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50 Ways To Celebrate Michelle Obama's Birthday1. Shop at Target and don’t worry about hackers stealing your credit info. After all, it’s not as if you’re spending your own hard-earned money. 2. When escaping the bubble to go incognito among the masses, never dress to blend in. Always wear the most outrageous get-up that will make you stand out like a big red zit on prom night. And always warn media outlets in advance of what you’re doing so they’ll respect your privacy by staying away. 3. Go sleeveless, even when most of the country is freezing, because you can jack up your thermostat as high as you want. Or just stay in Hawaii a few extra weeks. 4. Tell other people to eat their vegetables. 5. Have your staff plant a garden, then make them tend it. Never do it yourself unless the cameras are rolling. 6. Wear $450 shoes with sparkly pink toe caps while appearing for a photo-op at a homeless shelter. 7. Travel to military installations where you’ll tie up traffic and shut down most facilities to make speeches about how you really care about military families. 8. Empathize with the military wife whose husband is deployed to a war zone by talking about tough you had it in your Chicago mansion with all those people to do things for you while your husband was in Springfield or Washington and only came home every weekend. 9. For the first time in your life, be proud of your country because they finally nominated a candidate based on his skin color instead his qualifications. 10. Tell someone else to give up their own piece of pie.
