Greetings to all on this, the eve of one of the two most sacred holidays of mankind, and that day in which we begin the countdown to the
Top Ten DUmmies of 2011, culminating one week hence with announcement of the main award,
Top DUmmie of 2011.
Turnout in voting this year set a new record, although unlike last year, there were hardly any close races. One might recall that last year, Top DUmmies 03-08 were each separated by a single vote, and the only runaways were for Top DUmmie 02 and the Top DUmmie of 2010.
The 02 Top DUmmie and the Top DUmmie of 2010 had set records, but just as the landslide presidential election of 1980, one of the largest landslides in history, was subsequently overshadowed by the even larger landslide of 1984, well, the
generalissimo dude and the
Die alte Sau have bit the dust this year, holding such records no longer.
But first, the runners-up to the
Top Ten DUmmies of 2011.
20-
cbayer (new)
--a long-time moderator on the old Skins’s island, notorious for dousing campfires almost as soon as they’re lit; one’s sure that many shout-outs to the DUmpster here evaporate even before one sees them.
19-
The Straight Story (04 in 2008)
--the king of sob stories on Skins’s island; never wins, always loses, in life.
18-
Mineral Man (19 in 2010)
--quite possibly the
eminence grise of Skins’s island, although superficially underrated in his informal power and influence; the wise calm serene elder sage, the John-Lennon-in-old-age lookalike.
17-
William Pitt (02 in 2005; Top DUmmie in 2006; 06 in 2007; 20 in 2008; Willie in 2010)
--yawn.
16-
Skinner, EarlG & Elad (Skinner 15 in 2005)
--the Big Three who run Skins’s island.
15-
kpete (14 in 2007; 14 in 2008)
--the copy-and-paste queen of Skins’s island, who does so from her Streisandian digs in a gated neighborhood in San Diego; as with many other primitives, part of the 1%.
14-
kentuck (12 in 2005; 13 in 2010)
--a strong contender for 02 or 03 or 04 Top DUmmie this year, but blandly and colorlessly faded in the last quarter.
13-
Sub Atomic (new)
--an obnoxious professional queer whose time on Skins’s island was short, alas.
12-
Proud2BlibKansan (03 in 2008; 19 in 2009; Top DUmmie in 2010)
--destined to be a constant presence in Top DUmmie every year, until she self-immolates in a fiery passion and orgasm of Hate and rage.
11-
NNN0LHI (new)
--grouchy old Don, his income and property being voraciously consumed by a corrupt political machine which he figured would take care of him, if he took care of it; he diligently took care of it for thirty years, and alas has yet to figure out it’s not going to take care of him.
Congratulations to the runners-up, which is no small feat, but one hopes at least some of them make it into the top tier for 2012.
next up: on Christmas Day, the four special awards
