First, at least in my state, parents don't get so much as notified, let alone do they have to give permission. In short, your son or daughter could get birth control or abortions in my state and you'd never even legally have to know.
I have three adult sons. I've never given them birth control. One is married, two are single, and they are Christians who say they don't believe in sex before marriage. I can kind of hear the snorts out there, but folks, I think it is still 20-30% are still virgins on their wedding day. The media won't have you believe it.
We have discussed these things. I have warned them of STDs. I have told them what they are. I have told them that condoms only reduce, BUT DO NOT ELIMINATE, the risk of getting an STD or a baby started.
I also emphasized to them that if they get someone pregnant, I don't want them to abort to hide it. That I want to keep that baby alive.
Finally, I warned them that anyone they get pregnant can abort that child, possibly their first child, without their knowledge or permission. This seemed to make the biggest impression upon them of everything I said. They were impressed that they might actually really get someone pregnant; and that the resulting child might actually really be killed.
So, to sum up, I wouldn't give them birth control. If they are old enough to go fornicating, they are old enough to get their own, in my opinion.
I am grateful to report that no STDs or fatherless or aborted children have come into play. If they ever do, I'll just try to deal as best I can.