Oh wow, what a can of worms this is. I don't say that sarcastically, either.
Should a woman...or a man for that matter...be forced - due to their religious beliefs to stay in a marriage with a spouse who sleeps with other people (or furry animals) because the Bible tells them to?
Should a woman ....or a man....be forced to stay in an abusive marriage.....where the spouse beats them, or verbally/emotional beats up on them on a continual basis?
Is that really the life that God wishes us to live...regardless of what the Bible says?
Or is that Man's intrepretation of what he thinks should be? after all, back in ancient times, even up until today in some countries....wife is thought of as Man's chattel. Not as a person with her own rights.
I read an
intrepretation (
) of this not long ago.
I can't cite the article, because I can't remember even where I read it.
However, the gist of the article was that in ancient times, when all these "laws" and "rules" were set down....people, for the most part, had very short lives. Young girls were considered ready for marriage when they began to menstruate....which in many cases was as young as 10 or 11. They often died in childbirth, or post childbirth, or because their bodies were just worn out from so many pregnancies. A long life was considered 30 years.
Today, sex with a 10 or 11 year old girl is considered pedophilia and "sick". In the US, is it even possible to marry, with a parent's signature under 16?
Many women wait until their late 20's to as late as early 40's to have their
first child! (my mother was a month before her 33rd b-day when she had me, back in 1952...that was considered to be very late!!)
In this country, the average life span is now 75+ years! Such a difference from even 200 years ago, let alone 1000 years ago or more.
Were we created to be monogamous for 50 years? Did those who wrote down God's Word on the tenets of marriage ever conceive of the idea that Man would live with one woman for that many years - that the
woman would survive that many years?
Science has shown that a female embryo has a better chance of survival than a male one does. There are more "live" births of females than there are of males. But if males can survive through gestation and the very early months of life outside of the womb, they are on equal footing with females for several years.
In the last century, females have had a much higher rate of survival during the childbirthing years, due to advancements in medicine and medical care during pregnancy. Because of this female to male survival is about the same, until somewhere in the 40's or 50's. It's well-known that women still have a longer lifespan these days than men do, though I think the gap is narrowing.
Man is the only being in the animal world that is "expected" to be monogamous. Why? Because we have been taught that through various avenues. Religion, culture, social mores.
A very wise man told me once a very long time ago......"expectations" are something that one individual puts upon another individual...not necessarily done with the second's agreement or knowledge. If done without both parties acknowledgement and agreement....those "expectations" are destined to fail.
According to the Bible...once we marry....we are "expected" to follow the tenets of marriage. At the moment of taking those vows....both people are "assumed" to agree to those expectations. And maybe they do.
But remember....it also says in many places in the Bible....that God knows we will fail...will sin. And He has also said that
He will forgive us.
(Which is a good thing....cause I'm not sure I've yet hit that "forgiveness" point regarding the sins against me.)
No matter how one looks at it....divorce is an issue to which there is no one right answer. It is not a black/white issue. There are so many factors that must be considered....on an individual basis.
Has marriage lost it's sanctity? (this coming from the woman who has lived with a man for 10? years without marriage vows
)
I don't know. It goes back to what we have often talked about....that no two people walk the same path in life.
It is, oh so very easy, to say ....Well!!! (point that nose in the air!)
I would never do that!!!!And that's great. Each one has that right to their opinion.
And when something happens in life to rock that same "one's" world....those words just may come back and bite them in the tush....and not softly either.
I know I drifted (
) from the original question that Snugs posed....but loss of intimacy does not just start out of nowhere. It is a result...not a cause. The "cause" must be determined to alter the result. Divorce is a product, or consequence, of the cause and result.
