The President's New Clothes

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August 6, 2011
The President's New Clothes
By Matt Holzmann

Gather round, children, and I will tell you the story of the President's New Clothes.

Once upon a time, there was a vain president in far off Washington whose only worry in life was to dress in elegant clothes and have parties. He began by holding weekly soiree's, and then twice per week, and then three times per week. And at each soiree' he loved to show off his new clothes and played with the presidential Teleprompter telling ever more outrageous stories.

His consort, Princess Shopping Cart, would also dress up in the most expensive and outrageous outfits, which disturbed the common folk to no end while the sycophants and hangers-on all cried with joy at her inventiveness. The plebes, however, began to call her Princess Gaga.

The President and his Princess had the most wonderful times eating cake and spending the plebe's money with their rich liberal friends, who all professed their solidarity with the plebes as they ate cake.

"Whadda Maroon"