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Offline A7X_foREVer

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What age
« on: June 20, 2012, 01:32:12 AM »
At what age do you think a teenager should be given birth control?
Do you go to them with "the talk" or let them come to you?
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Offline Porfiry

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Re: What age
« Reply #1 on: June 20, 2012, 01:51:13 AM »
First, at least in my state, parents don't get so much as notified, let alone do they have to give permission.  In short, your son or daughter could get birth control or abortions in my state and you'd never even legally have to know.

I have three adult sons.  I've never given them birth control.  One is married, two are single, and they are Christians who say they don't believe in sex before marriage.  I can kind of hear the snorts out there, but folks, I think it is still 20-30% are still virgins on their wedding day.  The media won't have you believe it.

We have discussed these things.  I have warned them of STDs.  I have told them what they are.  I have told them that condoms only reduce, BUT DO NOT ELIMINATE, the risk of getting an STD or a baby started.

I also emphasized to them that if they get someone pregnant, I don't want them to abort to hide it.  That I want to keep that baby alive.

Finally, I warned them that anyone they get pregnant can abort that child, possibly their first child, without their knowledge or permission.  This seemed to make the biggest impression upon them of everything I said.  They were impressed that they might actually really get someone pregnant; and that the resulting child might actually really be killed.

So, to sum up, I wouldn't give them birth control.  If they are old enough to go fornicating, they are old enough to get their own, in my opinion. 

I am grateful to report that no STDs or fatherless or aborted children have come into play.  If they ever do, I'll just try to deal as best I can.
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Offline Porfiry

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Re: What age
« Reply #2 on: June 20, 2012, 01:55:51 AM »
Not to hog the thread, but as to when do you talk to them, while they are little I just answer whatever they may ask.  When they are hitting pre-teen or teen years and are going into a situation where there may be someone else telling them about things that are MY purview, I just tell them, simply.  I take the opportunity to reinforce, also, what sexual abuse is and what to do if anyone molests them.

Boys should also be warned about rape allegations ruining their lives, and told what statutory rape is.  Most have no idea.
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Offline Wayne

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Re: What age
« Reply #3 on: June 20, 2012, 05:30:58 AM »
32
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Offline cmypay

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Re: What age
« Reply #4 on: June 20, 2012, 07:44:16 AM »
For us, it was a process that started in elementary school. Today, the schools teach "sex ed" starting in 5th grade here.  We took the opportunity to add our thoughts and feelings to the "facts" the school presented. Now I have three teens. The oldest, who is 18 and a girl, is actually on birth control pills, not to prevent pregnancy, but to control severe PMDD.  She is determined to wait to have sex because she wants to finish college before even having to think about marriage and babies. The two boys have been told, very clearly, that we would prefer they wait, but also that IF they are going to, they need to protect themselves and be prepared to deal with the consequences.
I think the most important thing is open communication that is age appropriate, more so when your kids are trying to do the right thing and their friends are all bragging about who's doing what with whom.
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Offline Gina

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Re: What age
« Reply #5 on: June 20, 2012, 07:48:56 AM »
I am already telling my son that just turned 12 that he can come to me whenever he feels the need. I am drilling it into his head about the std's out there.  I really grossed him out on a 2 hour car ride about genital warts.  I was really scaring the shit out of him  :lmao:
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Offline Rebel

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Re: What age
« Reply #6 on: June 20, 2012, 08:04:35 AM »
Quote from: Gina on June 20, 2012, 07:48:56 AM
I am already telling my son that just turned 12 that he can come to me whenever he feels the need. I am drilling it into his head about the std's out there.  I really grossed him out on a 2 hour car ride about genital warts.  I was really scaring the shit out of him  :lmao:

http://www.videosurf.com/video/south-park-proper-condom-use-std-slides-10790837
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: What age
« Reply #7 on: June 20, 2012, 01:41:44 PM »
Quote from: Gina on June 20, 2012, 07:48:56 AM
I am already telling my son that just turned 12 that he can come to me whenever he feels the need. I am drilling it into his head about the std's out there.  I really grossed him out on a 2 hour car ride about genital warts.  I was really scaring the shit out of him  :lmao:




Ummmmm...
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"Practice random violence and senseless acts of brutality"

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Offline Gina

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Re: What age
« Reply #8 on: June 20, 2012, 01:54:06 PM »
Quote from: Wineslob on June 20, 2012, 01:41:44 PM



Ummmmm...

feels the need to get with a girl dude   :hammer:  quit being so vestalike
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: What age
« Reply #9 on: June 20, 2012, 01:56:55 PM »
Quote from: Gina on June 20, 2012, 01:54:06 PM
feels the need to get with a girl dude   :hammer: quit being so vestalike




 :o         :panic:     
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“The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

        -- Marcus Tullius Cicero, 55 BC (106-43 BC)

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"Practice random violence and senseless acts of brutality"

If you want a gender neutral bathroom, go pee in the forest.

Offline RobJohnson

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Re: What age
« Reply #10 on: June 21, 2012, 06:58:03 PM »
It was much harder to obtain or purchase when I was young. 13 would of been a good age. I know girls that were getting abortions at that age. Most of the time the parents did not know and a neighbor would take the girl to Iowa City for the abortion (60 miles away) Once in a while a young man was lucky to find a mens room with a vending machine that had condoms. Now they sell them everywhere. But I think the explosion in condom sales was due to HIV and STDs....it seemed like none of the young guys ever really thought they could get a girl knocked up. Kinda sad.

I was adopted at birth so I am not a fan of abortion. I could be missing all this fun.

Trust me. It's not always easy for a  14 year old boy to walk up to a drug store counter and ask for a box of Trojan Magnums.  :whistling:

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