Wed Sep 11, 2013, 09:42 PMhttp://www.democraticunderground.com/1018478216
Locut0s (4,108 posts)
Sorry for worrying everyone with my recent cryptic posts. Having major issues...
I've been having little breakdowns over these past few days. I've had major ones and minor ones in the past, these are pretty major though I have felt slightly worse. As many know I have a LONG history of anxiety, depression and the like.
The progress I made over the summer was significant so I thought perhaps I had most of my issues beat but I neglected to realize that I'd really never even touched my real issues, the perfectionism, self hate, and the like. Moving into the dorms here was really rather uneventful for me which was good as I was worried I'd have difficulties with the socializing aspects etc, this shows I'm better there than I thought. BUT I also thought that it would help solve my anxieties surrounding school which it did nothing for at all really.
As the days have gone by I've found myself getting more and more overwhelmed. Assignments cause me to panic. Blah, blah, blah.......
I was bad enough that last couple of days I would hide in the washrooms between class and cry uncontrollably due to the stress. Blah, blah, blah.....
But of course this shouldn't make me freak out as much as I do, the bigger reason for that is my life long habit of absolute perfectionism and taking everything on mentally all at once instead of working on things one step at a time (something I've never managed to learn to do). Logically it makes no sense to be stressed out to the point of tears and semi suicidal thoughts (not something I'd act on) but there you have it that's how my brain works. Blah, blah, whine and blah......
Today I saw my program head and managed to get my course load reduced by 2 courses this term. That MAY help a bit but I'm far from optimistic about it. One thing this university emphasizes above all else is SHIT loads of work, they cram 3-4 years of work at other institutions into 2 years here.....
But it's not really the place for someone like me, but now that I'm a year in it's difficult to switch, credits here don't transfer easily
Yet I don't exactly feel s trong enough to get through this crisis either. I'm exhausted by the effort of just trying to hold myself together.
credits here don't transfer easily
I have a LONG history of anxiety, depression and the like.
Wed Sep 11, 2013, 09:42 PM
Locut0s (4,108 posts)
Sorry for worrying everyone with my recent cryptic posts. Having major issues...
I've been having little breakdowns over these past few days. I've had major ones and minor ones in the past, these are pretty major though I have felt slightly worse. As many know I have a LONG history of anxiety, depression and the like.
The progress I made over the summer was significant so I thought perhaps I had most of my issues beat but I neglected to realize that I'd really never even touched my real issues, the perfectionism, self hate, and the like. Moving into the dorms here was really rather uneventful for me which was good as I was worried I'd have difficulties with the socializing aspects etc, this shows I'm better there than I thought. BUT I also thought that it would help solve my anxieties surrounding school which it did nothing for at all really.
As the days have gone by I've found myself getting more and more overwhelmed. Assignments cause me to panic. Blah, blah, blah.......
I was bad enough that last couple of days I would hide in the washrooms between class and cry uncontrollably due to the stress. Blah, blah, blah.....
But of course this shouldn't make me freak out as much as I do, the bigger reason for that is my life long habit of absolute perfectionism and taking everything on mentally all at once instead of working on things one step at a time (something I've never managed to learn to do). Logically it makes no sense to be stressed out to the point of tears and semi suicidal thoughts (not something I'd act on) but there you have it that's how my brain works. Blah, blah, whine and blah......
Today I saw my program head and managed to get my course load reduced by 2 courses this term. That MAY help a bit but I'm far from optimistic about it. One thing this university emphasizes above all else is SHIT loads of work, they cram 3-4 years of work at other institutions into 2 years here.....
But it's not really the place for someone like me, but now that I'm a year in it's difficult to switch, credits here don't transfer easily
Yet I don't exactly feel s trong enough to get through this crisis either. I'm exhausted by the effort of just trying to hold myself together.
Attention: Will R. Lee Ermy, the shrink, pick up the red courtesy phone please. Will R. Lee Ermy, the shrink, pick up the red courtesy phone please.
Locut0s (4,108 posts)
...I was bad enough that last couple of days I would hide in the washrooms between class and cry uncontrollably due to the stress. Blah, blah, blah.....
Aww hell Perky, we're both thinking on the same wavelength tonight. :rotf: :cheersmate:
Today I saw my program head and managed to get my course load reduced by 2 courses this term.
I'm guessing gym class was one of them:
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQZnEPRYyUU[/youtube]
Locut0s (4,108 posts)I don't think I'd said that.
...I was bad enough that last couple of days I would hide in the washrooms between class and cry uncontrollably due to the stress.
Locut0s
Logically it makes no sense to be stressed out to the point of tears and semi suicidal thoughts (not something I'd act on)...
It seems liberals, at least on a subconscious level, know what they need to do, but for whatever stupid reason they won't follow through. This lack of full commitment by the left is placing an undue burden upon decent and civilized people, and for this these cretins deserve our scorn.
.
I don't think I'd said that.
This is what happens when you avoid manual labor your whole life.
It seems liberals, at least on a subconscious level, know what they need to do, but for whatever stupid reason they won't follow through.
.
I didn't know the character of Leonard Lawrence was based off of a real person.
Inside the LocoNuts dorm room:
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0y0gmJVb71qgb2cao1_500.gif)
Locut0s (4,108 posts)
...I was bad enough that last couple of days I would hide in the washrooms between class and cry uncontrollably due to the stress.
I don't think I'd said that.
This is what happens when you avoid manual labor your whole life.
I don't think I'd said that.
This is what happens when you avoid manual labor your whole life.
This Cat is seriously CooCoo for CoCoPuffs. Maybe he needs to link up with Lady Freedom.
This man's parents did him no favors.
