primitives try to cheat on drug test administered by prospective employer

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=218x3977

Oh my.

This bonfire was lit some months ago, but's still burning.

Hello_Kitty  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:22 PM
Original message
 
Uh, my "friend" ate a pot brownie at a party Saturday night and has a drug test tomorrow

"She" had no idea that her prospective employer would send her a letter via express mail demanding a drug test within 24 hours. She is NOT a regular pot user by any stretch of the imagination but they happened to have some tasty brownies at the party she went to and she had one. Not sure how much weed was in the brownie, but it didn't seem to give "her" much of a buzz. The last time she partook of the fine bud was probably about 3 years prior.

How long does it REALLY stay in your system if you...uh...I mean "she" only had a small amount?

Is there anything that can be done to obscure its presence in the urine?

Does eating it differ from smoking it, as regards drug tests?

One suspects the cat litter primitive is describing her own predicament.

pscot  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:26 PM
Response to Original message
 
1. It persists for a long time

I've heard there are substances that mask it, but I know of no specifics. Google High Times. You might find a lead there.

The Rita Hayworth primitive:

Tangerine LaBamba  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:26 PM
Response to Original message
 
2. Oh, man..............

I have no idea but that's as sneaky a move as I've ever heard of - Express Mail, 24 hours - that's slick. Very slick.

I hope your friend does all right.

Hello_Kitty  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:38 PM
Response to Reply #2
 
15. No shit, huh? 

The PR person said to expect a "package" in the mail Monday morning but not what was in it. Mind you, this is a sales position. Not only is there no public safety hazard of any kind, but salespeople are the biggest bunch of self-medicators on the planet. 

movonne  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:27 PM
Response to Original message
 
3. From what I heard on Judge Judy ....if they take a hair follicle it is in there for months...

orestes (501 posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:27 PM
Response to Original message
 
4. Could always try and get urine from someone who doesn't use and somehow try to smuggle it in to the testing facility. Otherwise, your "friend" might be up a creek.

nichomachus (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:30 PM
Response to Original message
 
5. It persists 30 days in the urine -- longer in a hair follicle test

This is why the gang boys always have shaved heads and bodies -- since many of them are subject to no-notice hair follicle tests.

Your "friend" could always claim that her religion forbids her to give bodily fluids to strangers. Someone has actually used that.

Otherwise -- "she's" probably screwed.

JonLP24  (1000+ posts)      Thu Apr-09-09 05:47 AM
Response to Reply #5
 
34. 30 days for prolonged use

3-5 for small useage. I can vouch for that number. I passed a piss test conducted by the Army shortly before my enlistment after 3 days of last taking a hit. Also whenever I went on two weeks leave I would only smoke during the first week and the second 7 days was enough time to pass any urine tests. They are pretty high tech going down to the actual amount of THC or whatever is in the urine.

The legendary herb primitive:

Mythsaje  (1000+ posts)        Sun May-17-09 02:47 AM
Response to Reply #34
 
38. You win the prize...

Everyone else is a bit off the mark.

It depends on frequency of use. Taking a few hits once or twice a month gave me the capacity to pass a test roughly ten days after my last hit. I was a bit worried, but I was able to repeat it quite easily.

billyoc  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:30 PM
Response to Original message
 
6. It's not water soluble, and can stay in your system for months.

Your friend is ****ed.

LeftyMom  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:31 PM
Response to Original message
 
7. Your "friend" should have had the good sense to abstain while job hunting. 

Mandatory drug testing in jobs where there is no safety reason for it is stupid, but in this job market beggars can't be choosers.

Your "friend" is screwn.

LeftyMom  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:37 PM
Response to Reply #12
 
14. Stay clean while you're looking for work. Get hired, then go celebrate. 

If you don't want good advice than don't post a thread, and please don't whine when you don't get the job after your hot piss test. Oops, I mean when your "friend" fails her whiz quiz.

Hello_Kitty  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:42 PM
Response to Reply #14
 
17. Yeah, having a pot brownie every few years makes a person a drug-addict who needs to get "clean" 

And your advice, while perfectly good before the fact, is virtually useless now.

LeftyMom  (1000+ posts)        Mon Mar-16-09 09:46 PM
Response to Reply #17
 
19. Whose posts are you reading?

I said that you need to abstain while you're looking for a job. I didn't call you a drug addict. Way to ****ing overreact.

