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Author Topic: No Wonder Men are Happier  (Read 3042 times)

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Offline Rebel

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No Wonder Men are Happier
« on: January 03, 2008, 01:45:03 PM »
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
Creatures?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station rest-room because this one is just to “icky”.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000.
Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a six-pack, if you wear any at all.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline RightCoast

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #1 on: January 03, 2008, 06:51:55 PM »
Quote from: Rebel on January 03, 2008, 01:45:03 PM
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
Creatures?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station rest-room because this one is just to “icky”.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000.
Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a six-pack, if you wear any at all.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.  (for under $100.00)

No wonder men are happier.


Fixt.
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Offline Splashdown

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #2 on: January 03, 2008, 06:55:59 PM »
Quote
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.  (for under $100.00) (at a local gas station/drugstore/convenience store)


fixt fixt  :-)
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Let nothing frighten you. 
All things are passing;
God never changes.
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God alone suffices.
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Offline RightCoast

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #3 on: January 03, 2008, 07:26:25 PM »
Quote from: Splshdown on January 03, 2008, 06:55:59 PM
Quote
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.  (for under $100.00) (at a local gas station/drugstore/convenience store)


fixt fixt  :-)
:agree:
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nine eleven is a car
nine one one is an emergency service
September 11, 2001 was an attack
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Offline Rebel

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #4 on: January 03, 2008, 07:28:18 PM »
True dat, you can buy gift cards from those racks.  :-)
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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline Hawkgirl

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #5 on: January 03, 2008, 07:29:25 PM »
 :2muchgay:





 :runs:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #6 on: January 03, 2008, 07:34:35 PM »
A lot of them are true, some are feminists BS, but this one got my attention:
Quote
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
This is SOOO true. I have had the same hairstyle for 30 years.
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Offline Rebel

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #7 on: January 03, 2008, 07:35:24 PM »
Quote from: freedumb2003 on January 03, 2008, 07:34:35 PM
A lot of them are true, some are feminists BS, but this one got my attention:
Quote
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
This is SOOO true. I have had the same hairstyle for 30 years.


What, bald?  :-)
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NAMBLA is a left-wing organization.

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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #8 on: January 03, 2008, 07:35:40 PM »
Quote from: Splshdown on January 03, 2008, 06:55:59 PM
Quote
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.  (for under $100.00) (at a local gas station/drugstore/convenience store)


fixt fixt  :-)

Why is it that the best romantic Get Out Of Trouble Free cards are at the Car Wash? 
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Offline RightCoast

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #9 on: January 03, 2008, 07:36:12 PM »
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:29:25 PM
:2muchgay:





 :runs:

WAIT!  I know how to cure gayness now!   :2ndbase: :asssmack: :leghump:
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nine eleven is a car
nine one one is an emergency service
September 11, 2001 was an attack
Never Forget, or Minimize.

Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #10 on: January 03, 2008, 07:37:04 PM »
Quote from: Rebel on January 03, 2008, 07:35:24 PM
Quote from: freedumb2003 on January 03, 2008, 07:34:35 PM
A lot of them are true, some are feminists BS, but this one got my attention:
Quote
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
This is SOOO true. I have had the same hairstyle for 30 years.


What, bald?  :-)

LOL -- amazingly, no.  Just pretty short and brushed straight back with no part.

In my family we gray early (my brother was all gray by 18, me by 35) -- but we all were blessed with great hairlines.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #11 on: January 03, 2008, 07:37:43 PM »
Quote from: RightCoast on January 03, 2008, 07:36:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:29:25 PM
:2muchgay:





 :runs:

WAIT!  I know how to cure gayness now!   :2ndbase: :asssmack: :leghump:

A good start would be not posting smilies.
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Offline Hawkgirl

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #12 on: January 03, 2008, 07:44:46 PM »
Quote from: freedumb2003 on January 03, 2008, 07:34:35 PM
A lot of them are true, some are feminists BS, but this one got my attention:
Quote
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
This is SOOO true. I have had the same hairstyle for 30 years.

:picsneeded:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #13 on: January 03, 2008, 07:50:47 PM »
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:44:46 PM
Quote from: freedumb2003 on January 03, 2008, 07:34:35 PM
A lot of them are true, some are feminists BS, but this one got my attention:
Quote
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
This is SOOO true. I have had the same hairstyle for 30 years.

:picsneeded:

This is the closest to mine I could find -- I just have gray hair with dark underpinnings and keep it a little neater.  And dark eyes.  And no 90's 5 o'clock shadow. And older.  And glasses.  And a little different facial features. And straight.  But other than that, this is a dead ringer

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Offline Hawkgirl

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #14 on: January 03, 2008, 07:53:12 PM »
All I see is a little red X :clueless:
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Offline Rebel

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #15 on: January 03, 2008, 08:00:24 PM »
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:53:12 PM
All I see is a little red X :clueless:

Damn, and I had two smilies for that particular purpose that I didn't upload.
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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline RightCoast

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #16 on: January 03, 2008, 08:01:46 PM »
Quote from: freedumb2003 on January 03, 2008, 07:37:43 PM
Quote from: RightCoast on January 03, 2008, 07:36:12 PM
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:29:25 PM
:2muchgay:





 :runs:

WAIT!  I know how to cure gayness now!   :2ndbase: :asssmack: :leghump:

A good start would be not posting smilies.

:confused: :bird: :whatever: :hammer: :chill: :lame: :offtopic: :ranton: :gay:



I'll try.   :-).
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nine eleven is a car
nine one one is an emergency service
September 11, 2001 was an attack
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Offline Rebel

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #17 on: January 03, 2008, 08:03:47 PM »
Quote from: Hawkgirl on January 03, 2008, 07:53:12 PM
All I see is a little red X :clueless:

BTW, it's that white dude from Fast and Furious 2.

Here are the smilies:


 :bumpx:              :redx:             :xpoke:
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NAMBLA is a left-wing organization.

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There's a reason why patriotism is considered a conservative value. Watch a Tea Party rally and you'll see people proudly raising the American flag and showing pride in U.S. heroes such as Thomas Jefferson. Watch an OWS rally and you'll see people burning the American flag while showing pride in communist heroes such as Che Guevera. --Bob, from some news site

Offline LadyLiberty

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #18 on: January 03, 2008, 08:06:07 PM »
I'd be happy if I had one of me, too  :rotf:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: No Wonder Men are Happier
« Reply #19 on: February 16, 2011, 05:29:14 PM »
 :cheersmate: :cheersmate:
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