Been married 23 years, 21 of which I was married to the military. My husband deployed more some years than he was home (USAF have been on a fixed rotation to the sand box since Desert Storm, then of course came the Billy-Jeff humanitarian mission years). When he was away, the military was my family. It has always been this way for the USAF. I am surprised you felt so all alone, as I would imagine the Navy would have very close military family communities.
It is very close ,unfortunately I myself was never the kind to join woman's groups, I learned very early in life from my Mother that SOME, not all, could become a breeding pit for vipers and the lonly woman that had nothing to do but put down others that they felt did not fit in or are jealous of.
Example, some idiot woman hearing a rumor that there had been an accident on the boat called me out of the blue to with much excitement inform me of a non existant accident. ARGGGGGG. I was 7 months pregnant and scared me to death.
The one and only wife's meeting I went to began to trash a wife with a handicapped child, seems these woman must have spent hours outside her home watching her. None of these woman knew her except in passing, I baby sat for the woman.
The woman had a brother in the Navy on board a floter and would visit her as would her father and mother. Her family checked in on her and the baby often when her hubby was gone to sea.
Unbelievable the problems that came up, the brother and father were now her boyfriends that came when Hubby was out to sea. Soon a couple of wives wrote to their Hubbys that this woman was carrying on, and naturally down the line the husband heard all this.
Neither the husband or wife felt the need to tell anyone about anyone that came to their home, and the fact they did not set people straight led to big problems for them.
The one meeting I went to I blew sky high on these harpies, said my piece and walked out. I had just a few wives friends on the boat, those that stayed far and away from the wives clubs.
I did make friends with the wives who had no connection to Hubbys boat or job. At one time in temporary housing we found ourselves livng in an area of 60% black familys, Marines, and Navy. Best time of our lives. we all pulled together, learned each others traditions and laughed and cried at the strange ideas we had about each others race.
To this day I am very careful of making friends, politics runs deep in friendship, either you love or hate the same thing or you make enemys of those that do not agree with you.
Hard to hold ones tongue when the wives get together and complain about some yeast infection they get every time their Hubby comes home from overseas. Their husbands stand about
while the Navy Doctors tell the woman it is because it is the wifes fault, they do not wipe correctly or take bubble baths. One does not get out medical books to show a wife they have VD, I just had to grit my teeth. Best to mind my own business and take care of my own family.
Long time ago, the kids father died 25 years ago, we went through some crazy times together.