Hey now! Grits is a staple of us rednecks! How can you not eat them?
I hate grits. Dunno what's in them, but I hate 'em and I'm too lazy to look it up.
True story. Years ago, I got sent down to NC, Charlotte I think it was. Pretty big city. Anyway, I had to stay overnight. I get up the next morning and go to the fast food place across from the hotel to get some breakfast. I think it was Hardees or maybe McD's. I ordered their biggest breakfast platter and they put it in a clamshell. I go to the table, open it up, and right in the center is what looked to me like puke, all over the other stuff.
Well I took it back up to the counter, asked to speak to the manager, he came up and I said someone puked in my food and I wanted a new platter. He opened it up, laughed, and said it was grits. I said what? He said grits! Asked where I was from. Anyway he said to try it and if I didn't like it, he would make me a new platter. Well I had never had grits so I tried it. Tasted like what it looked like. He saw me coming back up to the counter and shook his head. Anyway he made me a new platter minus the grits, I thanked him, and I went on my way.
3 years later I get sent down there to train some managers on some new health regs that was coming out in that area. So I am standing up explaining this stuff, and lo and behold, at the question and answer part of it, this guy stands up and asks if I still hated grits.
It was the same guy. Of course I didn't remember him, but he remembered me and the rest of the managers at the class laughed their ass of when he told the story. From that day forward whenever I would go down there to train them they always brought me a thing of grits with a little placard on it that said: "Grits made especially for Perky" .
Anyway I got to know them pretty well and I started bringing them a couple of quarts of Granddad's 'shine labeled "Grits killer" whenever I was down there. My training session down there always had 100 percent attendance.