campaign thread for the Top DUmmies of 2013

[franksolich]

In case anyone forgets why nadin is really the only candidate for the "Nadin", from the vault here is one of her classic threads about the Japanese earthquake. Her arrogance is on a different plane from any other DUmmy, even the drunken Pitt. One thing that strikes me about it is how nearly all these 2011 nadinbullies are now gone:

I heartily endorse the cousin for both Top DUmmie and the nadin; I see she was nominated for the Rob too, as the funniest primitive, but no, there's been other primitives funnier than her. 

Her "I am God" attitude grates; I don't think even Hitler or Stalin or Mao or Barack or other megalomaniacs ever thought of themselves as Omniperfect as the cousin apparently thinks of herself.

She's forgotten that humility is the beginning of wisdom.

[franksolich]

You know,   is flat-out lying here, and I'm going to call her to account for it, in some way.

BainsBane (20,936 posts)   Wed Dec 4, 2013, 11:57 PM

6. Did you see that down under they insist we hate each other and that as soon as I "wrangled control" of the gun control group, I banned you?

I saw the list of banned members over there--the "protected forums" keep such lists of primitives they don't want coming into their little worlds--as did Tucker; this was only the other day, and Skippy was on that list.

After reading what was said here,   was in a position with power to unban Skippy, which is what probably happened.

I dunno why primitives bother lying, as they always get caught.  It's just easier to be honest.

[Ptarmigan]

You know,   is flat-out lying here, and I'm going to call her to account for it, in some way.

I saw the list of banned members over there--the "protected forums" keep such lists of primitives they don't want coming into their little worlds--as did Tucker; this was only the other day, and Skippy was on that list.

After reading what was said here,   was in a position with power to unban Skippy, which is what probably happened.

I dunno why primitives bother lying, as they always get caught.  It's just easier to be honest.

PhDD banned from the gun control section of DU. How ironic. 

[Tucker]

PhDD banned from the gun control section of DU. How ironic.  

Just the opposite. Jugs weaseled her way onto the group of controlling elite, where she has the power to ban others from the gun control group. Skippy was at first banned then reprieved, all at the benevolence of jugs.

[franksolich]

Skippy was at first banned then reprieved, all at the benevolence of jugs.

You know, I'm really tired of this crap, where   thinks we're stupid or something.

She had that silly intellectually-superior-to-youse-guys when she was over here; up until then, I'd been pretty neutral about her.....until she did all this "I'm smart and you're dumb" bullshit.

  needs to remember that mammary cells are not the same thing as cerebral cells.

[franksolich]

They're on the ballot, although I didn't vote for any of them, the three certifiably-insane primitives, the locust primitive, Den-Den, and Amber, and they're worthy of consideration by others.

It seems the locust primitive however is the only one still hanging around Skins's island.

I dunno what's up with Amber; she pawned her lap-top, she lost her lap-top, or her lap-top was stolen, one of these three.

As for Den-Den, it is possible--maybe not probable, but possible--that he took franksolich's advice and counsel.

Remember, I'd reminded him countless times that he could either be a primitive, or be sane.  He couldn't be both; he could be only one or the other.

For a while there, it looked as if Dennis the Menace opted for being a primitive, but now he's been gone for a while; I wonder if he's seeking true professional psychiatric help, and if so, it'd be a good thing.

But he's got to keep in mind; one can either be a primitive, or be sane.  Not both; only one or the other.

[GOBUCKS]

As for Den-Den, it is possible--maybe not probable, but possible--that he took franksolich's advice and counsel.

Or he may have taken my advice and pulled the trigger.

[franksolich]

Or he may have taken my advice and pulled the trigger.

Oh, but if anything remotely like that had happened, we would've known, the primitives brainlessly chanting, "freepers killed Den-Den, freepers killed Den-Den....."

[franksolich]

I see the big guy from Bellevue's on the ballot again this year; he seems to have replaced the sparkling old dude as a perennial ballot-choice (the sparkling old dude's up for a special award this year, but not for a spot in the Top DUmmies, so his own streak is now broken).

Or like Harold Stassen, a former governor of Minnesota, who appeared on Republican presidential primary ballots every four years 1940-1992.

Given that my fellow Nebraskan's performance on Skins's island this past year was lackluster, I don't think he even deserves Top DUmmie #18, #19, or #20, the lowest rungs in Top DUmmiedom.  I wouldn't throw away a vote for him; any one of the lumpenunterprimitiven on the ballot deserves it more.

