Five Kinds of Sex
The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon; you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.
The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage; you'll have sex anywhere, anytime. Hence, also in the kitchen.
The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.
The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "**** you!"
There is also a fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife ****s you in front of everyone in court.
