« previous next »
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 5   Go Down

Author Topic: What do you do?  (Read 7494 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
What do you do?
« on: February 11, 2011, 07:03:31 PM »
Ok, someone gets out of their car, comes on to your property at 11:30pm and smashes the snowman your kids built. You get a partial plate but know who's car it is (because they live down the street from you). What do you do?  (give me funny and mean) :popcorn:

Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline SSG Snuggle Bunny

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 23049
  • Reputation: +2233/-269
  • Voted Rookie-of-the-Year, 3 years running
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #1 on: February 11, 2011, 07:10:02 PM »
If the car has lift-up door handles...

...wipe dog-shit up into the handles.



Suntan lotion on the windshield is good too.
Logged
According to the Bible, "know" means "yes."

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2011, 07:11:26 PM »
Quote from: SGT Snuggle Bunny on February 11, 2011, 07:10:02 PM
If the car has lift-up door handles...

...wipe dog-shit up into the handles.



Suntan lotion on the windshield is good too.

vaseline works great under the windshield wipers.......just put gobs under the blades and then just sit back and fantasize about when they will need to use those wipers  :lmao:
Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline mamacags

  • Smells like teen spirit
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4281
  • Reputation: +444/-113
  • Little Miss Cranky Pants
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2011, 07:13:41 PM »
I would let the air out of their tires.
Logged
All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

Offline Thor

  • General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!
  • In Memoriam
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13103
  • Reputation: +362/-297
  • Native Texan & US Navy (ret)
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #4 on: February 11, 2011, 07:15:19 PM »
Get a can of sardines and pour down the fresh air intake for the passenger compartment (the grill looking thing below the wipers) or use milk and do the same. Come summertime...... car will be uninhabitable.

Get a  tool to remove valve stems from tires and remove all four valve stems. Discard removed valve stems.
Logged
"The state must declare the child to be the most precious treasure of the people. As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily endure almost any curtailment of liberty and almost any deprivation."- IBID

I AM your General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!

"Congress has not unlimited powers to provide for the general welfare, but only those specifically enumerated."-Thomas Jefferson

Offline DixieBelle

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12143
  • Reputation: +512/-49
  • Still looking for my pony.....
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #5 on: February 11, 2011, 07:15:30 PM »
How old is your kid? If they are of an age to play along, go knock on their door and have your kid wail and scream and cry "YOU KILLED MY FROSTY!!!!!"
Logged
I can see November 2 from my house!!!

Spread my work ethic, not my wealth.

Forget change, bring back common sense.
-------------------------------------------------

No, my friends, there’s only one really progressive idea. And that is the idea of legally limiting the power of the government. That one genuinely liberal, genuinely progressive idea — the Why in 1776, the How in 1787 — is what needs to be conserved. We need to conserve that fundamentally liberal idea. That is why we are conservatives. --Bill Whittle

Offline mamacags

  • Smells like teen spirit
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 4281
  • Reputation: +444/-113
  • Little Miss Cranky Pants
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #6 on: February 11, 2011, 07:15:48 PM »
Fill out catalog requests from online porn stores with their address
Call the mormons and tell them you want to speak to them at their address
Spread fertilizer on their yard in the shape of a body part in the spring.  They will have it forever.
Logged
All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

Offline Thor

  • General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!
  • In Memoriam
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13103
  • Reputation: +362/-297
  • Native Texan & US Navy (ret)
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2011, 07:17:28 PM »
Spray Round Up in a pattern or words of your choice......
Logged
"The state must declare the child to be the most precious treasure of the people. As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily endure almost any curtailment of liberty and almost any deprivation."- IBID

I AM your General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!

"Congress has not unlimited powers to provide for the general welfare, but only those specifically enumerated."-Thomas Jefferson

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #8 on: February 11, 2011, 07:19:57 PM »

Quote from: mamacags on February 11, 2011, 07:13:41 PM
I would let the air out of their tires.
:cheersmate:  We are so alike it's scary......except I have bigger boobs

I also thought about stuffing their mailbox full of snow and put the snow man's eyes and nose that in the form of a face so when they opened it they would know where it came from
Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline DixieBelle

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12143
  • Reputation: +512/-49
  • Still looking for my pony.....
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #9 on: February 11, 2011, 07:26:52 PM »
Oh I like it Gina!!! Do it!
Logged
I can see November 2 from my house!!!

