Author Topic: Relax and sip on some top shelf DUmp nuttiness. Must be read to be believed.  (Read 2044 times)

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Offline BattleHymn

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http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018812976

Seriously.  I have nothing to add to this thread.  Just read it.  I wasn't sure whether to put this one into Mind Numbing Stupidity or in The DUmpster, but settled on this.  This thread is sure to become a classic (at least in my book).   

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Fri Nov 6, 2015, 09:16 PM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)

I am having rotten luck with frogs.

When I removed a canopy the other day, I pinched one between the fabric and the PVC, but didn't know he was stuck. He looked fine and appeared to be hiding so I left him alone. I came back two hours later and found him hanging by his neck and shoulder. Fluid was filling up in his lower abdomen so I thought he was dead. But I managed to move the pipe and he was strong enough to evade me. I don't know if his hand is smashed beyond repair, but I haven't seen him since.

And tonight, a small one got into the house. We have one of the moisture removing air conditions so I don't have much hope for him. I'll leave a bowl of water out but that will only help for a few days. The small ones are harder to catch than the big ones.

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Fri Nov 6, 2015, 09:34 PM
Star Member WheelWalker (5,164 posts)
1. There is hope. My grandson found a small tree frog dried up and, it appeared,

forever immobile; but, compassionate as he is toward reptiles and amphibs, he wrapped it in a saturated towel and not too long later we heard the immortal "croak". Seriously, the thing was dry as toast, and was reconstituted... an event celebrated here as a miracle of tenacity.

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Fri Nov 6, 2015, 09:41 PM
Star Member applegrove (68,701 posts)
2. I love frogs. My mom and I once drove home at night along a highway

through a armada of frogs, and of course many died as they were hopping across a 4 lane highway. The pouring rain may have lured them to their deaths. That haunts me to this day it was so traumatizing. I collect frogs I find in stores. Didn't know I was going a collector of anything but I worked in a gift shop that had all sorts of froggy like things. It brought back the joy of childhood and helping toads along the dirt road or playing in the frog pond as a kid.

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Fri Nov 6, 2015, 10:51 PM
Star Member TexasBushwhacker (4,694 posts)
7. They go into aestivation

It's a process like hibernation, except it's in response to dryness and heat. Their metabolism slows and they store urine in their bladder which provides enough water to great them through the dry season.

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Fri Nov 6, 2015, 11:21 PM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)
8. I wonder how many dessicated frogs ended up in the trash heap, that could

have been saved.



And, away we go:

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 01:22 AM
passiveporcupine (3,317 posts)
10. I have a kitchen tree frog

She's been living on my kitchen counter since summer...in a week it will be three months. She came in during the summer drought to get water and once she discovered my sink, that was it. I'm still feeding her bugs that I find, but will have to buy food for her soon. She refuses to stay outside. I've put her out dozens of times and the next day she's right back up on my sink. I made her a little cardboard house to hide in and she is finally using it. Right now she is soaking in my mortar and pestle, which sits in the window sill. I keep a little water in it for her, and also a flat water plate in the sink at night when I go to bed.

She is adorable, and I just hope she survives till spring when the boys start calling for girlfriends. It gets pretty cold in my place in deep winter, so she may actually hibernate in here.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 01:44 AM
Star Member Laffy Kat (1,979 posts)
11. That is so cool. A kitchen frog.

Does she have a name? Just be careful of the disposal.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 02:00 AM
passiveporcupine (3,317 posts)
12. I have not been able to figure out a name that stuck yet.

I don't have a disposal, so no worries there. She has made me super OCD about keeping the counters and sinks absolutely clean (no soap residue or anything anywhere), because they don't drink water. They sit in it and absorb it through their skin, so they are very susceptible to toxins they come in contact with. So far so good and my kitchen is cleaner than it's ever been. It's like Pippy Longstockings who used to make cookies on her kitchen floor (well, my floor isn't that clean   ). I have cats and dogs all over, so no cookies on the floor. But you could eat off my kitchen counters.   

I don't have to worry as much during the day, but when I go to bed, she comes out to use the sink, so I can't go to bed until I know it's pristine!

I sing to her every day.

Somewhere down in Yackety Yack,
A tree frog jumped from bank to bank
Just because there's nothing better to do

She stubbed her toe, fell in the water
You could hear her holler for a mile and a quarter
Just because there's nothing better to do.

Whose song was this? I changed it a little. It was about a male bull frog. Woody Guthrie maybe? She just watches me most of the day, or sometimes she just sits on the backsplash and goes to sleep. Doesn't matter how much noise I make around her.   She just sits there waiting to be fed.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 09:28 AM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)
13. I am learning all kinds of things about house frogs in this thread.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 04:12 PM
passiveporcupine (3,317 posts)
16. I had to do a lot of reading after my frog moved in

They really are fascinating and I knew almost nothing about them. I hope your squishy frog made it. They are pretty flexible, so it's possible. They really do love to hide under tarps. I find them outside under my tarps every time I have to move or replace one. They hibernate under them every winter.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 09:35 AM
Star Member Laffy Kat (1,979 posts)
14. Wow. What a great frog mommy you are!

