driving phobia

[franksolich]

The senior business partner and I had a discussion over the weekend; nothing important that causes any problems, but we're both kind of curious if others have the same phobia I do.

The senior business partner, who's eleven years younger than myself, is half-owner of a small-town automotive dealership (although his older brother really runs the business), and from that, deals in horse-trailers too.  His interest separate from his older brother's is in horses.  He's also a CPA, and I do accounting work for him; in fact, he's a pretty major source of my own income (he's the "big picture" man, I'm the "details" man).

We both detest and loathe driving--a most singular oddity among those born and raised in the Sandhills--just really despise it.  Not that we're unsafe drivers--we each pay the lowest automobile insurance rates of anyone we know (long time with our insurance companies, no tickets, no accidents)--it's just that neither of us likes to drive.

One can dislike something, but still be good at it.

To top it off, even though he's about a head shorter than I am, he prefers to drive high-riding vehicles while I like vehicles that are just a few inches above the surface of the road, but that's another story (there's a thread about that in this forum.....somewhere).

Sometimes we drive to deliver a brand-new (empty) horse-trailer to a customer--usually 200-300 miles away--other times we drive to deliver horses (he breeds them).

I have no problem driving anything hauling an empty trailer, or a trailer full of inanimate objects.

But I refuse to drive when the trailer has living things in it; i.e., horses in this case.

It doesn't cause any problems, but he just thinks it's odd.

Does anybody else have this "thing," being utterly comfortable hauling something empty or if loaded, loaded with non-living things, but adamantly uncomfortable about hauling something with life in it?

[marv]

We both detest and loathe driving--a most singular oddity among those born and raised in the Sandhills--just really despise it.  Not that we're unsafe drivers--we each pay the lowest automobile insurance rates of anyone we know (long time with our insurance companies, no tickets, no accidents)--it's just that neither of us likes to drive.

When I was 14-15yo, I couldn't wait to get a driver's license. Bought my first car when I was 15. Fifty-nine years later, I hate to drive. Been with State Farm for over thirty years - no accidents, no tickets. But I HATE TO DRIVE

Any time I can slough it off on the wife to run errands like the grocery store, I do it!

[CG6468]

Conversely, I LOVE to drive. Hit the road and let 'er rip, even in my twilight years. I've always loved to drive.

Never having to had to haul livestock, I can't respond to Frank's question, though.

[franksolich]

When I was 14-15yo, I couldn't wait to get a driver's license. Bought my first car when I was 15. Fifty-nine years later, I hate to drive. Been with State Farm for over thirty years - no accidents, no tickets. But I HATE TO DRIVE

Any time I can slough it off on the wife to run errands like the grocery store, I do it!

Whoa.  State Farm's my insurance company too; been with them for about thirty years.

I dunno how good they actually are, though, because all I've ever done was pay the premiums, never having filed a claim.  The agent's always very happy to see me, which he does two times a year, because upon seeing me approaching, he knows I'm coming to give him money, not ask him for money.

There's a third person here who dislikes driving, too--the neighbor's wife, who's in her mid-thirties.  She lives out here, but she was born and raised in the Kansas City area.  Because her husband's always working (and doesn't like to shop anyway), and because a second adult's needed to help with the four small children, she and I usually go to the big city together once a week.  (My work schedule is rather flexible, so it works out.)

It's always an Alphonse-and-Gaston thing; "You."  "No, you."  "No, no, not really, you."  "You.  I insist."

With the senior business partner, some of these trips can be really long, way up to the edges of North Dakota, Montana, or Minnesota, or deep into Iowa or Kansas.  My own personal limit is circa 250-300 miles per day, with about four "breaks;" any more than that, and I'm drained.  His seems about the same.

Neither of us would make good long-haul truck drivers.

[cmypay]

I don't mind driving, I HATE pulling a trailer. There are times when I have to pull a small trailer with lawn equipment, which I have gotten pretty good at. However, I refuse to pull the fifth-wheel. Just can't do it. It actually scares me.