This morning on F&F, they were talking about people as old as 30, were taking their parents on their job interviews. :whatever:Oh good Lord... :thatsright:
Oh good Lord... :thatsright:
Did they happen to mention where that occurs? I have never see anyone drag their parents to a job interview.
Oh good Lord... :thatsright:
Did they happen to mention where that occurs? I have never see anyone drag their parents to a job interview.
I had a guy show up for an interview with his wife. The position was for Sr Electronics Engineer.
No he did not get the job. :rofl:
Grandma may have been a Teacher or Liberian for 40 years but the things she made, rugs, quilts, afghans become precious to us
DUmmy LocoNuts Checks In
« on: September 11, 2013, 09:04:08 pm »
Sun Sep 15, 2013, 06:11 PMDon't quit, LocoNuts! That's all part of the fun of college life!
Locut0s (4,138 posts)
71. I think i have to quit...
I'm becoming self destructive. Drinking, taking pills in response to the anxiety.
Response to Locut0s (Reply #71)
Mon Sep 16, 2013, 11:53 AM
elleng (42,295 posts)
73. Darn, hate to hear this but
IMO you must see a psychiatrist, often, as I've suggested before, every day, or 5 days/week or somesuch, because whatever they've been doing for you clearly isn't working. And/or find a different doc?
Response to Locut0s (Reply #71)Don't listen to DUmmy Tobin S.!
Mon Sep 16, 2013, 04:37 PM
Tobin S. (5,902 posts)
74. Well, for ****'s sake, don't kill yourself.
Response to Locut0s (Original post)Yeah, LocoNuts, you can get a lot of good advice from stevenumbers.
Tue Sep 17, 2013, 08:57 PM
steve2470 (16,414 posts)
75. status update please, if you don't mind ? PM me otherwise please
Sun Sep 15, 2013, 06:11 PMIt's nice to see so many primitives jockeying for a position in the Top DUmmies this year!
Locut0s (4,138 posts)
71. I think i have to quit...
I'm becoming self destructive. Drinking, taking pills in response to the anxiety.
Lady Freedom Returns (6,000 posts) Fri Sep 13, 2013, 02:06 AM
44. Hang in there!
I have been there done that, so I can relate.
You said you have a therapist meet soon, right? Make sure to tell him EVERYTHING!
Jus talking one on one can work in ways meds can't.
Has the LocoNuts primitive ever considered living the homeless life in Tucson?
Locut0s (4,140 posts)Some animals in the wild eat their young at birth. Here is an example of why that is not necessarily bad .
76. Update: almost went to hospital, may still...
I'm sorry to worry everyone. Everyone here has been more supportive of me than I deserve or have any right to accept and I thank you for it!!!! I've dropped out, these last few days have been nervous breakdown hell I didn't attempt suicide but I was self harming, drinking till I blacked out and bin eating / purging, I've done some shameful stuff, nothing really bad just embarrassing, and my parents have had to do the leg work to get me out of the school while I went crazy. I've had breakdowns before but not quite this bad. I'm back home now trying to calm down and piece myself together. Trying to decide if I should admit myself to a mental health facility or not. The only real advantage of that would be that they could monitor me closely while they tried to adjust / change my meds to something that might be better. I don't know. I'm exhausted. I think I'll sleep the next few days. I know there is more to life than college. Even if I can't hack that, but I can't help but feel my life is over. It will take a few days at east before I'm thinking straight.
As was predicted, Loconuts' college career has come to an end, again. While he was hiding, his poor parents checked him out.Some animals in the wild eat their young at birth. Here is an example of why that is not necessarily bad .
This guy is a walking argument for insane asylums. He can not take care of himself and is a total mess. His parent should start the process to have him declared incompetent and have him admitted to a Healthcare facility likely long term.
Odd how the guy has the time, calm, composure, and perseverance to write tomes on an internet message board, but shits himself when someone - horrors- gives him homework.
Response to Locut0s (Original post)
Wed Sep 18, 2013, 03:10 AM
Locut0s (4,140 posts)
76. Update: almost went to hospital, may still...
I'm sorry to worry everyone. Everyone here has been more supportive of me than I deserve or have any right to accept and I thank you for it!!!! I've dropped out, these last few days have been nervous breakdown hell I didn't attempt suicide but I was self harming, drinking till I blacked out and bin eating / purging, I've done some shameful stuff, nothing really bad just embarrassing, and my parents have had to do the leg work to get me out of the school while I went crazy. I've had breakdowns before but not quite this bad. I'm back home now trying to calm down and piece myself together. Trying to decide if I should admit myself to a mental health facility or not. The only real advantage of that would be that they could monitor me closely while they tried to adjust / change my meds to something that might be better. I don't know. I'm exhausted. I think I'll sleep the next few days. I know there is more to life than college. Even if I can't hack that, but I can't help but feel my life is over. It will take a few days at east before I'm thinking straight.
Especially considering that the vast majority of college homework, in my experience, is reading and writing, particularly for liberal arts majors.
I'd have sympathy if LocoNuts could brealy string a sentence together, but that isn't the case.
Not sure that's an indicator of the deranged. Some of the subway cat's posts are very well written and she was hauled off in cuffs to the hospital.
That's sort of my point. They are strikingly lucid and literate when they sit to write about themselves, aren't they?
Not sure that's an indicator of the deranged. Some of the subway cat's posts are very well written and she was hauled off in cuffs to the hospital.I can't read her crazy rants, jammed together with no spaces. They give me a headache.
I can't read her crazy rants, jammed together with no spaces. They give me a headache.
That's sort of my point. They are strikingly lucid and literate when they sit to write about themselves, aren't they?
So was the Unabomber :mental:
Touche ^5
Oh, I can't read her stuff either, GOBUCKS. The content and length alone are formidable. The style makes it impossible.