Spread my work ethic, not my wealth.

Forget change, bring back common sense.
-------------------------------------------------

No, my friends, there’s only one really progressive idea. And that is the idea of legally limiting the power of the government. That one genuinely liberal, genuinely progressive idea — the Why in 1776, the How in 1787 — is what needs to be conserved. We need to conserve that fundamentally liberal idea. That is why we are conservatives. --Bill Whittle

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #10 on: February 11, 2011, 07:30:24 PM »
Someone's tweaking!!!! :stoner:

Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline IassaFTots

  • In WTF-istan, I am considered a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13972
  • Reputation: +768/-274
  • Oh well, I wasn't using my civil liberties anyway.
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #11 on: February 11, 2011, 07:57:35 PM »
Quote from: mamacags on February 11, 2011, 07:15:48 PM
Fill out catalog requests from online porn stores with their address
Call the mormons and tell them you want to speak to them at their address
Spread fertilizer on their yard in the shape of a body part in the spring.  They will have it forever.

Not Mormans.  Jehovah's Witnesses.....Seriously. 

On the same note as the fertilizer, grass killer. 

And forget the tires.  They might think of you first. Mineral Spirits or Fingernail polish on the paint job.  Spelling out something like "I love Men.." 
Logged
R.I.P. LC and Crockspot.  Miss you guys.

The infinite is possible at zombocom.  www.zombo.com

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." ~ Martin Luther King
 
“Political Correctness is about turning a blind eye to painful reality because your comfortable feelings are more important to you than saving lives and providing quality of life to people who work their ass off to be productive and are a benefit to this great American Dream"  ~Ted Nugent

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #12 on: February 11, 2011, 08:02:03 PM »
Quote from: IassaFTots on February 11, 2011, 07:57:35 PM
Not Mormans.  Jehovah's Witnesses.....Seriously. 

On the same note as the fertilizer, grass killer. 

And forget the tires.  They might think of you first. Mineral Spirits or Fingernail polish on the paint job.  Spelling out something like "I love Men.." 

brake fluid in a squirt gun, works great :naughty:
Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline Boudicca

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5162
  • Reputation: +413/-61
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #13 on: February 11, 2011, 08:37:25 PM »
All great suggestions.  May I add, wait a week or two until they think they've gotten away with the crime.  Then, hit 'em.

Buy an inflatable dummy, or rent one from the DUmp, knock it around some, maybe spread some ketchup all over the "body", leave it on their front lawn in the wee hours, then have an accomplice call in an anonymous report of a dead body at your neighbor's.
Don't forget to wipe any fingerprints off the dummy.
Logged
Sneaking into a country doesn't make you an immigrant any
more than breaking into someone's house makes you part of the family.
(Poster bolky from thehill.com blog discussion)

Offline IassaFTots

  • In WTF-istan, I am considered a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13972
  • Reputation: +768/-274
  • Oh well, I wasn't using my civil liberties anyway.
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #14 on: February 11, 2011, 08:47:58 PM »
Quote from: GinaBug on February 11, 2011, 08:02:03 PM
brake fluid in a squirt gun, works great :naughty:

Waiting is key, if you do it soon, they have you pegged.  Patience is a virtue, or so I have heard.   :whistling:
Logged
R.I.P. LC and Crockspot.  Miss you guys.

The infinite is possible at zombocom.  www.zombo.com

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." ~ Martin Luther King
 
“Political Correctness is about turning a blind eye to painful reality because your comfortable feelings are more important to you than saving lives and providing quality of life to people who work their ass off to be productive and are a benefit to this great American Dream"  ~Ted Nugent

Offline Gina

  • Tinker Twat
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13088
  • Reputation: +830/-102
  • Short Bus bound!
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #15 on: February 11, 2011, 08:54:49 PM »
Quote from: IassaFTots on February 11, 2011, 08:47:58 PM
Waiting is key, if you do it soon, they have you pegged.  Patience is a virtue, or so I have heard.   :whistling:

what does your name mean?   everytime I see it I think it says "I hassa farts"   :lmao:
Logged






"An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer." Phillip of Macedonia, father to Alexander.

