http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x4584820"Temporary SockPuppet (59 posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your Ignore list Fri Jan-13-06 08:44 PM
Original message
A Personal Decision
THis sockpuppet was created with explicit admin permission and will not be reused.
I am fear’s hostage.
Several years ago, I was wrongly and clandestinely accused of terrible things in two separate incidents. The action appears to have been motivated by petty maliciousness in one case and by fear and racism in the other. The rumors were discussed and believed by literally hundreds of people, including those in administrative and dominant social positions. I found out about both years or months later from people outside the organizations, as no one inside them bothered to confront, warn, or face up to me in person. Prior to this, I was one of the most universally respected persons, but since then I have been stained, and carry a legacy of disgrace. Upon visiting one organization after my direct involvement ended, I heard about the accusation there again from people much younger than me, indicating that when I and the others left, the story and the mark stayed.
Though the accusations were never brought to legal ends, I fear that they carry the effect of multiple felony convictions. I believe that should I ever apply for a job that requires a thorough background check, run for public office, or make an enemy of any person, these rumors will spring out of my history, and because they are believed by so many people and I have no means to disprove them, be taken as fact. This won’t ever go away, no matter how old I live to be. It will follow me all the way to my grave.
I’m in a different town now, but I remain surrounded by people involved in both incidents. At any time, should I be recognized publicly, or should someone have a grudge against me, some of the very accusers themselves can step forward and instantly destroy my career prospects, social relationships, and most other aspects of my life beyond hope of repair.
That this has happened and that I cannot escape it shames and angers me. I want to loosen its grip on me, and gain what measure of freedom from the terror and stigma I can.
To that end, I am considering open disclosure and discussion of the incidents with the majority of my friends, so that among them I can move among them without such shame or secrecy. I see no means to eliminate the root problem, as it would require all the accusers, some of whom were never identified to me, to openly confess their falsehood, and for thousands of people all across this state to hear and believe them. I expect that if they hear about this, several of my friends will break contact with me, lose their faith in me, or no longer be trusting and genuine, and that I will not be able to tell with certainty which do and which do not.
I post this here in search of friendly advice and support."
