DUmmy catches husband watching porn, or catches self

[BannedFromDU]

Star Member cyclonefence (3,810 posts)

The most bizarre thing

happened last night while I was posting to DU. Our TV turned itself on--my husband had gone to bed 20 minutes earlier, and the cat was with him--and what was on was totally hard-core porn. I mean, everything. In the corner of the screen it said "for coyotes only" or it might have been "cougars" but these ladies were too young to be cougars.

I ran upstairs to tell my husband, and he said "just turn it off" and went back to sleep.

I tried to check the screen that tells you what channel you're watching, but that screen wouldn't come up--just more ****ing and sucking. I tried pushing the "record" button but that didn't work, either.

We don't subscribe to any porn channels (that I know of!), and besides, if we did, it would show on the menu screen, right?

A wonderful Christmas present, I guess.

So you guys watch porn...who cares?

The plot thickens:

Star Member cyclonefence (3,810 posts)
7. It was streamed or something from my husband's phone

and I asked him how much it costs (it's premium stuff, believe me), and he said it was free! Damn. Back in the days when I was interested in porn, the actresses always kept their brassieres on. But then, I'm old as dirt.

God bless him, I say. Keeps him off my back. As it were.

     Maybe if you serviced your husband instead of DUmmies on the internet, he wouldn't be secretly spanking it to weird porn.

[landofconfusion80]

So you guys watch porn...who cares?

The plot thickens:


     Maybe if you serviced your husband instead of DUmmies on the internet, he wouldn't be secretly spanking it to weird porn.

Kind of sounds like the primitive is a prude that has zero interest in satisfying its husband's physical needs. Selfish and greedy true to form

[Ralph Wiggum]

Without even bothering to click the DUmp link, I can already ascertain that this story is as full of holes as Cyclone Fence's granny panties. So much suspicious and ambiguous phrasing.

[Old n Grumpy]

4. What channel is it?

Do I gotta pay for it?
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Response to 3Hotdogs (Reply #4)Wed Dec 28, 2022, 09:02 AM
Tetrachloride (4,738 posts)
5. The English Channel

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[Old n Grumpy]

I wonder how she knew it was premium stuff? Maybe the guy wasn’t wearing black socks and a mask Lowell

[CollectivismMustDie]

"cyclonefence"

Someones got herself a big brown beaver.

I would be unsurprised if the primitives name in RL was Wynona.

(Primus reference, for those who may not get the reference)

[RuralNc]

cyclonefence (3,814 posts)

7.  ....Back in the days when I was interested in porn, the actresses always kept their brassieres on...

How kind of you to call them "actresses". And.... nevermind.

[landofconfusion80]

"cyclonefence"

Someones got herself a big brown beaver.

I would be unsurprised if the primitives name in RL was Wynona.

(Primus reference, for those who may not get the reference)

Somehow  I missed that whole thing when it first came out. The joy I had sharing it with my teenager later in life was limitless however

[CollectivismMustDie]

Somehow  I missed that whole thing when it first came out. The joy I had sharing it with my teenager later in life was limitless however

The video is even pretty funny, though a little strange:

https://youtu.be/aYDfwUJzYQg

[DUmpsterDiver]

This DUnce tale has more holes in it than it has ever shared with its partner.   ICP indeed

[landofconfusion80]

The video is even pretty funny, though a little strange:

https://youtu.be/aYDfwUJzYQg

The mr.crinkle one is even weirder