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 04:08 PM
passiveporcupine (3,317 posts)
15. Well, I consider it a special treat

Not an experience I'm ever likely to have again.

I just thought of a name for her this morning and I think I like it. I met a beautiful and sweet young woman at the laundromat on Monday, who helped me make a pleasant visit out of a trip that I was really dreading. I hate laundromats, but I tore my down comforter trying to wash it in a top loader at home. She worked there and was so helpful showing me how to use these new complicated machines, and it was late at night and we chatted the whole time I was there, while she folded laundry. Her name is Yesenia, and her nickname is Yesi, which I think is so cute. I showed her some pictures of my frog (I keep my camera in my purse) and she was delighted...I think I'm going to call the frog Yesi in her honor.

I wish I could post some pics here, but I'm technologically challenged and don't know how to do wifi yet. I need to download them onto a laptop I haven't even learned how to use yet, with wifi, so all the pictures I'm taking on my new camera are still sitting on the camera. The PC I'm using now is not wifi capable. I even bought a cable from Amazon to manually download pics, but it's so short I have to lay on the floor under my desk to use it and my body won't let me do that.

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 11:01 PM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)
19. The frog has been saved!

He got to the far side of the house and in just 24 hours he had lost the vigor in his hop so it was easy to scoop him up in cup.

When I dumped him on outside on familiar ground I swear he did a happy dance.

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Where I live is full of frogs and toads. I'm sending you all the frog and toad vibes I can.

I know the horror of hurting one unintentionally. Gah.

It's gonna be ok.
« Last Edit: November 08, 2015, 02:06:22 PM by BattleHymn »

Offline obumazombie

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A lib's greatest aspiration in life...to be a good "frog mommie".
There were only two options for gender. At last count there are at least 12, according to libs. By that standard, I'm a male lesbian.

Offline Texacon

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Oh ... geez. This is lame.

KC
  Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day.  Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

*Stolen

Offline BattleHymn

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So far so good and my kitchen is cleaner than it's ever been. It's like Pippy Longstockings who used to make cookies on her kitchen floor (well, my floor isn't that clean   ). I have cats and dogs all over, so no cookies on the floor. But you could eat off my kitchen counters.   

As opposed to before,when you couldn't eat off of them? 

Disgusting.

Offline hillneck

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So I guess me gigging frogs by the cooler full would send them over the edge?  Not to mention their legs deep fry just great. 
In battle you have to show no mercy for mercy comes after the war when you still have the freedom to ask for it.

"Montani Semper Liberi"

Pray as if God will take care of all; act as if all is up to you.

Offline BattleHymn

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So I guess me gigging frogs by the cooler full would send them over the edge?  Not to mention their legs deep fry just great.

I love to pan fry mine.  Just make sure to keep the lid on.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_K6VqEQuaA[/youtube]

Offline 98ZJUSMC

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We have one of the moisture removing air condition er s   Maybe?


Yeah, those are very rare.   ::)

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So far so good and my kitchen is cleaner than it's ever been. It's like Pippy Longstockings who used to make cookies on her kitchen floor (well, my floor isn't that clean   ). I have cats and dogs all over, so no cookies on the floor. But you could eat off my kitchen counters.

As opposed to before,when you couldn't eat off of them? 

Disgusting.

I don't know ..... the (D)ULLard might be on to something.  Sure saves on all that time-consuming pot, pan and dishes clean up.   :yum:
« Last Edit: November 08, 2015, 06:03:11 PM by 98ZJUSMC »
              

Liberal thinking is a two-legged stool and magical thinking is one of the legs, the other is a combination of self-loating and misanthropy.  To understand it, you would have to be able to sit on that stool while juggling two elephants, an anvil and a fragmentation grenade, sans pin.

"Accuse others of what you do." - Karl Marx

Offline 98ZJUSMC

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 11:01 PM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)
19. The frog has been saved!

He got to the far side of the house and in just 24 hours he had lost the vigor in his hop so it was easy to scoop him up in cup.

When I dumped him on outside on familiar ground I swear he did a happy dance.

Tales from Section Eight.
              

Liberal thinking is a two-legged stool and magical thinking is one of the legs, the other is a combination of self-loating and misanthropy.  To understand it, you would have to be able to sit on that stool while juggling two elephants, an anvil and a fragmentation grenade, sans pin.

"Accuse others of what you do." - Karl Marx

Offline fatboy

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Once upon a time we had a pet frog.

All was well until one day it croaked.  :lmao:
"We will bring back our jobs. We will bring back our borders. We will bring back our wealth - and we will bring back our dreams!" -President Donald J. Trump 1/20/17

Offline Carl

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Sat Nov 7, 2015, 11:01 PM
Star Member Baitball Blogger (21,783 posts)
19. The frog has been saved!

He got to the far side of the house and in just 24 hours he had lost the vigor in his hop so it was easy to scoop him up in cup.

When I dumped him on outside on familiar ground I swear he did a happy dance.

Crazy Bob is jealous.

