Congratulations to Systematic Chaos, the #08 Top DUmmie of 2012, and so well-deserved!
This year’s award matches the Las Vegas Leviathan’s performance in 2009, in which he was also #08 Top DUmmie of that year.
The Las Vegas Leviathan is circa 44 years old, and lives in Las Vegas, where he once worked as a card-dealer in a casino. Unfortunately, one of the fringe benefits of working there was that one could get all one wished to eat from the casino kitchen, and the Las Vegas Leviathan grew rather enormous, until he couldn’t work any more, as the casino ran out of space in the basement to set up 4x4 posts to support the floor underneath him.
The Las Vegas Leviathan has lost weight since, and can be viewed on various youtubes here:
http://www.youtube.com/user/PlantBasedWeightLoss/videosThe Las Vegas Leviathan is married to Jeanette, who supports him, along with the rest of we taxpayers, because he adamantly refuses to go back to working for a living, despite all the encouragement, helpful hints, and job-leads that have been posted for him here in the DUmpster.
He and Jeanette have a roommate, “Joe,†who ostensibly is behemothic in girth too. Joe’s relationship to the pair remains a mystery; perhaps the Las Vegas Leviathan owes him something, I dunno.
There’s good reason to suspect that during the height of his tonnage, the Las Vegas Leviathan developed agoraphobia, the morbid fear of going out into the world, as he does seem to spend all his days and nights sequestered in that dark, cramped, windowless apartment, playing computer games.
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The Las Vegas Leviathan is one of the very few primitives who actually came here to conservativecave and registered and posted. It’s nothing for decent and civilized people to go and hang around primitive message-boards, but for a primitive to come to a message-board habituated by decent and civilized people, well, that takes a great deal of courage on the part of the primitive, given that the primitives tend to turn hostile towards other primitives who’ve made contact with “the other side.â€
His social intercourse with us can be found here:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,81605.0.htmlIt’s long, but it’s well worth reading.
However, the Las Vegas Leviathan stopped commenting after the thread was moved from the DUmpster to the Mind-Numbing Stupidity forum; perhaps he thought he was being insulted with that move, but there was another reason for it; to make lurking primitives aware that there’s s-o-o-o-o-o much more to conservativecave than just the Dumpster; there’s, like, about 60 other forums here.
Primitives, when coming over here, dash immediately to the DUmpster, paying no attention at all to all the good material, the wealth of information, that’s to be found in other forums on this site.
The primitives really need to acquire a broader world-view, to explore new things and new ideas.
One supposes one could point out that the primitives are narcissists, small-minded people interested only in reading about their own selves, and so the rest of conservativecave couldn’t possibly interest them.
True, the primitives are narcissists, interested only in their own selves, but it needs pointed out that the primitives from Skins’s island are discussed in forums on conservativecave other than just the DUmpster.
For example, there’s a thread in another forum here, in which individual primitives are described and discussed; the thread was started just a few days ago, and last I checked, it had 4,009 views and 1,314 comments. It’s full of all sorts of spicy, juicy, crunchy details.
The primitives have no idea how much they’re missing out on, but that’s what happens when one goes around life voluntarily wearing blinders on the sides of both eyes, going to only one forum here.
Too bad for the primitives.
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One of the Las Vegas Leviathan’s pet causes on Skins’s island is the environment; he’s all for the environment and against anything that harms it.
And here one must embark upon description of a rather, uh, delicate subject.
The subject might be offensive to some--if not many--and so if one’s the sensitive sort, franksolich suggests one quit reading now, and go on to reading something else.
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When franksolich was in college, there was a free “underground†Marxist-Leninist-Trotskyite newspaper in Lincoln, Nebraska, the now-defunct
Lincoln Gazette. It was passed out by a bunch of ageing hippies, and decent and civilized people ate it up…..for amusement and entertainment.
One time there was a cartoon in this newspaper, a picture of a man standing by a mountain of…..something.
The text to the cartoon mentioned that the average human being disgorges 11,000 pounds of solid wastes in his life-time.
That’s a lot of shit.
The newspaper gave no source for that assertion, but I filed it away in the memory in case it might be useful some day. And so now it has, thirty years later, after I began wondering a few years ago how much chow the Las Vegas Leviathan was porking down. What goes in must come out, after all.
And the Las Vegas Leviathan has wolfed down a lot, in his life.
I was however bothered that there had been no source for that long-ago Marxist-Leninist-Trotskyite allegation, and so had to nadin the matter. Gingerly and with much paranoia, lest Google think franksolich has a “thing†about the stuff, and Barack Milhous’s internet police categorize franksolich as an, uh, individual with peculiar tastes.
Well, I can report that the long-ago assertion is probably true, given that such nadined sources quote anywhere between 9,000 and 13,000 pounds as the “average†of excreted human solid-wastes.
Okay, that’s the “average†person; but what of an individual who’s eaten considerably more than the “average†person? Surely the Las Vegas Leviathan’s put down enough to feed an army.
My God, he’s probably pumped out a whole Mount Everest of it.
And so one’s aghastly compelled to ask, how’s that being good to the environment?
Alas, poor overburdened Mother Gaia!
