primitives discuss divorce

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/11514986

Oh my.

The hypochondrial primitive's marriage is over.

mopinko (40,434 posts)    Tue Mar 4, 2014, 08:03 PM

hey guys. how is every one?

considering the slime that has been slithering around these days i am sort of hesitant to post my business here, but…
 
so, after 32 years and 4+1 kids, many ups and downs, and breakdowns, my marriage is over.

i have really been doing well, which, of course tips co-dependant bs. very happy with meds, and with treatment of some chronic health/pain problems, i am feeling pretty strong. so, i can't do the crazy go round with him any more.

i am quite convinced that he is borderline. he recently admitted to me that he knew there was something wrong with his brain. that there was a switch, where black became white, and he could not stop it.

his brother and i have tried to figure out if he was depressed. it seems that way when he is in the black faze. everyone is evil. out to get him. he engages in incredibly petty sniping in the middle of armageddon.

we went to hawaii in january, and had 10 days of bliss. we got home and he had a rough landing in reality. he went off, and just turned on my in a most viscous and stupid way.

also, he is a vp in a big financial institution. need to say more?

this has gone on and on. i can't do it any more.

i am done.

i am taking care of myself,

i am a free woman.

and the judge will gleefully give me that which he would begrudge me till the day he dies.

of course, he will not leave the house. but it is a big house.

there is plenty of money. i will be fine.

just had to spit it out.

elleng (45,754 posts)    Tue Mar 4, 2014, 08:17 PM

1. Thanks for sharing, very sorry for all the aggravation,

and happy you are done, taking care of yourself, and a free woman.

Some crap happening here with older daughter, may share later.

^^^another one who took her ex-husband to the cleaners.

mopinko (40,434 posts)    Tue Mar 4, 2014, 09:23 PM

2. this is not the first time

that i have shared my ups and downs here. i know we are sisters in shit.

i count this as our third big divorce. a zillion little quakes. no excuses for me. i should have known.

elleng (45,754 posts)    Tue Mar 4, 2014, 09:30 PM

3. Yes, sisters in shit,

and quakes for both of us, mine only ending with his death (after a fairly extended period of peace, well after our separation.)
 
Just recently considered having SocSec recognize that I got my name back (from divorce from 1st husband, many years ago). Need document from Cook County court, and but for all the other stuff happening here (new grandbaby coming, in MD!,) lived in Chicago 10+ years, I might hop over there and meet you 'actually!'

hunter (18,725 posts)    Wed Mar 5, 2014, 12:33 AM

8. I've never enjoyed a life that's not twisted in some way.

Oft times it hurts.

It seems like I'm a very lucky human being.

I've never considered myself not "free." That's probably some clueless autistic spectrum disability. Like the relative at family picnics and who stared silently at the ants crawling up and down the trees.
 
Or a great aunt, subsidized by family, who never went anywhere, living between her apartment and the grocery store. (Sadly, she did not write, or talk much.)
 
But my fear is that it's the depression thing. Been homeless, been hurting, and times I've felt like dropping dead on the streets wouldn't be such a horrible thing.
 
I take powerful nasty meds with irritating side effects for that, and they do work, more or less.

mopinko (40,434 posts)    Wed Mar 5, 2014, 08:54 AM

10. well i "haven't worked" in nearly 30 years.

just raised 5 kids, rehabbed an old house, made art, helped elect a president, now building a farm. you know, the life of riley, while the poor old man slaves. with someone so unstable, it is hard to sleep tight.
 
i am trying hard to retain my compassion, and understand that he cant help his kinks and quirks. i thought that might help, but when someone works as hard as he does to make sure that you are hobbled and wont run away, well…...

fizzgig (19,681 posts)    Wed Mar 5, 2014, 02:57 AM

9. good to hear from you

been thinking on you a lot lately. i'm sorry you're going through this, but we have to take care of ourselves.
 
been loving the farm updates, btw.

