NanceGreggs pretends to be Sarah Palin, fails

[RobJohnson]

NanceGreggs  (1000+ posts)        Sat Jul-04-09 02:36 AM

Goodbye, DU - You Betcha! 

 Edited on Sat Jul-04-09 02:41 AM by NanceGreggs

Being as I have only been a lurker here and never an offishul member of this board, I have asked NanceGreggs to post my GBCW thread for me:

My RL name is Sarah Palin, and as some of you now know, today I resigned from my governorship of Alaska – because I love Alaska, and Alaskans, and all things Alaskanesque, along with the troops, and Trig, and General MacArthur, and everybody and everything that doesn’t get in my way, or on my last nerve, or can’t be shot and killed from a helicopter.

I have been maligned by you people from the beginning – those of you who don’t understand the weight of responsibility that rests on the shoulders of someone who may come off as a clueless airhead but is actually an honest-to-God, well-endowed woman trying to make her way in the world of politics, which has become a blood-sport and wastes the tax dollars of hard working Alaskans who deserve better, dontcha know, people who actually grasp the idea that Putin’s head is not just a figure of speech but a real threat to those of us who are outside that politics-as-usual thing that people like Katie Couric will never take to her bosom – and speaking of bosoms, I’ve got a pretty good pair and ain’t afraid to say so or show them off when my country is in need of a coupla of good-lookin’ tits wrapped in a coupla thousand-dollar-plus outfits, because it’s all about being who you are, just a regular soccer-hockey-baseball-basketball-whatever-sport-ya-like mom and playin’ it for all its worth.

I have been accused – here and elsewhere – of being an idiotic, ill-informed, unethical, narcissistic trollop, and I am used to the accusations because I have lived with them all my life, and I don’t understand why except that maybe it’s true, but shouldn’t that all be beside the point when my brother-in-law is out to get me back, and now there’s this thing with the house that my husband built with his own two hands in between snow machining and whatever else it is that he does, and doesn’t it count for anything that I went right ahead and used my own children as campaign props, and that Levi has some nerve, what with his drug-addled family and his pulling-out of my daughter’s life after she gave birth instead of pulling out when it would have done me some good.

I know the rumors are flying right now – about criminal investigations, and tax evasion, and embezzlement and God-only-knows-what, because I’ll be damned if I know – which may explain why I can’t articulate what I mean, or why I’m resigning, because I’ve made my position clear already and don’t ask me to repeat it.

I’m just a sweet Wasilla girl who don’t have time to read a newspaper or keep abreast (speaking of breasts – have you seen mine?) of whether a stop-over to refuel in Ireland counts as having been instrumental in pursuing an international agenda that embraces our traditional enemies – like the Irish, fr’instance.

You are no doubt going to be seeing all kinds of nasty stuff about me in the days to come, and if you are stupid enough to believe the facts over what I’ve been telling you for months, well, there ya go. That’s why people like me never get to be all we can be, or achieve all we are capable of doing, because people like you let facts get in the way of just saying, “Hey, what the f*ck, I’d rather have a VP who Tina Fey can impersonate than someone named Joe – who I can wink at and call by his first name – acting responsibly in office.”

In closing, I’d just like to say that you can spare me the don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out comments. I am not interested in what you think of me, or what the voters think of me. I am only interested in what I think of me, and I think I am FANTASTIC. How that attitude alone didn’t catapult me, along with the propaganda, into higher office is beyond me.

I may be down, but I ain’t out. Mark my words, DU.

Note from NanceGreggs: This woman is an idiot. What’s scary is not the FACT that she’s an idiot, but the fact that some people actually never noticed – and were willing to vote for her.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8510524
 

[RobJohnson]

Divine Discontent  (1000+ posts)        Sat Jul-04-09 03:43 AM
Response to Original message
14. Please don't..... Cut & Run, Sarah!
 Edited on Sat Jul-04-09 03:45 AM by Divine Discontent
maybe just take a few days away instead of kissing us off permanently? Just think about it and come back in a week or two, and I have a good feeling that upon your return, if you winked a few extra times, threw in a handful 'you betchas', and tossed in a sports analogy here & there to explain to us ignorant liberals why we need to vote GOP-only, that we might chum up to your high couture wrapped breasts & cocky finger pointing!




(I lurve NG!) 

[The Village Idiot]

whatever happened to FGL??

oh wait!