Offline Skul

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(I keep my camera in my purse)
right next to the little bag holding my husband's testicles. :-)
Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline thundley4

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So I guess me gigging frogs by the cooler full would send them over the edge?  Not to mention their legs deep fry just great.

If I catch a small one while fishing, it goes on a hook as bait.

Offline landofconfusion80

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[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33H6cwcp4U0[/youtube]

something for the lurking primitives toking it up
One Who Grows (244 posts)
20. absolute bullshit. the cave is unspeakably vile.

I don't know how any of you can live with yourselves.

:)

Offline I_B_Perky

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I love to pan fry mine.  Just make sure to keep the lid on.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_K6VqEQuaA[/youtube]

Tastes like chicken!   :-)
Living in the Dummies minds rent free since 2009!

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Offline FiddyBeowulf

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Fire...BAD!!! - John Fetterman


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Offline FaC

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Try not to cry when you realize these people can vote.

And breed, assuming they can find somebody that is attracted to, or at least is willing to put up with abject stupidity....

Offline BattleHymn

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And breed, assuming they can find somebody that is attracted to, or at least is willing to put up with abject stupidity....

Stevenumbers would hit it.  The primitive, and the frog.

Offline BattleHymn

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*********************THREAD UPDATE*************************************
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018813479


Now with photos!!!!

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Mon Nov 9, 2015, 02:08 AM
passiveporcupine (3,330 posts)

My kitchen tree frog, Yesi

I'm working on this picture thing...I swear...But I have a long way to go.

I have a new camera that I don't know how to use yet. New software that came with it that I only tried for the first time today (after finally crawling under my desk and getting my cable hooked up so I can transfer photos to my PC...not easy to do (cable is too short), but I got it done.

I just created an account in photobucket, and downloaded some pics of my little kitchen frog, Yesi, and here they are.

They are not good quality, because I still have a lot to learn about manipulating them for size, lighting, etc. But I hope you can see her. She is adorable.

I made her a little house to hide in. It sits in the corner behind my espresso machine.

I bought her a tree to climb.

The first time I saw her up on the counter...sitting on an onion

I think she saw a mosquito on the wall over the sink...or she just felt like exploring

She finds lots of cool places to sit

She likes being up high

Here's a closeup


She's been with me almost three months, and I hope she makes it till spring, when I'm pretty sure she will take off when the boys start serenading the girls. She keeps me busy, but it's a pretty cool treat to have a frog living with you by choice...not locked up as a pet.

BTW, I do clean my windows, but a humming bird feeder hangs outside the kitchen window. When the rain hits it, it splashes all over my window. Sorry about that.   Also, I did not pick the kitchen colors.   

I love this little girl.

This DUmpmonkey just shot into my DOTY nominations. 
« Last Edit: November 09, 2015, 04:52:04 PM by BattleHymn »

Offline BattleHymn

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Mon Nov 9, 2015, 04:39 PM
passiveporcupine (3,332 posts)
10. She has never made a peep

The boys are the croakers.

She poops one poop almost every day (some days no poop. It depends on how much she eats). She leaves them in interesting places, so I know where she's been that night.   I just wipe everything down with alcohol every morning.

Anybody up for some frog shit in your coffee? 

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Mon Nov 9, 2015, 04:45 PM
passiveporcupine (3,332 posts)
11. Yes, they hibernate in winter if outside.

I do wish she would stay outside and just be a normal frog, because inside it might not get cold enough for her to hibernate and that means she needs to be fed all winter (I think). I e-mailed Oregon forest and wildlife for info on that, but got no reply. I don't know if she will go into a natural hibernation state inside from lack of food, or if it would just kill her. So I will buy her food once I can't find any more insects.

When your brand of batshit is too batshit even for the Oregon government tree huggers, you have a problem.

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Mon Nov 9, 2015, 05:50 PM
passiveporcupine (3,332 posts)
14. I have six cats

And two are hunters, but they are all getting older and they don't pay attention to frogs any more. They still want to catch hummingbirds.

« Last Edit: November 09, 2015, 05:05:34 PM by BattleHymn »

Offline Revolution

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You know that old commercial, BH...

The best part of waking up...is frog shit in your cup.


These people are amazing. Creepy thread is creepy.

:usflag: :salutearmy: :saluteaf: :saluteusmc: :salutenavy: :taps:
THANK YOU for what you do!

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Guns do not kill people. Rotting, festering, disgusting, grimy, evil, un-reparable souls kill people.

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Offline Ken8521

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Amazing what these idiots will do for a frog, but an unborn child is completely disposable.


Offline BlueStateSaint

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Amazing what these idiots will do for a frog, but an unborn child is completely disposable.

H5 for that.
"Timid men prefer the calm of despotism to the tempestuous sea of Liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

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Chase her.
Chase her even when she's yours.
That's the only way you'll be assured to never lose her.

Offline njpines

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OMG, disgusting but I had to hold both hands over my mouth so I wouldn't completely lose it laughing and drop dead here at work. You guys are the best!

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ienp4J3pW7U[/youtube]
Piney Power!!

Grow your own dope -- plant a Democrat!

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