Daughter finds conservative men and beliefs attractive, MJkcj heartbroken

[Vagabond]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021304176

Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:38 PM
MJkcj (182 posts)

my heart is breaking. my daughter is turning into a republican
I was raised by a feminist and am a proud liberal. I have a low tolerance for republicans who buy into the right wing hypocritical bullshit.

I have three beautiful intelligent daughters. One of them is living with a republican. I just saw her post something on facebook that made me realize I'm losing her.

my heart is breaking. anyone else go through this. how do you deal?

IOW, your daughter actually met a man that knows how to treat women and she realized her mom and grandma are mostly just man hating shrews.

Thrill (16,498 posts)
1. Sad

Knew it must have something to do with the guy she's with

Yeah, something about opening the door for her and paying for the date.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:43 PM
benld74 (3,703 posts)
2. Heck I make jokes in the house to my daughters,,,I tell them

Marry a rich republican, don't do what mom did.

THen take him to the proverbial cleaners!!!!

I figure, holidays will be V-E-R-Y intersting to say the least,,,

Wow, just wow.  Men are to be used for the money.  Good job raising strong independent daughters.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:43 PM
 Angry Dragon (18,809 posts)
4. intervention and have her partner arrested for abuse

other than that, I got nothing 




Sit down with her and have her tell you all the facts that have caused her to change
and then go on-line together to check the facts

Yeah, 'cause she wants to be as miserable as ma is, really.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:43 PM
 SheilaT (10,533 posts)
5. How much are you in contact with her these days?

I know that it is terribly common for women to alter their views and thinking to be more in line with the men in their lives (which makes me wonder what it's like for same-sex couples, but that's a different conversation).

Is she open to reason? Can you get her to understand that she really is not part of the 1% -- at least I'm guessing that she's not. Can you show her that the current Republican thinking is absolutely opposed to her human-ness?

I feel for you, even though my two adult sons have stayed true to the liberal/progressive/Democrats that their parents are.

1%, why do you have to be the 1% to want the government to leave you alone to try and succeed?

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:43 PM
Skittles (80,980 posts)
6. FIGHT, MJkcj!!!!

she's hearing too much from one side - straighten her out!!!!!!! ARM HER WITH THE FACTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, Yes! Pound the table!  Oh, wait, that is what you do when you don't have facts.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:45 PM
 handmade34 (8,767 posts)
9. it will be ok

I too have a daughter who tends to date Republicans and is often taken in... I just keep talking to her and I know she hears... keep the lines of communication open with your daughter; you will not lose her forever   

IOW, you are more than happy to sabotage your daughters relationships until you get a son-in-law that mooches off of her and doesn't like to work.  Then you will be happy.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:45 PM
 gateley (58,419 posts)
10. ...

 

I've lost a few friends who were influenced by the man in their lives, and I'm a little concerned about my niece. I don't know what you can do to change their minds except don't discuss politics. And maybe not read their Facebook page? It's so painful to see someone you love become something you hate. 

Hate?  You idiots hate everything.  You hate each other.  There is no becoming something you hate, you hate them already.  It may be only because you hate your neice because of her youth, none the less...

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:55 PM
 Zorra (16,656 posts)
17. OMG, I'm so sorry - what a nightmare! I'd be crushed, too.

I actually told my boys that if they ever became republicans it would totally break my heart, and I would consider myself a failure as a parent.

Anyway, look at the bright side - the guy is a republican, so he must be a total schmuck. Hopefully they'll break up soon, the spell will be broken, and she'll come back to sanity.

Now boys, you must never ever think for yourselves or you will break mommies heart.  In fact I think it would be better if you just stayed in the basement with videogames, porn ,and cheetoes.

30. She wants the top rate of tax to be 3.6% below where you want it to be?

She's not comfortable with the Individual Mandate for health insurance?

Her views on gay marriage are the the same as what Obama's views were a few weeks ago prior to him evolving on the issue?

I think love should conquer pretty much most of these differences of opinion. If it bothers you that much, just don't talk about politics. 

A voice of sanity.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 10:41 PM
appleannie1 (2,189 posts)
33. We rarely see one of our daughters and her ultra Christian neocon husband. It keeps peace in the

Last edited Sat Sep 8, 2012, 10:42 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

family. He isn't even from this country yet knows all about what our forefather's wishes were. You just have to figure out a way to work with it and not let it totally tear the family apart. 

That's because unlike you, he had to learn about our founding fathers and documents in enough detail to pass an exam for his citizenship.  He couldn't just smoke pot and sleep through civics in high school.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 10:42 PM
DrewFlorida (229 posts)
34. I post replies to all republican lies I see on FaceBook, as a way to educate my adult sons!