[Traveshamockery]

NanceGreggs is an attention whore.  And she seems very angry these days.  I am sure there's a little bit of jealousy there seeing that Sarah Palin is probably a whole lot prettier, a whole lot smarter, and way more accomplished than the old drunk that we know as NanceGreggs. 

It's been almost six months since Obamalamadingdong and his merry band of thugs took over.  I thought America was going to become a utopian society when the democrats were in control.  What's up with that, Nance? 

BTW - it appears Nance has a website dedicated to who else?  NanceGreggs!  There might even be a picture or two of her there. 

 


http://nancerants.awardspace.com/about.html

 

[franksolich]

NanceGreggs is an attention whore.  And she seems very angry these days.  I am sure there's a little bit of jealousy there seeing that Sarah Palin is probably a whole lot prettier, a whole lot smarter, and way more accomplished than the old drunk that we know as NanceGreggs. 

It's been almost six months since Obamalamadingdong and his merry band of thugs took over.  I thought America was going to become a utopian society when the democrats were in control.  What's up with that, Nance? 

BTW - it appears Nance has a website dedicated to who else?  NanceGreggs!  There might even be a picture or two of her there. 

 


http://nancerants.awardspace.com/about.html

 

Not to mention the Nance Greggs idiot is a generation older than Sarah Palin.

There's jealousy involved here.

[Karin]

Her OP probably took over an hour to dream up and type out.  I didn't waste 3 seconds on it.  Fail.

[crockspot]

NanceGreggs is an attention whore.  And she seems very angry these days.  I am sure there's a little bit of jealousy there seeing that Sarah Palin is probably a whole lot prettier, a whole lot smarter, and way more accomplished than the old drunk that we know as NanceGreggs. 

It's been almost six months since Obamalamadingdong and his merry band of thugs took over.  I thought America was going to become a utopian society when the democrats were in control.  What's up with that, Nance? 

BTW - it appears Nance has a website dedicated to who else?  NanceGreggs!  There might even be a picture or two of her there. 

 


http://nancerants.awardspace.com/about.html

 

She's not quite as hideous looking as most of the DUmmy beast women. If I was totally shitfaced drunk, I'd probably let her give me oral.

[Karin]

Oh no you wouldn't.  And, don't you think she scoured everything from years ago to find the very best picture of herself? 

[DixieBelle]

^yeah that. Besides, the kind of ugly she is (and I'm talking in the soul, not the face) goes bone deep.

[BlueStateSaint]

She's not quite as hideous looking as most of the DUmmy beast women. If I was totally shitfaced drunk, I'd probably let her give me oral.

Do you really want to roll the dice on contracting an STD?

[jinxmchue]

I got bored at the "shot and killed from a helicopter" part and stopped reading.  Saved myself a couple minutes of my life.

[GOBUCKS]

Oh no you wouldn't.  And, don't you think she scoured everything from years ago to find the very best picture of herself? 

You are partially correct. The photo cuts out the guy next to her, because he's wearing a leisure suit and it's 1975.
But if drunk enough........it's a sure bet. Much stranger things have happened.

[Chris]

I got bored at the "shot and killed from a helicopter" part and stopped reading.  Saved myself a couple minutes of my life.

Who has the "portrait" of NanceGreggs, the drunken old crone scrawled on a bar napkin?

She's a bitter old harpy who may or may not have a drinking problem.  The only thing that differentiates her from the faceless lynch mob of nameless DUmmies is the length of the jabbering wall o' text she puts up at the DUmp.

[BlueStateSaint]

Who has the "portrait" of NanceGreggs, the drunken old crone scrawled on a bar napkin?

She's a bitter old harpy who may or may not have a drinking problem.  The only thing that differentiates her from the faceless lynch mob of nameless DUmmies is the length of the jabbering wall o' text she puts up at the DUmp.

Which puts her into the same class of primitive as Will Pitt, IMO.  Not too sure if either one of them want that distinction.

[Ree]

She's not quite as hideous looking as most of the DUmmy beast women. If I was totally shitfaced drunk, I'd probably let her give me oral.

Darlin,now be honest, if ya was that "shitfaced drunk" ya'd let most anything give ya oral....

[The Village Idiot]

Darlin,now be honest, if ya was that "shitfaced drunk" ya'd let most anything give ya oral....

dogs, cats, gerbils

[claret1995]

 In the best interests of Nance Gregg. She should pretend to be intelligent and sober. That would be a good start.