I was thinking recently that it would be great if someone were to come out with a movie about DU. Then I wondered what the trailer would be like. It figured it may be something like this.
Picture a completely black screen. Music starts to softly play. Maybe "Adagio for Strings" from Platoon.
Then an unseen narrator with a deep voice begins speaking...
They said that you couldn't combine stupid, hatred, and hypocrisy to successfully create laughs. They were wrong.
On January 20, 2001…stupid got a new name, hated soared to new levels, and hypocrisy was taken to the extreme.
On that day…democrat underground was born and the sane world hasn't stopped laughing since.
Over ten years in the making…
Starring a cast of thousands….
Coming this November to a theater near you.
It is….
DU: the movie. As the narrator says these words the blank, black screen is filled with a large "DU: the movie" in democrat blue. As the title fades to black the narrator begins speaking again.
See the woman who claims to have done everything…except be modest.
See the man who pretends to be a Green Beret Force Recon SEAL songwriter.
See the woman who created the modern age fairy tale.
Learn how to perform detailed scientific experiments with precision equipment such as concrete blocks and wire.
Learn how to hate and denigrate America while reaping her benefits.
Learn how stupid rethuglicans constantly foil the smartest people on the innerwebz.
Watch the blink, blink, blink, blink.
And much, much more.
It's political spin, in-depth racism, and rampant insanity like you've never seen it before.
Starring:
nadin "intrepid reporter"
Stinky the "laughing stock" Clown
Tomin "way too deep" Tib
Spooked "no, really, he's spooked" 911
and many, many more
At this point the screen is still very dark, but by the contrast you can see that there is something there. You can also tell that the camera is ever so slowly pulling back. The narrator continues.
With special guest appearance by franksolich as…the genius mastermind.
And featuring Karl Rove as...the ruler of the world.
The screen is more of a dark brown now. The camera is still pulling back. The narrator continues.
This November the new catch phrase will be: Do you DU?
Don't be left out. Be sure to see…DU: the movie.
When this is spoken the camera pulls back quickly and just enough to see that it had been closely focused on the back of a cockroach. The roach now fills the screen with the words "DU: the movie" superimposed on the cockroach.
The narrator is silence as a light shines on the cockroach and beneath the words "DU: the movie" appears the words "shine the light on the cockroaches".
As the roach scurries from the light the narrator speaks once more:
This film has not yet been rated.