Wow.  For a mom, the primitive's got a rather, uh, earthy tongue.

Demobrat  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 09:52 PM
Response to Reply #13
 
22. So drink a LOT of cranberry juice and water.

It's your, I mean her, only hope.

panader0  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 10:02 PM
Response to Original message
 
24. Stay home sick.

Once, on a big construction job, a mobile home style testing lab pulled up to test us bricklayers. I picked up my tools, went to my truck and drove home. I came back in two days and the testing was over. It's different in construction. On another job I was a foreman and the boss suggested drug tests. He decided not to when he learned he would lose more than half the crew of 120 men.

Hello_Kitty  (1000+ posts)      Tue Mar-17-09 12:11 AM
Response to Reply #24
 
30. Seriously, this a sales job. 

This is the first time I've ever seen a sales position demand drug screening.

Salespeople are literally the most self-medicating crowd I've ever seen. If they were really concerned about people being incapacitated on the job, they'd test for alcohol.

hedgehog  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 10:53 PM
Response to Original message
 
27. What are the odds if your friend calls up human relations and tells a tale of woe about some jackass at a party who thought it'd be fun to sneak so loaded brownies into the party without telling people? Are loaded brownies funny tasting or something?

lurky (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 11:21 PM
Response to Original message
 
28. If "she" doesn't smoke often, "she" should be ok.

Especially if the brownie was weak. It's habitual smokers who build up a lot in their system. To be on the safe side, she should drink lots of fluids to flush her system, especially cranberry juice. And she should make sure not to give her first pee of the morning. She should drink a lot of water or coffee that morning so that they get the watered-down version. Maybe take a multivitamin so it doesn't look too watery.

Also, does your friend take a lot of Ibuprofen? Ibuprofen can cause false positives in drug tests. If so, when she fills out the form that asks what medications she has been taking, she should definitely mention that she has been taking lots of Advil over the last few days for a pulled muscle, back pain, or whatever. That way, if the test shows a trace amount of pot, they will know that it is really just a false positive from the Ibuprofen.

abbeyco  (510 posts)      Tue Mar-17-09 01:08 AM
Response to Original message
 
31. I work for a group that does New Hire drug screens

She can drink all the stuff she wants - tea, water, golden seal - whatever. The unfortunate part is that she'll probably give a 'dilute' test, meaning that she had enough liquids to dilute the test and they'll want a re-test.

Options are:

1. Drink up a ton ahead of time and then lie and say she's diabetic and drinks an inordinate amount of fluids, enough to screw her drug screen

2. Lie that she was at a party with several smokers and she has second hand intox. Depending on the amount in the brownie, this might be viable and if she admits in advance, she might be okay

3. Lie and say she ate a brownie her 'friends' made to share in the joy of celebrating her new job; her 'friends' didn't make her aware of ingesting the pot until after she shared the 'celebration' cake/brownies. It's not a great defense, but if the company has any tolerance at all, this might be a viable explanation.

I work in recruiting and agree that a drug screen isn't the best judge of character or to determine qualifications for a job, but 9 of 10 employers are using them now and in this job market, there really isn't time to celebrate before meeting all of the qualifications for the job - sales oriented or not....it's up to the employer and usually an insurance and safety issue for doing a drug screen.

Don't want to be a downer or pass judgment - that's just the way it is and I wish your friend best of luck.

iamthebandfanman (1000+ posts)        Thu Mar-26-09 10:58 PM
Response to Original message
 
33. try GNC store since its such short notice.

ask for a product called Herbal Clense..the drink, not the pills.

could go either way, but worth a shot.

worked for me.

[BannedFromDU]

     Want to know what an HR department thinks when someone says, "I might have eaten a brownie that had pot in it, but I don't use drugs."?

     1. This person hangs around people who use drugs enough to put them in brownies.
     2. This person is a pothead trying to troll for an excuse.
     3. This person is accustomed to having illegal substances around them on a recreational basis.


     There is no good outcome to any of those.

     Lurking DUmmies, a word of advice: if you're subject to a drug test, don't do drugs.

[GOBUCKS]

This DUmmy has a problem. There is one solution, used by most male DUmmies, but I'm not sure the fine folks at Whizzinator make a female model.

