Congratulations to Stinky the Clown, #04-b Top DUmmie of 2012!
The sparkling old dude is a perennial favorite in the Top DUmmie contests; he was #05 Top DUmmie in 2011, #02 Top DUmmie in 2010, #05 Top DUmmie in 2009, #02 Top DUmmie in 2008, and #14 Top DUmmie in 2006.
Obviously a popular primitive, the sparkling old dude.
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The sparkling old dude is the one primitive about whom franksolich enjoys the most writing; it’s a sheer joy and pleasure to write about him.
franksolich’s tribute to the sparkling old dude:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,78626.0^^^if one reads only one linked article here, this is the one to read.
the sparkling old dude #05 Top DUmmie of 2011:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,68069.0.htmlthe sparkling old dude #02 Top DUmmie of 2010:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,53305.0.htmlthe sparkling old dude #05 Top DUmmie of 2009:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,38345.0.html(awards from 2008 and 2006 not available, but franksolich didn’t write them anyway)
I suspect the reason the sparkling old dude’s such a joy to write about is because he’s the only primitive franksolich’d care to meet in real life. You see, the sparkling old dude’s a
raconteur, a colorful teller of ribald and racy stories, and I’d like to hear them--about the juvenile delinquents on the rough streets of Bridgeport, Connecticut, about the guys in the Navy, about the various celebrities in the food-service industry, and about his business associates involved with the d’Alessandro crime family of Baltimore and San Francisco.
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Now, the sparkling old dude is one of the most prolific posters on Skins’s island, but there’s no point in quoting any of his political stuff, which is all nonsense anyway, and the same drivel over and over again.
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The sparkling old dude opened the year with a shout-out:
Stinky The Clown (49,020 posts) Sun Jan 1, 2012, 10:03 PM
All those elected officials you dislike? They are reflective of the people who voted for them
There are several hundred thousand Ron Pauls in his district.
There are a million or so Jeff Sessions in Alabama.
How many Michele Bachmanns are needed to elect a Michelle Bachmann?
Can you imagine what it must be like with all those Patrick McHenry's down there is East Carolina?
How mean must be the spirit among of the majority in Eric Cantor's district?
As bad as he is, Ben Nelson will be the last Democrat from Nebraska for a while. At least he doesn't live, devoid of human contact, in a cave like another Nebraskan.
Comforting, huh?
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,68188.0But alas the sparkling old dude shortly thereafter quit shouting out to those of us in the real world and gives the appearance of ignoring us…..but he really isn’t. He reads the DUmpster avidly, and there’s nothing wrong with that; we’re after all a public forum.
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The sparkling old dude is a rare author of bouncies--he writes them, but not many--perhaps because this one of his, from late 2008, is just too damned hard to top:
Husb2Sparkly (1000+ posts) Sat Dec-20-08 07:23 PM
Original message
So .... we went to the liquor store and a political rally broke out.
We were doing some last minute Christmas shopping. On the way home we stopped by Ballbusters to return some videos. Next to them is the liquor store where we get most of our wine. They're doing a wine tasting. Actually, they're doing two of them. One for ordinary wines and one for some really high end stuff. We stop at the cheap shit first. We sample. This nice woman, about our age, comes in. She starts tasting, too. "I just came in for some beer" she says. Her husband joins her. We sip the various $10 wines and discuss the merits of Old Rasputin Imperial Stout, which, it turns out, is his favorite brew and mine.
[picture of booze]
We finish with the cheap wines and follow the store owner to the second wine tasting, way in the back. This one has wines ranging up to $100 a bottle. We start with the (relative) low end of this stuff and work up.
One of the wines is a nice Veuve Cliquot.
[another picture of booze]
Which brought us to talking abut reasons to celebrate. I mention to Sparkly that it would be good for our planned day on January 20.
Which elicits a ":snap: We should do that too" from the lady who was now our wine drinking partner. Her husband, also our new wine drinking buddy, agrees.
The guy pouring the wine also agrees.
Pretty soon we learn he works for the DoD. He and all his coworkers are **thrilled** that a Democart won and most are quite happy with Obama.
She thinks Bush is a moron.
He thinks Bush screwed us up with his misdirection from Afghanistan t o Iraq.
The wine sales guy agrees.
Back to us, saying how much we think Bush is a national embarrassment.
More casual tasters sipped a glass or two and nodded approvingly or offered a comment.
