You know, Contrary1 should be thanking her in-laws. It's a bad habit to get into and sets up poor thinking habits that only lead to more need for handouts.
As Napoleon Hill wrote: Every adversity, every failure and every heartache carries with it the seed of an equivalent or a greater benefit.
If we don't look for this seed, we never find it and thus it never grows.
And as Charles Haanel wrote in The Master Key System: The student who learns that power comes from within, that he is weak only because he has depended on help from the outside, and who unhesitatingly throws himself on his own thought, instantly rights himself, stands erect, assumes dominant attitude, and works miracles.
Beautiful! So Contrary1 and her husband are very blessed people. They have a great opportunity here.