[franksolich]

I don't mind driving, I HATE pulling a trailer. There are times when I have to pull a small trailer with lawn equipment, which I have gotten pretty good at. However, I refuse to pull the fifth-wheel. Just can't do it. It actually scares me.

You know, though, I'd rather pull an empty trailer in high winds than pull a trailer full of life in stable conditions.

[longview]

I like to drive and enjoy long road trips.  I don't mind pulling trailers, bumper pull or goosenecks, with livestock in them.  I've even driven semi's with cattle pods behind more than a few times (on ranch roads). 

But, I don't like driving dually's through town.  I hold my breath and try to sit taller when I get in tight spots with one because I "feel" like I'm going to wipe out things on either or both sides.

[franksolich]

I like to drive and enjoy long road trips.

You're normal, though, madam, for people from here.

I described three people who aren't, although admittedly one of them wasn't born and raised in Nebraska.

I suppose in cases involving myself, it's exacerbated by that one can't "talk" to me while I'm driving, as I can't hear, and concentrate on the road instead.  One hundred percent, I'm concentrating.  I'm not good company for chatty people when I'm driving.

When on long business trips spanning two or three states, when I drive, I do the talking while the business partner does the listening.  When he drives, he does the talking while I do the "listening."

There's no exchange, no give-and-take.

It's like being at a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous for me, "listening" as he drives and drones on and on about his former wife, who cuckholded him.  I dunno what it's like for him, myself talking as he listens, but I really don't say too much.

[marv]

Whoa.  State Farm's my insurance company too; been with them for about thirty years.

I dunno how good they actually are, though, because all I've ever done was pay the premiums, never having filed a claim.  The agent's always very happy to see me, which he does two times a year, because upon seeing me approaching, he knows I'm coming to give him money, not ask him for money.

Auto and homeowners, and two years ago we got a $35k line of credit through State Farm Bank just for medical emergencies beyond our health insurance - we're both in our seventies so ya never know. You might want to check with your agent on that. Also, the auto debit for the premiums through our checking account is pretty convienient.

I suppose in cases involving myself, it's exacerbated by that one can't "talk" to me while I'm driving, as I can't hear, and concentrate on the road instead.  One hundred percent, I'm concentrating.  I'm not good company for chatty people when I'm driving.

Same here. Wife gets a little pissed on those 1½ hour drives to the Sam's Club in Springfield. That 75-100 meters of road in front of me is the only thing in the world that I'm paying attention to.

About the "fun" thing, I tried a '70 Corvette in the seventies, and a '56 T-Bird in the eighties. Still didn't work.

[vesta111]

Auto and homeowners, and two years ago we got a $35k line of credit through State Farm Bank just for medical emergencies beyond our health insurance - we're both in our seventies so ya never know. You might want to check with your agent on that. Also, the auto debit for the premiums through our checking account is pretty convienient.
Same here. Wife gets a little pissed on those 1½ hour drives to the Sam's Club in Springfield. That 75-100 meters of road in front of me is the only thing in the world that I'm paying attention to.

About the "fun" thing, I tried a '70 Corvette in the seventies, and a '56 T-Bird in the eighties. Still didn't work.

Total different kettle of fish for me.

I loved the 2 seat sports cars UNTIL I got a job driving a school bus.   

Way up high, the huge mirrors, I can paraell park a bus easier then my KIA. There is also the fact that people get the heck out of the way when they see that [ big yellow] changing lanes.

Little by little after work driving my small car home I began to get nervous as I could not SEE over the tops of other cars or trucks.  City driving became a nightmare as I could not anticipate the actions of others on the road.

Color also comes into play, a bright yellow anything is hard to miss even driving with the sun in ones eyes. Gray of any shade or black, even red small cars and trucks can and are hit because someone just could not see them.

The reason I believe so many warning signs are bright yellow.

I find that I can drive or be passenger in a small low auto for years driving the same road day after day then drive or be passenger in a truck or bus and I see things I missed being at almost street level.   Example is to look out your front window for 5 years then climb on your roof top, what a difference.

