Congratulations! to the #04 Top DUmmie of 2014,
Lady Freedom Returns!
Amber hasn’t been on the radar a very long, maybe about three years, but she’s already collected two major awards.
2013 #02 Top DUmmie
2013 the Robyn McGrath award, the “Robâ€
Amber’s about 30 years old and perhaps ten times that weight; she has a degree in “communications,†an incredible feat considering she hasn’t learned how to spell, and use, words yet.
However, she slipped this year, and it’s very likely this’ll be her final appearance in the Top DUmmies.
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Amber first blipped on the radar when she grandiosely announced to the primitives that she and her then-boyfriend, finding nothing but desolation and hopelessness in Joplin, Missouri, after that big tornado, were moving to Seattle, Washington.
And they were going to
hike there, making an “event†out of it.
They walked a few inches over into the border with Kansas, and then turned around and went back to Joplin. That might’ve been because her then-boyfriend’s pretty old, about twice her age, and Amber’s pretty--well, pretty “plus-sized.â€
After which a curtain descended for some months, and then presto! Amber and her then-boyfriend were abruptly in Tucson, Arizona.
They weren’t there but a short time before her then-boyfriend dumped her, ordering her out of the place, which apparently was rented under his name.
Having nowhere else to go, Amber borrowed money from her loving, caring sisters, Crystal and Annette, back in Joplin, and returned there, where she worked as a “convenient†store clerk for all of three weeks, and then because another primitive had paid for the ticket, got on a bus and headed back to Tucson.
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LFR is a poster child for why we should still have loony bins. She lives in a fairy tale land concocted inside her own head. She's probably still living in that section 8 housing…..We haven't heard mention of those “better†jobs she applied for, and then all of the sudden, she has a “new†telemarketing job, after she got promoted at the last one to trainer.
Meanwhile, we haven't heard anything about the shock treatments anymore that she was getting at Arizona State, Dreamboat Dave, her motorcycle buddy, White Cloud, her “paintingsâ€, or her jewelry she was hocking. Even the other primitives have grown weary of her stupid narratives that go absolutely nowhere, and lack continuity from one day to the next.
The last sentence above, dear readers, is why probably by this time next year, Amber will be a distant memory. Much of the time, she’s reduced to simply posting links to music videos, which evokes a great big gaping “yawn†from decent and civilized people and most primitives.
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It’s been obvious that much of what Amber alleges is pure fantasy.
So then…..what’s
really going on with Amber?
The possibilities are many:
Number one, she’s living with an elderly relative in Tucson, getting a few things from social services as she flits from job to job; or
Number two, she’s living in subsidized housing in a poor part of Tucson, getting a few things from social services as she flits from job to job; or
Number three, she’s living in a halfway house of some sort, and mandatorily subjecting herself to all sorts of medical and psychiatric experiments; or
Number four, she’s hospitalized, but with a little bit of freedom to go about on her own (such as to the library to hang around the other primitives), and mandatorily subjecting herself to all sorts of medical and psychiatric experiments; or
Number five, because of the tragic imminent death of her ancient father, God have mercy on him, she’s back in Joplin.
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The last possibility, number five, would actually be the best for Amber,
provided she puts her life and whatever money she earns doing whatever she does for money, into the gentle hands of her much-wiser sisters Crystal and Annette.
The girl needs guidance and direction, and while Crystal and Annette aren’t anybody to write home about, their advice and counsel--and total control of her and her behavior--is about the best for which Amber can hope.
One of course wishes the best for Amber, and that’s the best she can hope to get.