I dunno what happened to the big guy, why he faded.  It's possible that since cops now read him, and he of course works for the Omaha Police Department, having failed in his attempt to get aboard the disability gravy-train, he's not as bold in posting as he used to be.

Which is our loss--he did after all provide much comedy material for the inventory of the DUmpster--but for him, probably good. 

Maybe the big guy's learned a lesson we here learned years ago, decades ago, and adapted to it--speech is free, but words do have consequences, sometimes unexpected, even unpleasant, ones.  One can't just shoot off one's mouth saying outrageous or stupid things, and not draw flak for it.

<<<shoots off mouth all the time.

<<<expects unexpected, even unpleasant, consequences because of it.

<<<draws flak.

<<<accepts, adapts, and moves on. 

[Tucker]

Oh, but if anything remotely like that had happened, we would've known, the primitives brainlessly chanting, "freepers killed Den-Den, freepers killed Den-Den....."

I don't know about that. Look at Doug Bulna, AKA Dainbramaged. He could had a heart attack and died while sitting on the commode taking a crap. The 99% on the island would go Dainbramaged who. Never heard of him.

To the best of my knowledge, no one has ever asked about his absence. Even the lurkers that have read his misadventures here at the cave. That tells you something.

Remember the DUmp is made up of 6,000 Narcissists. The only important people in their miserable lives is themselves.

[franksolich]

You know, there's some good groups, some excellent groups, up for the group award:

the anti-gun nuts
the bullies
the cooking and baking primitives
the exiles to OldElmTree
the gay mafia
the moles
the 0bamacare lemmings
the wish-for-a-dupe beggars

The anti-gun nuts and the gay mafia are long long overdue for recognition, but one's surprised that the women's-libber Gestapo wasn't nominated too.

The bullies won a spot in in the bottom half of the Top DUmmies a couple of years ago.

The cooking and baking primitives by far have been the most colorful cast of characters, but they began fading with the introduction of DU3, and dear old sweet Lu as the hostess of that forum.  Nothing against dear old sweet Lu, who's an improvement over the vile old hate-filled hippywife Mrs. Alfred Packer, but she's no leader; she doesn't hardly post anything, and if the leader shows a lack of enthusiasm for something, so too do the followers.

One suspects that's why the sparkling old dude hangs around hardly at all any more; he and his trophy wife used to be among the most-prolific and entertainng posters in the cooking and baking forum, but slowed their pace when dear old sweet Lu took over the helm.

Their attitude was probably writ all over their faces whenever they showed up in the cooking and baking forum; "well, if dear old sweet Lu, who's the leader here, doesn't post original topics and comment, why should we?"

That's why the DUmpster here flourishes and prospers; the two leaders here, SGT Snuggle Bunny and Freeper take an avid interest in what's going on, and are always posting original topics and commenting.  And the rest of us follow them.  As long as their own enthusiasm doesn't flag, neither will ours.

It's very sad, what's happened to the cooking and baking forum.  Once the liveliest "small" forum on Skins's island, it's eroded away to about the same traffic and level of interest as the cobweb-infested deaf and hard-of-hearing forum there.

[franksolich]

I don't know about that. Look at Doug Bulna, AKA Dainbramaged. He could had a heart attack and died while sitting on the commode taking a crap. The 99% on the island would go Dainbramaged who. Never heard of him.

To the best of my knowledge, no one has ever asked about his absence. Even the lurkers that have read his misadventures here at the cave. That tells you something.

Remember the DUmp is made up of 6,000 Narcissists. The only important people in their miserable lives is themselves.

That's very true; the primitives act as if only each of themselves exists, that nobody else does.

It's shown in the monotonous repetition of campfires lit on Skins's island, where there's dozens, scores, in a few case hundreds, of campfires involving the same topic, but a primitive doesn't want to be caught dead commenting at another primitive's campfire; he wants his own, and he wants to be the one starting it.

Only my good pal Manny, the Manny Goldstein primitive, seems immune from such narcissism......and in being humble, Manny has what are some of the largest and most-active campfires blazing away.  The guy's got no ego; the message is more important than himself.  It's not about Manny; it's about whatever issue my good pal brings up.