This goes on for nearly an hour.
They bought the high end cabernet we had all tried and a very nice Zinfandel we suggested to them. We bought the bubbly and a really nice Claret we'd had at a party last week.
[yet another picture of booze]
We all shook hands and parted, happy, loopy, and feeling good about being Democrats.
It always amazes me how quickly people want to say they voted Democrat, yet, at the height of Moron's power after the coup, no one wanted to admit to being a Democart.
Well, many people didn't. I was never shy. But you know what I mean.
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,19762.0However, he did try this year:
Stinky The Clown (45,570 posts) Mon Mar 26, 2012, 03:10 PM
Are you seeing more than the ususal amount of people wearing hoodies?
I was out and about earlier today, which included a stop at the Mall. I was in a store, waiting to be helped. I engaged in conversation a woman who was just ahead of me in line. She was my age, maybe a few years younger (I am a geezer). She had on a hoodie. It was cool here today, so a hoodie was actually appropriate, but not pulled up inside the always-70-degree Mall.
We were in a store that sells (relatively) high value small items that are easy to steal, and commonly are. We talked about that for a bit. The conversation got around to the Trayvon Martin case ( I kinda steered it there, but not in too obvious a way.)
Yup, she was not a normal hoodie wearer. She was wearing hers with the hood up as a statement.
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,70937.0- - - - - - - - - -
The big event of the year for the sparkling old dude and his much-younger trophy wife was the massive electrical power-outage in June:
Stinky The Clown (46,576 posts) Sat Jun 30, 2012, 07:25 PM
A taste of third world living
We are among the one million power customers in the Mid Atlantic sweltering through a heat wave made worse by a power outage. Our temperatures were hovering at the three digit mark as the only sound apart from the birds were the drones of the few souls running their generators while not offering a few amps to anyone else.
The rest of us sit and swelter.
Traffic lights don't work. Drivers are either uncertain and crawling through intersections or dangerously speeding through as if it is their birthright.
The capriciousness of it all is amazing. The little 7-11 has power from the grid while the big supermarket next door is dark. A restaurant has his big billboard sized LED sign ablaze, telling all who pass that he is open (and hopin') for business. A man I know to be foreign born sits at the open door to his gas station's garage bay, sweating in the oppressive heat, with a sign saying his pumps don't work but he will tune your car up for half price, today only.
Freezers full of food are imperiled as we are reduced to cooking outdoors on coals or heating up our houses to blast furnace level as we are lighting stoves with matches.
The dry ice plants that we normally rely on at times like these to help keep our precious frozen food frozen are selling out their stocks, but have no power to make more.
My iPhone, rechargeable in the car, is the new millennium version of a transistor radio. The local all news radio station just announced that the driver called and said he'd just delivered a full truckload of ice to one of the local supermarkets.
I sit here in a bit of a hole between cell towers, writing this on my iPad, knowing I have to drive a bit to get it to connect . . . . . or wait a looooong time for it to go through.
We went to five gas stations earlier today and never did get any gas. Four had no power and the fifth had no gas. Good thing Sparkly's new car gets good mileage. That quarter tank ought to last a while, even as we go driving just to cool off and charge our electrical gadgets.
There's no looting . . . . . so far. I am sure, given the unbearable heat and the extreme boredom, that will happen, too.
People always pull together at times like these.
Until they don't.
I think the looting point is a few days away right now. But it will come. It always does in third world countries.
How'd you like to be the guy in the power company truck, driving through and assessing damage, but not stopping to fix things yet? You think he'll be popular as he drives through, with no answers for you?
So here we sit, a day's buggy ride from the nation's Capitol, with no power, low fuel, high heat, and reduced to cooking on fires, not for fun, but of necessity.
And no one can tell us when it might end.
A million power customers, probably four million people, sitting outside, in the unrelenting heat, just trying to get by.
In what seems just like a third world country.
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,74926.0One could easily imagine the domestic scene in the sparkling home during this crisis; the sparkling old dude folding paper so as to make disposable fans to desperately wave against the sweating face of his bad-tempered spoiled-brat trophy wife in a vain attempt to keep her cool, because if he doesn’t, she won’t love the old man any more.
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The sparkling old dude’s coddled-and-spoiled trophy wife may some day leave the old guy for someone younger and more aesthetic--at least with hair on top of his head--but he has the assurance of knowing that most members of the DUmpster will always love him, through thick and thin, good and bad.