[djones520]

     Want to know what an HR department thinks when someone says, "I might have eaten a brownie that had pot in it, but I don't use drugs."?

     1. This person hangs around people who use drugs enough to put them in brownies.
     2. This person is a pothead trying to troll for an excuse.
     3. This person is accustomed to having illegal substances around them on a recreational basis.


     There is no good outcome to any of those.

     Lurking DUmmies, a word of advice: if you're subject to a drug test, don't do drugs.

Better yet, just DON'T DO DRUGS!   

[Freeper]

     Want to know what an HR department thinks when someone says, "I might have eaten a brownie that had pot in it, but I don't use drugs."?

     1. This person hangs around people who use drugs enough to put them in brownies.
     2. This person is a pothead trying to troll for an excuse.
     3. This person is accustomed to having illegal substances around them on a recreational basis.


     There is no good outcome to any of those.

     Lurking DUmmies, a word of advice: if you're subject to a drug test, don't do drugs.

Yeah I can imagine the hr person rolling his/ her eyes and thinking "yeah right".

[Freeper]

This DUmmy has a problem. There is one solution, used by most male DUmmies, but I'm not sure the fine folks at Whizzinator make a female model.

I dont even wanna know what sexual purpose that device is used for. 



edited to remove link in quote

[franksolich]

This DUmmy has a problem. There is one solution, used by most male DUmmies, but I'm not sure the fine folks at Whizzinator make a female model.

http://www.thealsshop.com.

The Whizzinator was mentioned by some primitives at the bonfire, but I didn't bring it here for lack of space.

Apparently it doesn't deliver as promised--much like the primitives--and the originators are in deep doo-doo for false advertising--much like the primitives should be, with all their conceits of being "morally superior," "more intelligent," "socially conscious," &c., than decent and civilized people.

[mamacags]

Why would a sales person who has easy access to cash registers, credit cards, and merchandise ever need a drug test?  If she is too stupid to know the answer to that one then she needs a job that only requires her to move cow poo from one area to another.

[thundley4]

I liked the fact that most of the DUmmies replied with:  "she", "your friend", they know she's a druggie. 

[Tucker]

I liked the fact that most of the DUmmies replied with:  "she", "your friend", they know she's a druggie. 

The drug infested cat never denied it either.

[tuolumnejim]

panader0  (1000+ posts)      Mon Mar-16-09 10:02 PM
Response to Original message
 
24. Stay home sick.

Once, on a big construction job, a mobile home style testing lab pulled up to test us bricklayers. I picked up my tools, went to my truck and drove home. I came back in two days and the testing was over. It's different in construction. On another job I was a foreman and the boss suggested drug tests. He decided not to when he learned he would lose more than half the crew of 120 men.

If I had a whole crew that doping themselves silly I'd fire them all on the spot, just think of the insurance liabilty when one of them does something stupid. 

[USA4ME]

I suggest the greeting feline primitive injest a whole bunch of cocaine.  That'll make those pesky questions about her marijuana use magically disappear.

.

[Ralph Wiggum]

This is not a new admission for those who've known me on these message boards for a few years, but I've dabbled with a variety of drugs in my lifetime.  Mostly in college, but I'll admit that gotten silly and smoked pot once in a great while since.

Sometime in the summer of 2002, I got high with a few friends at a small party at one of their houses.  Just hanging out, drinking and shooting the shit when someone decided to pull out a bag of dope.

I changed jobs that winter, and after accepting their offer was told that I'd need to take a drug test.  I had kind of forgotten about that one night, and during the drive to give my urine sample, I remembered.  I almost freaked out, not having any clue how long drugs stay in your system and what have you.  Of course I passed the test.

I just find it interesting and not a bit surprising that so many DUmmies are experts on the matter of how long certain drugs stay in your system, what to take to mask the results, etc.

[Texacon]

When I was an iron worker I worked around a LOT of guys who smoked pot.  A lot.  Every single time the guy would come out to test (which wasn't often because the companies didn't want to KNOW they had a problem then have to deal with it) but every time they came out to test the first thing out of these guys mouths was;

"Oh MAN!  I haven't smoked in 6 months but when I went home this time ...."  Every time, without fail.

