I worked on Thompson's campaign in NH. It was hell trying to get ANYTHING from the national HQ. We needed someone with his ideas and a better marketability.
Oh well, can't have everything.
That being said, Huckster is one person I WON'T vote for come November, and Howie Carr nails it:
STORY LINKEvolution of a campaign: Huckster’ 08The end is near. That theme was no doubt a staple of the sermons of the Rev. Mike Huckabee, although the dope from Hope now refuses to release his fire-and-brimstone perorations.
But the polls before yesterday’s primary in South Carolina were a veritable Book of Revelations that his political Armageddon was just around the corner.
Too bad, because a come-from-behind victory by the former Arkansas governor would have put a real crimp into John McCain’s campaign as the candidates head south for the Florida primary on Jan. 29.
The Huckster was doing all right, I suppose, once one got off the main roads and into the red-dirt redneck districts where, as H.L. Mencken once put it, the howls of holiness are heard in the woods. But overall, the “Christian leader†seemed to know that the wheels were coming off his rusty pickup truck. On the Friday TV liveshots he looked spooked, like one of his favorite snakes had just bitten him.
Earlier in the week the Huckster promised to deport every illegal alien in the country - you know, the same criminals he’d been calling “children of God†a couple of weeks earlier.
It’s one thing to speak in tongues, it’s another to speak with a forked tongue. But his constituency doesn’t care. They just want to hold up John 3:16 signs in the end zone at football games during the point-after kick. For some of them, “Deliverance†isn’t a movie, it’s a way of life. They cheer at the end of “Easy Rider.†Teeth are considered an optional fashion accessory.
He won Iowa but it’s been downhill since then. The other GOP candidates have morphed into the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. He tried some affirmative action by hiring a Catholic as his campaign manager. But Ed Rollins turned out to be a loud-mouthed, over-the-hill dolt - a veritable Sgt. Carter to the Huckster’s Gomer Pyle.
Shazam, Sgt. Rollins, I think this here campaign is flat broke! Ain’t nobody throwin’ nothin’ into the collection plate. Do you think it’s too late for Jim Pinkerton to beg Newsday to give him back his column? It’s all ending rather badly, the way it did for William Jennings Bryan at the Scopes monkey trial.
The Huckster really jumped the shark this week when he attempted to win the trailer park vote by mentioning his deep appreciation for the taste of fried squirrel. He reminisced about his college daze at the Bible school, using a popcorn popper in the dorm to cook the rodents.
From a chicken in every pot to a squirrel in every popcorn popper - there is the trajectory of the Huckabee juggernaut in a nutshell, so to speak.
Who knows how Huckabee would have fared if it hadn’t snowed yesterday in his South Carolina base, the hookworm counties upstate? But God, as they say, moves in mysterious ways.
If the tracking polls were correct, Huckabee appeared to be headed for the same fate as his favorite college dinner - roadkill. From the penthouse to the outhouse in 16 days.
Now the Huckster’s campaign needs a lot more than a bottle of Chuck Norris’ favorite K.O. Fitness Recovery Drink. Exit polls in the early states showed Huckabee winning the support of 93 percent of the voters who have bumper stickers saying their cars will be unmanned when the Rapture occurs. The bad news was, among everyone else in the Republican party, he was running neck and neck with Ron Paul.
A Channel 4 poll of the Massachusetts GOP this week showed favorite son Mitt Romney with 48 percent and John McCain with 34. Huck had 3 percent.
So what does the future hold? Infomercials would seem to be the Huckster’s next big thing. His pal Chuck Norris has cornered the Total Gym market, but maybe the Huckster can bless shotgun racks and peddle them C.O.D. Even better, how about the Ronco Total Squirrel Fry-o-Lator? Can somebody shout amen?
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Amen, Brother Howie!