peace and low stress, my friend

mopinko (40,434 posts)    Wed Mar 5, 2014, 08:57 AM

12. thinkin about you too fizz

my kids are grown, my needs are small, there is plenty here for both of us as long as he keeps his job.

retirement is well planned as well.
 
glad you like the farm. it takes you along with it. i don't have to think too much, just watch the seasons and keep up. it's the best thing that ever happened to me.

i have to keep his bullshit out of it. it aint the kind you can grow stuff with.

mopinko (40,434 posts)    Wed Mar 5, 2014, 09:03 AM

15. well, looks like he might move out.

we have a 2 flat that is on the other side of the farm- so 2 doors away.

he says he is planning to tell the 1st floor tenants that we will not renew their lease in may.

as relieved as i will be to get him out, this breaks my heart. (which, of course, he knows) we have a wonderful woman from nigeria and her 2 boys. she is so happy to be there, and treats me like family. now she will have to go out and try to find another decent place that will take 2 black boys. oy.

Lady Freedom Returns (6,772 posts)    Thu Mar 6, 2014, 09:56 AM

16. Sounds like congratulations on a new start.

<<<wonders if mopinko should hitch up with her pal Skippy.

[Carl]

Even though probably a hate filled lunatic still for the moment the luckiest man alive.

[JohnnyReb]

Her needs are small....she will try her best to get bye on a living wage....$10,000.00 a month will do.

[BannedFromDU]

    What a disgusting sack of shit,  disparaging the vocation of someone who supported her fat sorry dyke - looking
ass. Too bad you can't split your fat ass down the middle like you will the assets, you scrunt, then you might not be able to attract another man. Scumbag ingrate.

[Chris_]

of course, he will not leave the house. but it is a big house.

well, looks like he might move out.

we have a 2 flat that is on the other side of the farm- so 2 doors away.

he says he is planning to tell the 1st floor tenants that we will not renew their lease in may.

as relieved as i will be to get him out, this breaks my heart. (which, of course, he knows) we have a wonderful woman from nigeria and her 2 boys. she is so happy to be there, and treats me like family. now she will have to go out and try to find another decent place that will take 2 black boys. oy.

I guess that "big house" wasn't quite so big after all.  Obviously not enough room to share with the poor Nigerian woman and her children.

[obumazombie]

That had to be a well hidden scarlet letter. How could any lib in good standing be married to an executive in a FINANCIAL INSTITUTION ???

[Vagabond]

Eh Gods am I ever cynical these days.

The way I read it she wanted that one last happy outing with him to Hawaii and planned out what she was going to do to shove him over the edge when they got back.  She wants the divorce?  Then why doesn't she leave and make her own way?  He paid for that house by her admission, so why should she get to keep it?  He is making a mistake to leave at all.

I admit, that I had a switch like she is describing.  It came when I realized that there was absolutely nothing that would appease my wife, nothing that would make her display anything but the obvious contempt that she held me in. 

Now, I look back and honestly think how much cheaper a hooker would have been.  I am not sure that is a healthy line of thought.

[txradioguy]

So basically he waited until the kids were out of the house to finally dump his lunatic wife.

Wanna be he settles down with a like minded (read Conservative) woman of slightly younger age?

I feel for the guy...knowing what mopinko is like I'm not sure if I could have waited till the kids had moved out.

[diesel driver]

The DUmp's resident perpetual moocher chimes in:

Lady Freedom Returns (6,772 posts)    Thu Mar 6, 2014, 09:56 AM

16. Sounds like congratulations on a new start.

I like to see your fat, sorry ass "start" anything on your own other than a run on the supermarket, loser!!!

[franksolich]

I admit, that I had a switch like she is describing.  It came when I realized that there was absolutely nothing that would appease my wife, nothing that would make her display anything but the obvious contempt that she held me in. 

Now, I look back and honestly think how much cheaper a hooker would have been.  I am not sure that is a healthy line of thought.