Offline IassaFTots

  • In WTF-istan, I am considered a
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13972
  • Reputation: +768/-274
  • Oh well, I wasn't using my civil liberties anyway.
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #16 on: February 11, 2011, 08:57:29 PM »
Quote from: GinaBug on February 11, 2011, 08:54:49 PM
what does your name mean?   everytime I see it I think it says "I hassa farts"   :lmao:

That is by far the best yet.   :cheersmate:

Everyone else thinks something about tater tots.   :mental:

Acronym:  I am so sick and F-ing Tired of this shit.   O-)
Logged
R.I.P. LC and Crockspot.  Miss you guys.

The infinite is possible at zombocom.  www.zombo.com

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." ~ Martin Luther King
 
“Political Correctness is about turning a blind eye to painful reality because your comfortable feelings are more important to you than saving lives and providing quality of life to people who work their ass off to be productive and are a benefit to this great American Dream"  ~Ted Nugent

Offline Thor

  • General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!
  • In Memoriam
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13103
  • Reputation: +362/-297
  • Native Texan & US Navy (ret)
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #17 on: February 11, 2011, 09:11:58 PM »
"Revenge is a dish best served cold"......

Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan
Logged
"The state must declare the child to be the most precious treasure of the people. As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily endure almost any curtailment of liberty and almost any deprivation."- IBID

I AM your General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!

"Congress has not unlimited powers to provide for the general welfare, but only those specifically enumerated."-Thomas Jefferson

Offline CG6468

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11493
  • Reputation: +540/-210
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #18 on: February 11, 2011, 09:12:29 PM »
Crazy Glue under the wipers is always good..........  :lmao:
Logged
Illinois, south of the gun controllers in Chi town

Offline dandi

  • Live long, and piss off liberals.
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3341
  • Reputation: +553/-28
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #19 on: February 11, 2011, 10:24:41 PM »
If you know where they work, take a loaf of Italian bread, tear the end off, slide it down the antenna, let the birds take care of the rest.

Best part?  No evidence at the end of the day.

 :-)

Or you could burn their house down.
Logged
I don't want...anybody else
When I think about me I touch myself

Offline chitownchica

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2635
  • Reputation: +213/-25
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #20 on: February 11, 2011, 10:32:49 PM »
Banana in the tailpipe.

Yeah, I just watched Beverly Hills Cop again.
Logged

Offline DefiantSix

  • Set Condition One throughout the ship
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 17482
  • Reputation: +1730/-189
  • Captain, IKV Defiant
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #21 on: February 11, 2011, 10:40:05 PM »
Quote from: wasp69 on February 11, 2011, 10:24:41 PM
If you know where they work, take a loaf of Italian bread, tear the end off, slide it down the antenna, let the birds take care of the rest.

Best part?  No evidence at the end of the day.

 :-)

Or you could burn their house down.

This your kid, Wasp?  :-)

Logged
"Stand your ground. Don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here."
-- Capt. John Parker
"I'm not looking for forgiveness, and I'm way past asking permission"
-- Capt. Steve Rogers
"In this present crisis, government in not the solution to our problem, government IS the problem."
-- Ronaldus Magnus

Offline Thor

  • General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!
  • In Memoriam
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13103
  • Reputation: +362/-297
  • Native Texan & US Navy (ret)
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #22 on: February 11, 2011, 10:44:28 PM »
Bananas don't work, but a potato does....... ;)
Logged
"The state must declare the child to be the most precious treasure of the people. As long as the government is perceived as working for the benefit of the children, the people will happily endure almost any curtailment of liberty and almost any deprivation."- IBID

I AM your General Ne'er Do Well, Troublemaker & All Around Meanie!!

"Congress has not unlimited powers to provide for the general welfare, but only those specifically enumerated."-Thomas Jefferson

Offline chitownchica

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2635
  • Reputation: +213/-25
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #23 on: February 11, 2011, 10:49:32 PM »
Quote from: Thor on February 11, 2011, 10:44:28 PM
Bananas don't work, but a potato does....... ;)

Good to know for future reference  :cheersmate:
Logged

Offline dandi

  • Live long, and piss off liberals.
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3341
  • Reputation: +553/-28
Re: What do you do?
« Reply #24 on: February 11, 2011, 11:17:33 PM »
Quote from: DefiantSix on February 11, 2011, 10:40:05 PM
This your kid, Wasp?  :-)


My youngest, the princess...

 :-)
Logged
I don't want...anybody else
When I think about me I touch myself
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 5   Go Up
« previous next »