I think the real problem was our primary. McCain won out of attrition; he just kept going like the Energizer bunny while everyone else fell out for one reason or another. Romney had the baggage of being Mormon and from the northeast. Huckabee as a Baptist minister alienated a huge chunk of the populace. Fred Thompson took "a day late and a dollar short" to new heights. Rudy Giuliani was too far from 9/11 to draw karma from it. Ron Paul... words fail me.
The sad thing is, each of these individuals represents a facet of conservatism. Romney is an excellent administrator and deal-maker. Huckabee has the moral background and supports the Fair Tax. Thompson is a federalist. Rudy G is strong on foreign policy. Ron Paul is a bit odd, but nobody will say he's not libertarian. Together, they're like the Republican Super Friends. Apart, each had a fatal weakness.
Had we gotten our sh!t together and worked this out, and picked a team that was worth a damn, instead of fighting amongst ourselves like a bunch of Democrats, we would be the ones partying tonight. My dream ticket was Thompson/Romney, with SecState handed out to Huckabee or Giuliani.
McCain did the right thing in the primary: he didn't listen to the pundits, but kept plugging away. In the general election he was all over the place, and couldn't find a message, much less stick to it. (I know of two people who talked about changing their vote to Obama over McCain's stupid "suspend my campaign" stunt.)
The lesson? Pull together and overlook the small differences, and present a united front.