Author Topic: The Dodge Charger RT  (Read 1714 times)

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Offline OkieJohn

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The Dodge Charger RT
« on: March 27, 2008, 09:30:53 AM »
In late 1969, I had just gotten out of the service, with a few bucks in my pocket, cause where I had been there was no place to spend it.  I goes down to the Dodge dealer and bought a new 1970 Dodge Charger RT.  Yea the big bad boy, 426 Hemi, 4 in the floor, rip snorting fast mean, most excellent car.  I paid $4116 for the car.

It was the only car I ever owned that scared me to death, and I have always owned fast cars.

I had  the car about three weeks, when about 2:30 in the morning  one Saturday night, I was on the way home from a business meeting when it happened.

I am cruising down I40 just outside Clinton Oklahoma, doing about 70mph, when I decide to open her  up, so to speak.  I grabbed me some gear shift, plowed a furrow back into third and stomped on the gas to unleash all those beautiful horses under the hood.

Well that is about the time the little car decided to teach me a lesson, along with some new driving skills.  The tach shot up, the wheels broke  loose in the back, and the car went down I40, in a spinning fashion, all the while forcing my eyes to get really, really big.  The car never left the road, but I sure thought it did.

Now 38 years later, I am reading the newspaper and I see this ad for a brand new Dodge Charger RT, 525 horses of rip snorting, just plain damn fun.  I just gots to have me one of these.

Now after 60 years of driving, I still haven’t changed much from that 26 year old that day in Clinton.  I still enjoy stomping on the gas and smoking tires, and slamming back into second at 70 and putting on the big whoa.  For me stopping fast is as much fun as starting fast.  I am the kind of guy that will drive through 30 miles of city traffic, and never use the brakes.

Anyway, the wife and I stop by the bank, and fill up a Walmart shopping bag with some money.  See I learned a long time ago, if you  want to screw up a car salesman, just show up with a big bag of cash.  These boys never see cash.  Their eye balls cage, and their mouths starts watering, and they forget all the math they ever knew.

So we get to the dealer, and we’re greeted at the door by three leeches.
“Hello sir, what can we do for you today?” says the first leech.
“Well I want to buy one of those Charger RTs with the 525 hp Hemi, and I’ll be paying cash.” says I, as I tap the bag. 
The carnivore’s eyes kind of glaze over and he mumbles something about one moment sir, and heads to the back.

31 seconds later, suit guy shows up, who I find out is the owner of the dealership.
“Yes sir, how can I help you?” says suit guy.

Now I could go on and on with the stupid conversations that ensued but, to make a long story short.  You can’t get a 525 Hp Dodge Charger RT with a simple thing like a CLUTCH.

You can get one that talks to you.
You can get one that always remembers where you are.
You can get one that turns on the headlights and dims the rearview mirror for you.
You can  get seats that keep your bollocks warm.
You can even get one that remembers how fat your a$$ is and adjusts the seats automatically.
But you can’t get one with a clutch.

Nope, you gots to accept this thing called an automatic/manual transmission.

Now, I don’t know what Dodge was thinking when they made this calamitous decision, But I’ll bet there are a hundred thousand people out there, who are like me.  People who enjoy the control and that warm fuzzy feeling, only a clutch can bring.

I took my money and went home.  All my hopes of reliving my youth dashed.

Today, somewhere in the world, sits a tuner.  As he happily munches on his pizza, he’ll be struck with the idea of putting a six speed tranny with a clutch into the Dodge Charger RT. 



A millionaire will be born.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2008, 02:41:21 PM by OkieJohn »