It must be odd, being a primitive, one person among circa 5,000 others, and utterly unaware, uncaring, of the existence of all these others.  It still freaks me that more than two years after the apparently-self-inflicted death of Chief S itting Bull, the Greatest Primitive Ever, his neighbor Atman probably isn't even aware he died.

[franksolich]

An addition to the above: one recalls one primitive--a lumpenunterprimitiven, so his name escapes me--who whined that we "know more about" the primitives than the primitives do themselves.

"Why" is easy to understand; we pay attention to those around us, while primitives pay attention only to their own wretched miserable individual selves.

[Tucker]

It's shown in the monotonous repetition of campfires lit on Skins's island, where there's dozens, scores, in a few case hundreds, of campfires involving the same topic, but a primitive doesn't want to be caught dead commenting at another primitive's campfire; he wants his own, and he wants to be the one starting it.

That's one of my pet peeves. I hate it where there is a big breaking story or event. Especially if it's a nonevent to decent and civilized people. It's useless to go DUmpster diving as there is page after page of campfires covering the same topic. Many with identical headlines.

Then you have the DUmbass that C&P's the same reply on each and every thread. He types one reply and gets credit for 200 posts.

[franksolich]

Ooops, I went off on a tangent, neglecting to public-relationsize my own choice for the group award, the moles, real and imagined.

On the surface, the moles probably don't seem all that prominent, but underneath, they're probably the biggest thing affecting the conduct and behavior of the primitives.  The primitives probably notice only circa 5-10% of the manipulation that goes on, but that's enough to give decent and civlized people plenty of amusement and entertainment.

There's real moles, and there's "moles" that are figments of the primitives' paranoid imaginations; I'd say the latter sort of mole has the biggest influence on events on Skins's island.

[franksolich]

Then you have the DUmbass that C&P's the same reply on each and every thread. He types one reply and gets credit for 200 posts.

I dunno if this is here or there, or even relevant, but anyway, Fat Che, the long-ago-mausoleumed "benburch" primitive, used to write original pieces and post them.

And then three or four months later, he'd repost the same literary creation as if it were brand-new.

And then he'd do it a third time, and a fourth time.....

Fat Che wasn't an idiot when it came to manipulation of the primitives; he knew that given their short-term memories, the primitives weren't likely to notice they'd already read the same thing before.

[GOBUCKS]

Oh, but if anything remotely like that had happened, we would've known, the primitives brainlessly chanting, "freepers killed Den-Den, freepers killed Den-Den....."

No way. No one knows or cares about Dennis.

If he quit coming in to work, they'd just figure he was having one of his breakdowns; they must be accustomed to that by now.

He'd be one of those victims they find in the spring when the Michigan snows begin to melt.

[Tucker]

I dunno if this is here or there, or even relevant, but anyway, Fat Che, the long-ago-mausoleumed "benburch" primitive, used to write original pieces and post them.

Then there's Pam Dawson, who doesn't even bother to compose them the first time. She just "borrows" the post from someone else then puts her name to it.

It's that kind of initiative that gets one elected as a DOTY; a trait that's sorely lacking by those that inhabit skimmer's island today. 

[franksolich]

Then there's Pam Dawson, who doesn't even bother to compose them the first time. She just "borrows" the post from someone else then puts her name to it.

You know, this is what drives me nuts about dear old sweet Lu in the cooking and baking forum.

She doesn't post much, even though as hostess of the forum, she should, really, be the top poster there, the leader.

Her "what's for supper" campfires, for example, consist of just the title line.  She expects the drones to explain in long and explicit detail what they're doing for chow, but she won't set the example by describing what's on the supper-table in her own place.

Dear old sweet Lu is a reasonably-ancient woman who lives in the mountains and forests of western North Carolina-eastern Tennessee, with her husband, bewhiskered Bill with the face of a Pennsylvania Dutch farmer, who works at the local sawmill.  Dear old sweet Lu appears to be a pretty sociable person.  Dear old sweet Lu is "into" sorcery and witchcraft and somesuch.  Dear old sweet Lu is afflicted with a list of ailments half a mile long.

She has more going on in her life to write about, than I do.

<<<if were dear old sweet Lu, would be writing a mile a minute in the cooking and baking forum, the consequence being substantially-increased readership and participation there.

But no; she's the queen bee; work is for "other people" to do.