The part in bold above describes the situation rather well.

As for your second comment, it wouldn't have been the ideal situation, but given the circumstances, it might've been about the best short-term temporary solution.

[lastparker]

Quote
Lady Freedom Returns (6,772 posts)    Thu Mar 6, 2014, 09:56 AM

16. Sounds like congratulations on a new start.

Looks like someone has her eyes on the soon-to-be vacated Nigerian flat.

[Skul]

Looks like someone has her eyes on the soon-to-be vacated Nigerian flat.

Here comes another wishapoo beg for transportation money.

[BannedFromDU]

Looks like someone has her eyes on the soon-to-be vacated Nigerian flat.

     I daresay Amber may have her eyes on something else, which is neither Nigerian nor is it vaguely flat.

[obumazombie]

Here comes another wishapoo beg for transportation money.

I like where you're going with that. Laying the foundation.

The DUmp's resident perpetual moocher chimes in:

I like to see your fat, sorry ass "start" anything on your own other than a run on the supermarket, loser!!!

Does "sorry" include lazy ? What about shiftless ? Layabout ? With an arse as big as hers it might take a whole lot of adjectives to describe. Or...fewer more image packed adjectives. Like a diesel fuel with the best cetane rating !

[Ralph Wiggum]

Memo to "mopinko".  There is something called a shift key.  Holding that down creates capital letters, you know, the type you are supposed to use to being a sentence.  Learn it, love it, live it.

[franksolich]

Memo to "mopinko".  There is something called a shift key.  Holding that down creates capital letters, you know, the type you are supposed to use to being a sentence.  Learn it, love it, live it.

It's an example of the usual Freudian subconscious contempt that the primitives have for each other.

Neatness and correctness takes care, and one does such courtesies if one respects one's audience.

But since the hypochondrial primitive apparently doesn't really like her fellow primitives, she doesn't care if she looks sloppy, dirty, and careless in front of them.

[JohnnyReb]

Wasn't she the one with a thing with/for the cabin boy on last years trip? Did cabin boy offer a better deal this time around?

[franksolich]

Wasn't she the one with a thing with/for the cabin boy on last years trip? Did cabin boy offer a better deal this time around?

No, that was Pamela, the then-"greenbriar" primitive.

The "mopinko" primitive's apparently been monogamous--taking all those pharmaceuticals depresses the sexual lusts--unless she's done a swing or two with Skippy when he's been in Chicago to adore his hero, the terrorist William Ayers.

[Ralph Wiggum]

It's an example of the usual Freudian subconscious contempt that the primitives have for each other.

Neatness and correctness takes care, and one does such courtesies if one respects one's audience.

But since the hypochondrial primitive apparently doesn't really like her fellow primitives, she doesn't care if she looks sloppy, dirty, and careless in front of them.

One hopes that she doesn't answer the front door with her robe swinging open. 

[Dori]

Memo to "mopinko".  There is something called a shift key.  Holding that down creates capital letters, you know, the type you are supposed to use to being a sentence.  Learn it, love it, live it.

Seabeyond is worse. 

[Chris_]

I can overlook the lack of capital letters... it's lazy, but DUmmies ARE lazy.  What makes me roll my eyes are the randomly-capitalized words that have no rhyme or reason.

[GOBUCKS]

Don't forget the now-absent UGP refusing to hit the space bar between sentences.

I think some DUmmies see these annoying traits errors as their trademark, similar to how so many people have long, stupid, annoying sig lines.

This board could be better, for example, if we had "ignore thread", but thankfully we can turn off sig lines.

[obumazombie]

Don't forget the now-absent UGP refusing to hit the space bar between sentences.

I think some DUmmies see these annoying traits errors as their trademark, similar to how so many people have long, stupid, annoying sig lines.

This board could be better, for example, if we had "ignore thread", but thankfully we can turn off sig lines.

You mean a CC ignore board ? How would that work ? I must be naive about it, because I've never heard of one.