No way would I be comfortable today or in the past 30 years driving across country in a SUV but I would have no problem in a big RV bus, those things cost more then my house but are in few less accidents then the biggest SUV made.

   

[longview]

When on long business trips spanning two or three states, when I drive, I do the talking while the business partner does the listening.  When he drives, he does the talking while I do the "listening."

There's no exchange, no give-and-take.

Some of scariest drives I've made were with deaf friends.  We talked.  A lot.  And by talking I mean "signed."  People in the back seat talk and the driver would turn around to see what was being said.  If I was driving, the person riding shotgun had to repeat the info from the back seat, because I'm a chicken.

Imagine chatty women signing fast and interrupting each other while whizzing along an interstate.  Holy smokes.   

But, back to the topic.  I've recently met a couple people at work that haven't been outside of their town because they don't like to drive.  They have good lives and don't feel they've missed a thing.

[shadeaux]

I love to drive.  I'm deathly afraid to ride with anyone else.  When I have to, I find myself holding my breath and smothering screams.  I know if we have an accident, we have an accident.  I think it's the control thing.

My husband hates driving.  He drives a lot for work.  He'd rather I drive if we go on a trip.  All fine and good but I feel the truck I drive is fishtailing on the back end.  I don't get jumpy until we hit 70 then I get little panic episodes that I struggle to control.

Recently, I pulled a trailer my husband brought home.  I followed him in his truck.  I almost had to pull over.  It frightened me.  It feels like the trailer was loose ?, it wasn't, the truck itself, may be sitting up high ?  I can't explain it.  I gave my son my car so I never got used to driving a truck.

All I know, is it's not for me.  I need a car.

I recently renewed my license.  For a week or two before, I almost decided to quit driving.  I have anxiety that bad.

[TVDOC]

I've been driving since I was about 10, and have driven almost everything with wheels, pulling trailers included  (as well as flown almost everything, except military, with wings).

I've always enjoyed it, and in my younger years, thought nothing of driving 1200 miles per day.  Alas, as one ages, the tolerance for those long hauls is gone, and along with it a good portion of my night vision, so my limit is generally 4-500 miles now.  We just finished a 3000 mile trip at Christmas.

No phobias, except backing a trailer into a tight place......never was good at that.

doc

[Thor]

I LOVE driving, too. Trailers don't phase me one bit except when backing up. I blasted through OKC on my way to Texas back in 2008, pulling a U-Haul trailer FILLED with furniture, tools, and other household goods. I was doing 80+ mph. My friend told me to slow down!! LOL!! Needless to say that once I hit OKC, I KNEW that I was pretty close to home & got a tad excited.

[Inga]

I like to drive, but the other drivers take the joy out of driving.

Such as drivers with cell phones and hitting the other lane, the ones that don't stop at stop signs or red lights,the ones that pull out on the high highway at a crawl,and those that want to get off the highway an cross two lanes in front you to do it,well you get the picture.

With these kind of people out there I can see the phobia you have especially with live stock of any kind. You're an animal lover. If anything happen to horses, cows, or cats. You would be heart broken if anything happen to them.You're responsiblity, right. A wing and a prayer is how I do it. Good luck.

I LOVE driving, too. Trailers don't phase me one bit except when backing up. I blasted through OKC on my way to Texas back in 2008, pulling a U-Haul trailer FILLED with furniture, tools, and other household goods. I was doing 80+ mph. My friend told me to slow down!! LOL!! Needless to say that once I hit OKC, I KNEW that I was pretty close to home & got a tad excited.

I remember that trip. You were a tad excited. But you had good reason. It was a long time since you  were home among friends and family. And we were happy to see you home.

[JakeStyle]

I got my CDL in Oct of '09 and drove over the road trucking for US Express until Dec of '10, and I developed a driving phobia while doing it.

