Retired

[Dixie*Darling]

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. We really have no trouble in finding interesting things to do.  For example, the other day I went downtown to go to the newsstand for the Wall Street Journal, so I could track my investments. I was only in there for about 5 minutes.  When I came out, there was a cop writing a parking ticket.  I said to him, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break"?     
 
He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.  I called him a "Nazi."  He glared at me and wrote another ticket for worn tires.   
 
So I called him a "doughnut eating Gestapo."  He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
 
Then he wrote a third ticket.  This went on for about 20 minutes.  The more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't care....   
I came downtown on the bus.  The car he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said, "Hillary in '08." I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired.  It's important to my health.   

[Crazy Horse]

 

[Zeus]

Retirement is different for everyone...

One day, while going to the store, I passed by a nursing home. On the front lawn

Were six oldladieslying naked on the grass. I thought this wasa bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store.

On my return trip, I passed the same nursing home with the same six old ladies lying naked on the lawn. This time my curiosity got the best of me, and I went inside to talk to the Nursing Home Administrator.

"Do you know there are six ladies lying naked on your front lawn?"

"Yes," she said. "They're retired prostitutes, and they're having a Yard Sale."

[Dixie*Darling]

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