both of them. 

You could probably find the original thread if you used the search function.  I haven't tried.

[obumazombie]

tl;dr

Ditto, with less emphasis on catfighting.

[I_B_Perky]

Those bouncies are great. They had me laughing  

Thanks for posting those Ballygrl
Thanks for the link to the urban dictionary, Chris_. It was priceless  
Thanks for the link to the bouncy tales, I_B_Perky. I will be checking them out.

Hi5 to all you.

Oh I forgot... there was this "bouncy smiley" they used. Somebody here probably got one to show you. Everybody used to laugh at it.

Edited to add: Here it is!!! 

[Kyle Ricky]

Thanks a lot, all. I really appreciate the input.   

[Ballygrl]

Edited to add: I found the bouncy tales!!!

OMG at that list!

[Ballygrl]

Whatever happened to the person named Bouncy Ball? I'm reading some of the bouncys and they're hysterical.

[jukin]

Another vital bouncy element is that the bouncy must be about a current democrat talking point. It must provide anecdotal evidence that said democrat talking point is valid. 

[JohnnyReb]

So I'm at the Gynecologists office,...to observe what they do before I allow one my wives to go there. I am a member of the religion of peace and I decide she will just have to die to protect the family honor. Obama will understand.

[Chris_]

Whatever happened to the person named Bouncy Ball? I'm reading some of the bouncys and they're hysterical.

Nobody knows.  She disappeared one day and that was it.

[formerlurker]

This story could have been broken down to three sentences - tea party cousins. Support wavered through several candidates.  Now supports Romney.   

Period.  The end. 


 

[Ballygrl]

Nobody knows.  She disappeared one day and that was it.

Oh, she wasn't banned then?

[Chris_]

I don't think so.

[IassaFTots]

I LOVE Dreamer Tatum!!!!

[Rufus2010]

romantico (4,647 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore


 A Friends Confrontation at a Family Gathering About Supporting Romney. It Gets UGLY!
Last edited Sun May 27, 2012, 12:54 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

Sorry this post is so long.

A close friend of mine told me this story and I just had to share. Is it fair to call this person a typical Romney supporter?

A friend of mine had a small family get together yesterday and her Aunts house. Most her family is Republican but usually never talks politics. Well, all but one. A cousin and her husband just can not resist to tell everyone no matter where they go that they are proud Tea Party supporters. They can not go a minute without telling the crowd or anyone who is within ear shot how much they HATE Obama.My friend and her boyfriend have been together now for about 6 years and some in the family made it clear they feel she should be married or at least engaged. You see, my friend lives with her boyfriend and the family see this is them living in sin. This is very important because it comes up this weekend.So, my friend goes on to tell the story:

'Back in January we celebrated my Uncle's 75th Birthday and this cousin of mine talked about how much she and her husband supported Michelle Bachman and Rick Perry. Those were the two they supported and talked about how God Awful Mitt Romney was. They hated the fact that he was a Massachusetts Governor and his health plan was basically Obamacare. The things they said about Mitt were just terrible. They expressed their hate towards him the same as they do with Obama.

In March we got together again this time for my grandparent's 55th anniversary. This time she was throwing her support towards Rick Santorum. They liked Newt but didn't think he could win. They thought Mitt was shameless the way his big money trashed Newt. She went off again about how dishonest and mean Mitt Romney was and swore they would not vote or support such filth. Forget they she and her husband had supported Michelle Bachman and Rick Perry. No, pretend that never even happened. Now they were one hundred percent behind Rick Santorum and he was the ONLY ONE who could beat Obama. They tried to make people think they were behind Santorum all along. The way they trashed Romney was just over the top.

So, now flash forward to this past Saturday. Memorial Day weekend. Nice little family get together. My boyfriend and I were there not even 5 minutes when my cousin and her husband came over and started in. They spoke about how much they adore Mitt Romney and how he is going to beat Obama in November. I could not keep quiet. I reminded her about how much she hated Mitt and this cousin went off on me. She said that was not true. She claimed she supported Mitt a year ago and he has been the one they supported all along. She said she liked Bachman, Gingrich, Perry, and Santorum, but they were never strong enough to beat Obama. My boyfriend even stepped in and said no, he recalled just a couple months ago how much they both hated Romney. This was really pissing them both off. Both of them raised their voices and were getting visibly angry. My Mom came over,asked what the trouble was and I told her. She told me to stop talking politics and try and get them to calm down. My boyfriend just walked away and I changed the subject. They just bought a new house and I started asking them about the house and that seemed to work for a while. Although after about 20 minutes she went off on me about how I am a typical Obama supporter who has to lie. She repeated the claim they she and her hubby have supported Romney since day one. What pissed her off was she then went around telling people how her and boyfriend were lying about her. She said she was secretly campaigning for Obama here at a family event by lying about them not supporting Romney when they said they did.

Then she began asking them when they were going to get married. She reminded everyone that they were living in sin. She asked her boyfriend if he really loved her cousin and then began asking questions trying to hint to everyone that he might be gay. She began asking us questions that were personal, cruel, and inappropriate.Then she came back to bashing Obama and telling everyone how she was lying claiming that she said all these terrible things about Romney. She said they were lies and claimed she never said a bad word about Romney. She was not letting up and no one in the family was asking her to stop or coming to our defense.So, after about 40 minutes,we left. When we left no one really said good bye or acted like they wanted us to stay. To me and my boyfriend it was clear why we were leaving so early.

We went out to eat and then to a movie. I got over it pretty fast thanks to my boyfriend. He knew how to take my mind off things. Still, I was angry and pissed. I felt like I should have said more in my defense and called out some of the lies she was saying about Obama and the Democrats. Then I thought of something.

Back in January and March, my boyfriend took his camera and shot the 75th Birthday of my Uncle and the 55th anniversary of my grandparents. It took no time to find, on both occasions we found footage of both my cousin and her husband BASHING Romney like you would never believe. The video does not lie. You can clearly see her and her husband. You can clearly hear them. I don't remember this but at one point she even made a clear death threat. We counted on both occasions and she praised Bachman and Perry and said ONE OF THOSE TWO WERE GOING TO BE THE NOMINEE. Then she bashed Romney something awful. Then, we have on tape her saying SANTORUM WILL BE THE NOMINEE, THERE IS JUST NO DOUBT ABOUT IT. She then bashed Romney something awful including a very disgusting slur towards him that even I was offended by. Between the two, we had 17 minutes of her bashing Romney.

Now, I want to upload it and send it to EVERYONE on Facebook and who was there Saturday. My boyfriend says if I do, I can NEVER go to another family gathering again. Don't know what to do.'

That's her story. I can't tell her what to do but I hope she does. She said she will send it to me if she does and if so I will post it here.

So, is this a typical Romney supporter or what?

"Whoa, hold on there n*gga, I ain't READIN' ALL THAT SHIT!"

[wasp69]

"Whoa, hold on there n*gga, I ain't READIN' ALL THAT SHIT!"