US Express is one of the many trucking companies that relies on team drivers, one person drives for ten hours while the other tries to sleep for 10 and then you switch.  I couldn't sleep in a moving truck until I had been up for 48 hrs or so and was totally exhausted.  I was a hazard and I knew it.  

I remember reading about a trucker that fell asleep at the wheel in OK sometime around Oct-Nov of '10 and he completely wiped out an entire family; 13 dead, granparents, parents, and the kids.  I quite 2 weeks later because I was sure that if I continued, I was going to kill someone.

I do fine in my pick-up or on my Harley and I still like doing the spontaneuos road trip every now and then, but I will never get back in a big rig.

[franksolich]

There's something about driving long distances that's daunting.

The longest drive I ever made was from Winnipeg, Manitoba, to Lincoln, Nebraska, back when I was 19 years old; I made it in a single day, but man, by the time I was in northern South Dakota, about halfway through the trip, I was already hallucinating.  This, despite that it was day-time, that I was on no drugs or alcohol, and long stops about every hundred miles or so.

Four years ago, when an aunt of mine, in northeastern Pennsylvania, died, I decided I had to go there, and so took off, from here in northeastern Nebraska.  Two-thirds of the way through Iowa, I had to stop for the night even though it was only early afternoon.  The next day, in central Illinois, I had to stop for the night even though it was only early afternoon.  The third day, in central Indiana, I had to stop for the night &c., &c., &c.  The fourth day I managed to make it a-l-l the way from central Indiana to the westernmost part of Pennsylvania (i.e., driving all the way through Ohio), when I had to stop for the night &c, &c., &c.  I finally made it to northeastern Pennsylvania on the fifth day, too late for the funeral but a chance to visit anyway.

After three days there, I turned around to come back.....and it took five days to get home.

For those who don't know, the distance, one-way, was 1200 miles.

I was gone two weeks for a three-day visit.

I suspect the deal is when I drive, I drive.  I don't do anything else.  I simply concentrate on the road.  No radio or music (for obvious reasons), no chitchattery with a passenger, no drinking or eating while at the wheel, no admiring the scenery.  Just driving.  Perhaps so much intense concentration one burns out?

(I am describing instances where I've driven alone, nobody with me.)

Lincoln, Nebraska to Denver, Colorado, is usually considered a "fun" drive by many in this state, but for me, it was always a trial.  Whenever I can, I let another person take the wheel, even if it's my automobile or an automobile I provided.

I've described trips with the senior business partner elsewhere; he too loathes driving (even though he's the junior partner in an automotive dealership).  He once got a lot of flak from others because his 88-year-old grandmother needed to go to Valentine, Nebraska, about 100 miles away from their town, and he cheerfully let her do the driving, there and back.

[TVDOC]

Geez Fank, I see your problem......back when I was younger here are a few of the trips that my family and I made:

Estes Park, Colorado to Los Angeles, CA (23 hours).......nonstop except for fuel

Bethpage LI, NY to West Palm Beach FL (22 hours).........nonstop except for fuel

Bethpage, LI, NY to  Columbia, MO (19 hours).....nonstop except for fuel, several times

On one notable occasion......with two drivers, a friend of mine and myself drove from NYC to LA in 49 hours (In a Corvette......managing to pick up 4 speeding tickets along the way, during the 55 mph speed limit days).

Ah....to be young and foolish again.......

doc

[debk]

I hate to drive. Only do it out of necessity.

Never driven towing a trailer, or any type. Regarding driving with "living creatures"... I was ok driving around with my kids in the car, but I didn't like to drive with other people's kids along, and the few times I have driven with my grandchildren in the car, I was a terrified I would have a wreck. I also hated to drive buyers in my car, particularly if they had children along.

My son has a Tahoe, and I do like to drive it. Makes me feel safe, and I can see ahead quite well. Meanwhile, he is having a panic attack. 