KC

[Rebel]

I hate to admit it, but I hope this fool loses this opportunity. She knew the damn risks yet still took the chance. These idiots need to start taking life ****ing seriously and realize that there are consequences to their stupid ass decisions.

[Texacon]

If I had a whole crew that doping themselves silly I'd fire them all on the spot, just think of the insurance liabilty when one of them does something stupid. 

Which is exactly why a lot of the companies I worked for didn't test.  They didn't want to have to deal with the problem and if they didn't know they had one, then there was nothing to deal with. 

When I was working in Hawaii the whole friggin' crew I was working with was smoking dope on the job and we were working 300' off the ground.  I stayed the hell away from them.  The foreman was trying to get me to put whiskey in my thermos!   

KC

[Vagabond]

If the DUmmie really only had that bit, then yes 3 - 5 days is the longest it will stay in her system.  I have heard copious amounts  of either cranberry juice and vinegar along with copious amounts of water will flush out the kidneys, blatter, and urinary tract enough to pass a urinalysis.  I do not know, but I suspect the vinegar method will throw a test far enough out to register.

Of course since this is probably a contracted lab, she could probably get some "clean" urine, though very close to the time she needs it, then just pass it through the window.  Of course, then she has to deal with the fact that someone else knows of her underhanded dealings.

[thundley4]

My employer fought the union to get drug testing into the contract, more exactly, the "union" was resisting, but most of us employees were okay with it. Anyway, we had the testing in the contract for several years and no one was ever tested. The company mainly wanted it just to tell customers that we had a drug testing policy. 

Several years ago, the company was pushed into joining a local group of companies with mandated random sampling. Now at least 1 or 2 people are tested each month, and there are only about 40 of us in the shop. Two years ago I was tested 3 times within 6 months, but haven't been tested since.

[BadCat]

The DUmmies problem is that the THC they test for is fat soluble.  It is absorbed into the fat tissues and hence has a fairly long life PARTICULARLY IF the person is somewhat overweight.  

From what I've seen of the DUmmies, that brownie could still be showing up next year.

Also, this person ate, not smoked this pot.  She's dead for a test for at least a month, no matter how thin she may be or what she may eat/drink to try to cleanse her system.

[JohnnyReb]

Ain't that just like a DUmmie, pissed away another job before "she" even got it.

[YupItsMe]

     Want to know what an HR department thinks when someone says, "I might have eaten a brownie that had pot in it, but I don't use drugs."?

     1. This person hangs around people who use drugs enough to put them in brownies.
     2. This person is a pothead trying to troll for an excuse.
     3. This person is accustomed to having illegal substances around them on a recreational basis.


     There is no good outcome to any of those.

     Lurking DUmmies, a word of advice: if you're subject to a drug test, don't do drugs.

  Sadly, I thinka lot of them just find it simpler to just not work.   

[thundley4]

  Sadly, I thinka lot of them just find it simpler to just not work.   

Which is why most of them are against drug testing for people on welfare.

[Doc Savage]

Why would a sales person who has easy access to cash registers, credit cards, and merchandise ever need a drug test?  If she is too stupid to know the answer to that one then she needs a job that only requires her to move cow poo from one area to another.

But on the other hand, going to a bar and pounding tall boys all night and doing shooters is not disqualifying.  I know, alcohol is legal.  I get that.  The issue is that if a couple of tokes on the weekend are grounds for not hiring, heavy use of alcohol should be too.  I guess 20 years of military service watching the chief get hammered at lunch and still get promoted to senior chief and the hard charging 3rd class that comes off leave and gets popped on a piss test and booted just rubbed me the wrong way.  Gotten a little (no actually a lot) bit libertarian on this issue as I get older. 

[happy1ga]

I take strong pain meds for several conditions. I have to see a pain specialist every month and get pee tested every three or so, randomly. I don't take or use anything besides what I am prescribed, of course, but by law if anything shows up other than your prescribed meds, the doctor has to ouster you. I nearly freaked when I was told months ago that something had come up in my urine that looked like crystal meth. Turned out it wasn't even my urine. Nice, huh? I  also liked how sales people are such known medicators. What kind of sales? Arby's? Kmart? I have never known anyone in big time sales jobs to be druggies. It is kind of hard to sell millions of dollars worth of stuff when you are high and can't add.

[RobJohnson]

She's asking for a friend.

She also wants the recipe.