By refuting all of the right-wing misinformation, my two adult sons have an opportunity to see the flip side of the important issues and therefore those lies left unanswered don't become known as facts. My sons read everything I post although they are not always pleased that I post so much politics on FaceBook, I consider it collateral damage, I would rather have them annoyed with me than ignorant of the facts of life!

And your adult sons laugh at your posts and go on with their day.

35. Yes, I have a son who's starting a new business and has been feeling the ReThugs

can be better for his business. He announced 2 weeks ago he'll be voting ReThug. However after the Dem convention...I think he's reconsidered. I do hope and pray he'll vote Democratic. He's always been a Dem but his help are all those stupid to white men and he gets to listen to a fair share of Obama bashing. I can't believe they vote against their own interests. He watches Matthews and he's helped to prevent him from really going off the deep end. I'm going to throw him all the life lines I can muster. What I really need is some talking points on how Obama will be good for really small business. Sorry can't type now...watching the end of Saving Private Ryan.

So you're going to rant at your adult son for the next eight weeks.  I bet he quits answering your phone calls.

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 10:48 PM
ann--- (156 posts)
38. I know how you feel

One of my sons who was a staunch "no party affiliation" kind of guy is buying into his wife's politics. Very sad. I love him so much but refuse to talk about the election - or any political issue - with him and his wife.

I'm not registered to any party but I have never, ever voted for a Republican in a presidential or Congressional race and I NEVER WILL.

So you're son found a woman that opens the door for and pays for the dates?  Or is it that he likes that he doesn't have to worry what disease he is going to catch hanging around her?

42. my sister's boyfriend is turning her into one too

Last edited Sat Sep 8, 2012, 10:58 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

She was a liberal democrat but he is a conservative republican and has influenced her so much that she now posts republican talking points on facebook and so on. So I'm familiar with the situation, it is just something you have to deal with, and I don't let politics get in the way of family relationships.

Another for conservative men.  Ya'll should be wondering what it is that they have that liberal men are lacking.


It goes on and on with quite a few low post count posters building cred.  I don't just wonder how they get along with family, I wonder how they get along with anybody.

[lastparker]

Oh FFS.  My Mother is a liberal loonbag, and when the political discussions start getting dicey, I quit talking politics with her.  I can't imagine refusing to speak to my Mother because of political differences....or stalking her internet postings...  What the hell is WRONG with these people?

[Vagabond]

Oh FFS.  My Mother is a liberal loonbag, and when the political discussions start getting dicey, I quit talking politics with her.  I can't imagine refusing to speak to my Mother because of political differences....or stalking her internet postings...  What the hell is WRONG with these people?

They are as bad at parenting as they are anything else.  Despite having idiots for parents, some of their children grow up and learn from their experiences and relationships and wind up somewhere not as rigidly leftist as their moonbat parents.  ON DU, all relationships are subjected to politics, therefore they feel the need to "reach out" to their wayward independent chidren.

Edited due to the fact that I seemed to be inventing a new word.

[JohnnyReb]

Who knew that liberal women wore aprons and kept their kids tied to it.

[Rachel]

Well, there is a lot of appeal in conservative men. Most liberal women can't understand this till they think with an open mind, then again open minded and liberal are somewhat of an oxymoron!

[Rebel]

Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:38 PM
MJkcj (182 posts)

my heart is breaking. my daughter is turning into a republican
I was raised by a feminist and am a proud liberal. I have a low tolerance for republicans who buy into the right wing hypocritical bullshit.

I have three beautiful intelligent daughters. One of them is living with a republican. I just saw her post something on facebook that made me realize I'm losing her.

my heart is breaking. anyone else go through this. how do you deal?

Well, you said she was intelligent. What did you expect?

[mamacags]

Although I have a feeling my daughter is going to turn out to be a patchouli wearing hippy liberal some day, I laugh at this idiot in the here and now.

[jukin]

It has been my experience that when a leftist mother talks bad about her daughter's boyfriend/husband for being a republican, said mother does not hear from her daughter very often nor make many visits to her. 

[JohnnyReb]

My sons girlfriend comes from a VERY liberal family. Girlfriend says she wants to adopt me and the wife. Girlfriend says, "He's the best boyfriend evah."

So far as I see it, it's just high school puppy-love but I can see her someday marrying a conservative guy.

[USA4ME]

Kath1

61. Just hope for the best!

My conversion from go-along Republican wife to 100% progressive Democrat started with the Iraq war, which I totally hated. Went to the March For Women's Lives at the time, which really inspired me to go ahead and get divorced... be myself. Just hope she never marries this guy. Divorce is messy and expensive!

If you ever needed the definition of a kook...

At least the ex doesn't have to live with the nut anymore.