[franksolich]

Geez Fank, I see your problem......back when I was younger here are a few of the trips that my family and I made:

Estes Park, Colorado to Los Angeles, CA (23 hours).......nonstop except for fuel

Bethpage LI, NY to West Palm Beach FL (22 hours).........nonstop except for fuel

Bethpage, LI, NY to  Columbia, MO (19 hours).....nonstop except for fuel, several times

On one notable occasion......with two drivers, a friend of mine and myself drove from NYC to LA in 49 hours (In a Corvette......managing to pick up 4 speeding tickets along the way, during the 55 mph speed limit days).

Ah....to be young and foolish again.......

But there you're talking shared driving; generally I'm talking solo driving.

The year I was a senior in college, a roommate and I drove from Lincoln, Nebraska to Anaconda, Montana for spring break (in a two-door 1968 Chevrolet Camaro convertible), and we got there (and back) in good time, but we were switching off every three hours or so.

I was too young to have driven on any family vacations, but the parents could get from central Nebraska to northeastern Pennsylvania in two days--one night spent in Indiana or somesuch--and quite obviously they had a different mind-set (as does the majority of drivers) about driving, than I do.

According to family records, the most trying trip must've been in August 1951 (long before my time), the parents and six pre-teenage children going from Moorehead, Kentucky to North Platte, Nebraska in twenty-two hours.  My mother drove the entire distance (my father had something wrong with his eyes).  

This was 1951, remember; they had to use two ferries and there were some gravel roads too.  Under the best of conditions, two-lane highways.  From what I can see, they left early in the morning.  By the time they reached Omaha, it was already dark, and my mother was allegedly falling asleep at the wheel.  They reached North Platte, 300 miles west of that, at 4:00 a.m.

By the time I was around, there were four-lane interstate highways.

It must've been Hell; the car packed with children and a grouchy husband.

But then and again, my mother liked to drive--85-90 mph if she could get away with it (in my time, on four-lane highways)--whereas this descendant of hers would just as soon have someone else do it.

[TVDOC]

But there you're talking shared driving; generally I'm talking solo driving.

The first three on my list I did alone....everyone else slept......

doc

[franksolich]

I need to correct my post above.

The spring break trip to Montana involved a 1968 Pontiac GTO convertible, not the vehicle named.

I caught some flack for this; it was another roommate who had a Chevrolet Camaro.

Apparently the car was a classic, but to me, a car is a car is a car is a car and so I didn't pay attention.

[CG6468]

In years past, we'd drive the first 1000 or so miles in one stretch, anxious to get the hell out of Illinois and into the mountains out west.

Alas, I can't do that any more, but 550 miles in a day is still fine with me.

[TVDOC]

In years past, we'd drive the first 1000 or so miles in one stretch, anxious to get the hell out of Illinois and into the mountains out west.

Alas, I can't do that any more, but 550 miles in a day is still fine with me.

Yeah.....we're close to the same age, and 500 is my limit now as well.........I really enjoy driving, especially at night, but getting old is a real bitch........night vision's shot, circulation's not what it used to be, and driving for a full fuel tank without a "pit stop" ain't happening any more........

doc

[longview]

The year I was a senior in college, a roommate and I drove from Lincoln, Nebraska to Anaconda, Montana for spring break (in a two-door 1968 Chevrolet Camaro convertible), and we got there (and back) in good time, but we were switching off every three hours or so.

I was too young to have driven on any family vacations, but the parents could get from central Nebraska to northeastern Pennsylvania in two days--one night spent in Indiana or somesuch--and quite obviously they had a different mind-set (as does the majority of drivers) about driving, than I do.

According to family records, the most trying trip must've been in August 1951 (long before my time), the parents and six pre-teenage children going from Moorehead, Kentucky to North Platte, Nebraska in twenty-two hours.  My mother drove the entire distance (my father had something wrong with his eyes).  

I think I see a possible reason for you not liking to drive.  Wrong destinations!  Anaconda, MT?  Northeastern PA and Moorehead, KY? 
Oh, boy.  It might be too late, but driving to the Gulf Coast or Grand Canyon or... so many other places, would just be a better reward for a long drive and a positive reinforcement!