Welcome to the first of two campaign-and-voting threads for the Top DUmmies of 2013!
The second thread, for those who wish to express their sentiments about primitives, but only to a select audience, is at:
http://www.conservativecave.com/index.php/topic,92629.0.htmlVoting will be open from breakfast-time Sunday morning, December 8, through supper-time Saturday evening, December 14.
This thread, and the other one, will be “locked†to comments until the final ballot is appended Sunday morning. After that, both threads are wide open, receptive for comments.
All voting is done by secret ballot, and one may do so by sending one’s votes to Ralph Wiggum here, or to him at: ralphwiggumcave@outlook.com Mr. Wiggum counts the votes and keeps them confidential; franksolich simply writes the awards, nothing more.
The
recommended way of voting is via personal message to Mr. Wiggum here on conservativecave.
One is free to reveal how one has voted, in either of the two threads, but remember, those comments aren’t votes; they’re just comments.
Please vote first, and then comment away all one wants.Anyone in the whole wide world with an e-mail address is eligible to vote, but Mr. Wiggum retains the right to determine if a particular voter is
bona fide or malicious, and has the right to reject any ballots he believes are not sincere.
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After one has voted, one can change one’s votes any time up until the polls close Saturday evening, but when changing votes, please advise Mr. Wiggum it’s a change in votes, not an original ballot. He’s going to double-check anyway, but it’s a courtesy.
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One may vote for
ten primitives for Top DUmmie of 2013.
Votes are valuable; please don’t not use them, and vote for
ten, not one or three or six or something.
One may vote for one each for each of the special awards; the ballot’s pretty much self-explanatory.
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Votes for the top five DUmmies ARE WEIGHTED.
When voting, one should rank his top five preferences, #1, #2, #3, #4, #5.
Mr. Wiggum will then assign 5 votes to one’s first choice, four to one’s second, three to one’s third, two to one’s fourth, and one to one’s fifth.
Then one should list five more primitives in no particular order; primitives whom one thinks should be Top DUmmies, but not quite as high as one’s first five choices. Mr. Wiggum will then assign one-half vote to each of them.
The reason one’s top ten choices aren’t all weighted is because after about the first five, it gets murky, trying to decide if a primitive should be #6 or #8 or #10 or somewhere in between.
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Finally, I have to express my personal appreciation to Mr. Wiggum, who started the Top DUmmies back in 2005, but then time and circumstances gave the honor, the distinction, the joy, of writing the awards to me, franksolich.
Mr. Wiggum was not around to count the votes last year, during which time I learned what a nuisance, what a trouble, what a bother, it is. I don’t want to count votes again, ever. It’s a pain, and I’m very happy Mr. Wiggum is taking care of that end for me.
It’s really great, how two very different people can work so well together. On one hand, we got a guy who’s a professional, who’s good with chicks, who oozes confidence and competence out of every pore, and on the other hand, we got another guy who’s loud and raucous and breaks things.
But it works. Probably because neither of us are primitives.