.

[delilahmused]

Good freaking Lord, mothers of policemen worry everyday whether this is the day their sons and daughters have a run in with a psycho, mothers of firefighters worry that their children will get caught in a fire, 100's of us military mom's have son's & daughters deploying and these whiny bitches are upset because their family members, AFTER LIVING IN A LIBERAL HOUSEHOLD THE FIRST 18 YEARS OF THEIR LIVES, have a different political philosophy than them? And that makes them "lost"? So their sons and daughters have no redeeming qualities beyond their POV about politics?

Other people, including children of liberals, can't be swayed, coerced or brainwashed into buying into a different view. They already know the values of the left. As they talk to people of other points of view, they probably do the usual back and forth and then come to the conclusion that other people have a stronger argument and stronger proof that they're on the right side.

Family members aren't going to be monolithic thinkers. My oldest son was caught up in the 0bama hype and registered to vote for the first time in his life. I didn't chastise him. I did tell him I was proud of him for voting. Despite growing up in a conservative family with conservative values and political philosophy he's pretty liberal. But, he's a great father & husband, can fix absolutely anything from dishwashers to heavy equipment (he practiced on my appliances growing up) and is highly intelligent and very well read. It's not my business to get all maudlin and worry about him not thinking like the rest of us, he grew up knowing what we believe.

Cindie

[Celtic Rose]

Although I have a feeling my daughter is going to turn out to be a patchouli wearing hippy liberal some day, I laugh at this idiot in the here and now.

My dad teases me about Romney not having a chance in November all the time, but I know that he loves me and he is really happy about what I am doing with my life.  My grandmother tells my aunt that she has to vote Republican to cancel out my dad's vote.  My family spreads across the political spectrum, but we all love and respect each other.

Neither of my parents would ever even consider the politics of a guy that I was dating, their concern is whether or not he treats me well (and my mom wants to know if we could have red haired grandchildren for her)

[BattleHymn]

It has been my experience that when a leftist mother talks bad about her daughter's boyfriend/husband for being a republican, said mother does not hear from her daughter very often nor make many visits to her. 

My spouse is living proof of this.  H5.

[SSG Snuggle Bunny]

Contraast this tripe to all the soul-wrenching appeals about how we simply MUST have "marriage equality" because love must be unfettered from the scornful eye of judgmental bigots.

[NHSparky]

It has been my experience that when a leftist mother talks bad about her daughter's boyfriend/husband for being a republican, said mother does not hear from her daughter very often nor make many visits to her. 

Speaking of which, has Pam talked to her daughter lately?

[ADsOutburst]

What is wrong with these people that they see themselves as failures if their children turn out to have a mind of their own?

[Chris_]

What is wrong with these people that they see themselves as failures if their children turn out to have a mind of their own?

These are the same people that pat themselves on the back and praise themselves for being "open minded" and "tolerant of other views".

Hilarious.

[BEG]

Response to MJkcj (Original post)
Sat Sep 8, 2012, 09:55 PM
 Zorra (16,656 posts)
17. OMG, I'm so sorry - what a nightmare! I'd be crushed, too.

I actually told my boys that if they ever became republicans it would totally break my heart, and I would consider myself a failure as a parent.

Anyway, look at the bright side - the guy is a republican, so he must be a total schmuck. Hopefully they'll break up soon, the spell will be broken, and she'll come back to sanity.

You already are a failure as a parent if you really said that to your children.

[Chris_]

I have some family friends who are devout Christians.  They have three gay sons and a daughter.  They love them all equally and don't ask what their politics are. 

You DUmmies are scum.

[SSG Snuggle Bunny]

Did Nuclear Unicorn get TSed for dating outside her faith?

[Rebel]

I have some family friends who are devout Christians.  They have three gay sons and a daughter.  They love them all equally and don't ask what their politics are. 

You DUmmies are scum.

All 3 sons turned out gay? Damn man. What are the chances of that happening?

[Chris_]

I don't know but they all look the same too, despite being five years apart.

They're nice guys.  I helped them install a new TV but that was the only time I met them.  I've never met the daughter.  Their father retired from IBM years ago.

[BattleHymn]

What is wrong with these people that they see themselves as failures if their children turn out to have a mind of their own?

In my spouses case, and I'll bet in most other cases, it is the exact opposite. 

Spousal unit's mother questions about what is wrong with her, why did she change, and why is she so different from the rest of her family . 

[Chris_]

You have liberal in-laws?  Poor guy.

My mother is the most liberal person in the family.  My sister comes in second... the rest of us are in the back of the pack.

[Rebel]

Btw, seen the female moonbats and, as a man, I'd have to say I'd be swayed to become a conservative as well.