[GOBUCKS]

To me, Pam Dawson aka greenbriar/demtenjeep is by far the outstanding candidate for the Will Pitt award, the Willie.

It's the DUmp Hall of Fame, and Pam is a towering figure at the DUmp.

If you were to list up the top 50 bouncy tales in DUmp history, I'd wager to say that Pam would be responsible for 20 of them.

She is a pathological liar, a plagiarist, and the victim of a cruel genetic accident, and those are all near the top of qualfications for an outstanding DUmp democrat.

Just consider a tiny sampling of Pam's contributions to the DUmp:

* Attempted adultery on a cruise ship
* Drunk living in the basement
* Death of foul-mouthed Grandma Bonnie
* Beatings from her bullet-headed husband
* Terminal gut rot with all the symptoms
* Five-story home, sleeping fifty, although looking like a starter home on Google Earth
* Holli escaping on her eighteenth birthday
* Spooky the cat owns a Glock
* Brush with death at the laundry  mat.
* Micromanaging jerk of a principal
* Black student wants to be her slave
* Demotion to guarding an "alternative school"
* Another cruise, and photos of a knockoff Coach purse
* Stories about deadbeat sisters and brother
* Using her "stimulus check" for yet another cruise
* Holli secretly enlisting in the Army
* Hates Holli
* Loves Holli
* Describes sex on twentieth anniversary

And on and on and on. And virtually every word of her stories is untrue.

Pam's mug should be on the DUmp's Mount Trashmore.

No candidate could be more deserving. Compare Pam's bona fides with last year's winner, Grayson, who has never actually made a single DUmp post himself.

Pam Dawson/greenbriar/demtenjeep for the Willie.

[franksolich]

Great boosterism for Pamela, GOBUCKS.

There's all this, too, courtesy njpines back in September 2009:

http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,34167.0/

greenbriar  (1000+ posts)      Wed Sep-23-09 09:42 PM
Original message
 
Just when you think all decency is lost in this younger generation something changes your mind...see I teach 8th graders

Today we were discussing the "middle passage" and reality as a slave and we got very graphic and detailed.

Now...before we go any further...this particular class has a bunch of "personalities" and about 5 kids get really irritated.

Today one black girl raised her hand and stated the following:

Mrs. Greenbriar, I don't mean to sound ungrateful or anything but I think I would rather have lived then. I know I would have been a slave but At least people had respect and values and morals and did not act like fools or idiots...

WOW

I told her well XXX that would have put us on different sides, she said no Mrs. Greenbriar, I feel you would have been one of those slave owners that would have risked everything to teach us to read and write and better our lives

Tangerine LaBamba  (1000+ posts)      Wed Sep-23-09 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
 
5. A fifth-grade girl  talking like that?

Choosing slavery?

A black girl, eleven or twelve years old, in America, told you that she'd prefer to have lived as a slave because today's culture is too crass for her?

Who are her parents, and what has she been taught about slavery? Does she know exactly what it was? What it entailed?

I'm sure you would have been a most benevolent slave owner, Mrs. Greenbriar, but I have trouble believing that any child with a functioning brain would make that choice.

Or even talk like that......................................

[Pretzel Warrior]

She used to be a lot more frequent; in fact, she was one of the top primitives in the cooking and baking forum.

But when dear old sweet Lu took over the forum, Lu decided that because she had the title, she didn't have to do any work in it; all she had to do was sit around like a regal queen bee while the drones started the topics and made the comments.

It had an obvious effect on grasswire--and other formerly prolific posters in the cooking and baking forum--who, when seeing Lu wasn't doing any work, thought, "well, why should I, if she's not?"

And hence the unhappy decline of that forum, once the most lively "small" forum on Skins's island, which provided the DUmpster with tons of comedy material.

that's pretty pathetic. trolling the cooking and baking forum? You guys need a new hobby.

[Tucker]

that's pretty pathetic. trolling the cooking and baking forum? You guys need a new hobby.

That's where we find the exotic way to cook Rahmen Noodles.

[Freeper]

that's pretty pathetic. trolling the cooking and baking forum? You guys need a new hobby.

It's like watching monkeys at the zoo, only they fling less poo than DUmmies do.

[BattleHymn]

It's like watching monkeys at the zoo, only they fling less poo than DUmmies do.

The monkeys are also much less likely to stick things into inappropriate places.